To think we need to find a way to infiltrate the dog cult?

[dogsdilemma]

I'll start by saying I favour cats but love all animals. I don't want a dog just now because I find them tying. Would date someone who had one because, contrary to what I'm about to say, I like them and it wouldn't be my responsibility.

But the obsession drives me nuts. It seems no one can own a dog in a normal way anymore. As in I have a dog, the dog is a pet not a person, dogs aren't god-like solve all creatures, it's fine if not everyone loves my dog as much as me - like I am with my cat.

Someone gets a puppy and I go to their house - all conversation is about the puppy and I'm expected to fuss like they've just given birth. I can't say 'ah I've actually come to catch up with my friend, not have endless chat about the puppy's sleep schedule and whether or not it shat in the house today' because their dogs are their babies, so I should treat them as such.

Instagram accounts for dogs - captions written like 'my mum took me for a walk today, I had so much fun'. Only mildly cringy but wtf? Are you a springer spaniel mother or Katie from uni?

I do an exercise class and the owner has a puppy. She brings him along so he's not home alone. At least 15 minutes of the session I've paid for is always taken up by the hive mind fussing the puppy. Everyone loves dogs so no one minds apparently - except I DO mind. If I say this though I'm gonna be the dick.

I'm OLD, and every other profile says 'must love dogs'. I do love them but don't want one, and if I say this it's like I've confessed to being Hitler in a past life. Cue messages trying to change my mind, as though not being obsessed with dogs is a moral failure. I love my cat but wouldn't rule out someone who doesn't feel the same?

The final nail in the coffin. I've been dating someone new. Had an absolute shitter of a week so far - nothing he can help with, not really serious, just work stuff. His response is 15 pictures of his dog being cute to cheer me up. He's just trying to be nice but I do not get it. I wouldn't expect pictures of my cat to cheer anyone up except, maybe, me. I'm being narky but I actually found it so so irritating and cannot even fake enthusiasm to reply. If I say 'awwww cute, thank you' he'll continue with this approach. If I say 'cute but why would your dog cheer me up ha' I'm gonna look like a knob.

I have no problem with others doing what they want to do but recently it is infiltrating everything. I know there are worse issues but ffs it's so annoying - what is this dog cult and how to we stop it? Can I tell this lovely man I'm dating that I actually have little interest in his dog?!?!?

I can't and I don't expect to - people who love their dogs like family members don't bother me a jot, as long as it doesn't start impacting ME.

The exercise class - puppy doesn't belong there. It's unhygienic & it's taking up 15 minutes of class time people have paid for. Friends banging endlessly on about puppies & asking nothing about what's going on in my life (promotion, relationships etc) - surely just have a bit of perspective. It's a dog.
Man I was dating sending pictures of the dog - cute dog, but surely more reasonable to have a conversation and a bit of empathy instead.

I don't expect to be able to police others but I think it's perfectly reasonable to prefer human connection rather than just being obsessed with dogs??

The only thing unreasonable in my OP was the annoyance around social media posts - doesn't strictly impact me at all. Just find it cringy but I take it back!! They can post what they want but I'll likely unfollow them

Also the people complaining about cats - cats being in my garden doesn't bother me because I love cats. That being said I was having a conversation with a man who has an interest in birds & he said pet cats are causing a real issue in terms of their numbers - I took his point.

My cat doesn't go out though - cats being killed by cars is too common in my area and luckily the odd time I've put her in the garden with me she just runs back in. Seems to hate it. So my cat doesn't bother anyone either - apart from me when I'm late with her breakfast!

@dogsdilemma

yanbu

if I was upset about something like fuck would all I would want from my partner would be the mindless response of sending me some pics of his dogs. Like you say empathy and conversation is what is needed in that situation.

Alert alert alert

Poster thinks they're being clever, when they're not.

Alert alert alert

Thing is with cats, even if you don’t like them (or even hate them) they don’t actually change anything in your day to day life. I suppose there could be the problem of cats pooing in your flower beds but you get that from foxes and other wild animals anyway.

Dogs on the other hand can be dangerous, they smell, they are noisy, they take up space, sometimes have ticks, cause a nuisance, their owners leave bags of poo everywhere, the expense of councils providing dog poo bins paid by your CT.

Not a dog vs cats post, merely a point that cats do not impact the day to day lives of people whereas dogs certainly do. There’s no comparison.

