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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find SIL's behaviour a bit odd.

177 replies

GymOClock22 · 15/01/2024 18:22

I'll start by saying I have nothing against SIL. We aren't really friends but will have a chat at family gatherings. I'm perfectly willing to hear I am being PFB about this.
I'm currently pregnant with mine and DH's first baby. We had scans a few weeks ago and got some prints for both sets of our parents.
We posted the scan on FB to let friends know (I know this isn't the most popular thing on MN).
Today I went round SILs. I very rarely go to her house but she had packaged up some baby things for me. Which I am grateful for. However when I went into her utility room with her I noticed that she had my scan picture pinned to her noticeboard. Isn't that a bit strange? I was taken aback at the time so didn't say anything. Would this make you uncomfortable?

OP posts:
bluechicky · 15/01/2024 18:36

scrivette · 15/01/2024 18:35

Maybe it's her scan?

Ooooh the drama!

ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees · 15/01/2024 18:37

You posted it on social media!!

For all you know I or anyone else has ten print outs here in my room.

It's weird but you can't complain about ger having a copy when you posted it all over social media.

BrassOlive · 15/01/2024 18:37

That's sweet, surely?

skilpadde · 15/01/2024 18:37

She put together some baby things for you, but you think it's odd that she's excited about a nephew/niece?

You've not only shared the scan on FB... you printed copies for your PILs. So PILs having/displaying a copy is expected, but SIL having a copy on a noticeboard is odd?

Family relations are going to be stressful for you if you hold things in a very narrow spot on the encouraged-acceptable-unacceptable-odd spectrum.

Let it go. Accept it in the spirit it's expressed and don't overlay your expectations onto everything that other people do.

Olika · 15/01/2024 18:38

I would find it sweet.

BagOfBollocks · 15/01/2024 18:39

The behaviour of both of you is a 'bit odd'.

Pretty much 50/50.

cheddercherry · 15/01/2024 18:41

Is it “her” actual notice board or a family one? Could BIL not have pinned it up as a first nephew thing too? We all put all kinds of stuff on our family noticeboard in the kitchen, son attaches stickers, random receipts, husband seems to pin everything that comes out his pockets… and any Polaroids/ invites etc end up there too. Basically, if I had a scan picture chances are it could end up on our kitchen board!

Lightheartedly, I’m just hoping she doesn’t just have the utility room as her only space, poor woman if not!

Tandora · 15/01/2024 18:43

Could you explain what the issue is?? I don’t get it..

BetrayedAuntie · 15/01/2024 18:43

Huh? I have photos of my nephew and always have done. He's 23 now and I still have photos of him up. She isn't DH's ex, she's his sister! Blood related to your child!!!!

spongecakeappleslice · 15/01/2024 18:43

Tandora · 15/01/2024 18:43

Could you explain what the issue is?? I don’t get it..

Same!

Wishitsnows · 15/01/2024 18:44

Maybe your brother pinned it there

SuperFurryCat · 15/01/2024 18:44

I’d rather it be pinned to an Aunts wall, than some random who may also have printed it off your instagram. You made it a public thing by posting it on social media, any perv on insta might have your uterus and unborn baby pinned up 🤷🏻‍♀️.

momonpurpose · 15/01/2024 18:45

bombardelli · 15/01/2024 18:25

I think it’s sweet. That’s her nephew/niece! Is it the first one in the family?

When my sister got pregnant we were beside ourselves with excitement.

I do too. My sister had my scan on her fridge because she was so excited to finally FINALLY be an aunt

sprigatito · 15/01/2024 18:46

SuperFurryCat · 15/01/2024 18:44

I’d rather it be pinned to an Aunts wall, than some random who may also have printed it off your instagram. You made it a public thing by posting it on social media, any perv on insta might have your uterus and unborn baby pinned up 🤷🏻‍♀️.

Er, so what? What harm can possibly ensue? Do you believe in voodoo?!

Makeupalley · 15/01/2024 18:47

I thought you were going to say she didn't mention the pregnancy or some other slight that made you feel like she didn't care!

Why do you think it's odd? That's she's weirdly obsessed with you and or your unborn child?

Now if you said she had some random scan pics up then I'd start to raise an eyebrow... But a new niece or nephew? That's nice!

43ontherocksporfavor · 15/01/2024 18:47

How do you know it’s yours? They all look the same to me!
Also you post this very personal picture on social media so all bets are off.

MermaidEyes · 15/01/2024 18:48

scrivette · 15/01/2024 18:35

Maybe it's her scan?

Plot twist!

Ponoka7 · 15/01/2024 18:48

It might also be for the benefit of her children. We've used other relatives pregnancies as education. So many people complain (quite rightly) when they have a loss that it isn't counted as a baby loss. It's really positive that she's this interested.

SuperFurryCat · 15/01/2024 18:49

sprigatito · 15/01/2024 18:46

Er, so what? What harm can possibly ensue? Do you believe in voodoo?!

Show quote history

No, I just don’t see the problem when the whole of her social media had access to the scan. Anyone could have printed it off. The Aunt is the least person I would be worried about personally.

betterangels · 15/01/2024 18:51

You put it on Facebook. For all you know, many people printed it out. YABU. At least she is family.

BagOfBollocks · 15/01/2024 18:51

I was going to say it's a bit strange that anyone who enters her house can now see the inside of your womb.

But then I remembered you've put it on Facebook! 😁

Spomsored · 15/01/2024 18:51

StripeyDeckchair · 15/01/2024 18:35

Are you sure it's your scan?
They all look the same to me - black & grey fuzz, how anyone can tell anything from it is beyond me!

I have 3 grandchildren and still struggled to find a baby in any of their scan pictures.

Theyarehere · 15/01/2024 18:51

I think this is really lovely and it will might give you an even stronger bond at parties knowing that she’s happy and excited for you. Lots of posts on here about SILs being jealous and mean so it’s nice to read one that’s nice.

Holly60 · 15/01/2024 18:53

I think that's lovely. What a shame you are thinking badly of her for it.

reddaise · 15/01/2024 18:53

I know everyone on here will lie and say the OP should be totally happy with this, they wouldn't mind at all, it's sweet, you obviously have a problem with SIL already to have this sort of negative reaction etc etc et-fucking-c

However - I totally agree that is WEIRD