We have to pick up cat faeces around our house on a regular basis. You can get Toxoplasmosis from cat faeces and the parasite can be passed to a baby during pregnancy.

If we're going to go down that route humans can catch campylobacter, giardia, toxocariasis, etc from dog faeces. Nearly all puppies born have toxocara, and it can actually cause blindness - not a good mix with an exercise class where everyone is all over the floor, and my not know they've even touched the poo particles.

Also not good in parks or all over pavements.

It's a daft argument though because anyone who's potentially been in contact with animal faeces surely just washes their hands. My argument was more annoyance rather than actual danger

Absolutely this.

In my OLD days I was chatting to bloke who seemed really nice and we had a date arranged. Then he started sending me photos of his dog and told me she was coming on the date and wanted to say hello 🤦‍♀️

I tried tactfully to say I’m really not comfortable with having a first date with a dog as the 3rd wheel and he sent me crying emojis and said - and I quote - Stella is really sad now as I’ve told her all about meeting her new mummy on Saturday and I need to comfort her now. She thinks you’re mean’

Yep the date didn’t happen funnily enough 🤣

@SamW98 good lord I've had the whole 'dog needs a new mum' more times than I can count as well.

It's not even that they want to include the dog for me - if we were already going out walking that'd be fine, I'd say 'oh hello Stella' and move on. It's the language that reveals their hand.

Before long you'd have to go home at 7pm to sleep on 1 inch of bed because the furry baby takes priority over an actual human

If you are physically ill when someone refers to themselves as a pet parent, then you need to seek help. That is not a healthy reaction, and it is a problem you have, not a problem that pet parents have.

@YeOldeGreyhound I was going to say exactly that! 😂

Honestly, some people are so over the top and dramatic about things.

Omg That's a good story for one of the "what gave you the ick" threads

It’s quite a challenge to live with though @JamJar59 do you think you can class that as a disability- would you consider it life limiting? Are there other seemingly harmless terms that cause this reaction, have the scientists identified it as an official syndrome or are you still battling for recognition? Wishing you a speedy recovery xx

I grew up having dogs, I love dogs, I dog sit for family - I have no desire to own one myself.

As long as I'm not stepping in dog mess or it's getting in my way I shop I have no issue.

However people who call them fur babies or introduce their new born baby to their "older brother" I struggle with 😂

We have a whole dog family - my dog is my daughter's dog's uncle, and he has a doggy cousin as well. It's all said tongue in cheek and doesn't harm anyone else at all. Some people have zero sense of humour.

Are you that dense? I wasn’t being literal about it. Next time I fall of my chair laughing, you’ll call me an ambulance!

@JamJar59 no, you were just being overly dramatic.

People not sharing your sense of humour doesn’t mean they don’t have one.

Like you, who’s got in a real tizzy over an obvious figure of speech?

Man I hate people like you. Getting triggered and worked up because somene feels differently than you about something. "Waa!! They're not allowed to feel like that because I say so!" So immature. I wouldn't want someone as a friend who didn't accept my pets as family and realise that they are as important to me as their children are to them. Our little ones are human and feline, we love our family the way it is and I am SO glad to have a husband who is on the same page with that, I honestly didn't realise what a rare breed he is! (Although we are millenials, the lack of understanding of fur children does seem to be an affliction of the older generations) As for people loving their pets like their children, it isn't as uncommon as some of you seem to think. You should read the brain imaging studies they did some years ago which proved that people do feel this way. Live and let live, you will be much happier. And OP, you probably shouldn't be in a relationship with someone who feels so differently about something than you do. I wouldn't keep someone like you in my life.

I didn't get in a "tizzy". I just suggested that JamJar59 seek help. And they are the one who gets in a tizzy over what other people refer to themselves as.

There's only one of us who has used emotive words such as hate on this tread and it's not me

I'm actually not worked up but you seem to be! Again, because I like dogs but am not obsessed with them, I am somehow an unacceptable person - morally deficient. Don't get it. Never will.

Nothing wrong with loving a dog. If someone wants to treat them like a child, no hard done to you.

It is lovely really that dogs are held in such high esteem that people are getting all annoyed by it. All that love is making people feel nauseous. Wouldn’t it be awful if we had to get annoyed by how cruel some people are to dogs. Mumsnet is a lovely world to live in, there’s just too much love. 🥰