Asking 30pp for friends 30th birthday

[seeitthroughmyeyes]

It's our friends 30th in June and we've found out the family have rented a house out to host up to 100 people. We've all been asked to pay 30pp for drinks, food etc. we've already spent a fortune for the couples wedding, previous parties etc last year and although the money isn't an issue, I just feel it's a bit steep to ask for 30pp towards all the food and alcohol, considering it's also a 45 minute drive away so we will have to fork out for taxis too.

I'd pay that if I knew the people hosting would put on a good party. I wouldn't if I was going to get an Iceland prawn ring.

If they had a night out in town with or without a meal, you'd be paying a lot more than 30 quid so you're probably saving money and having a private party rather than a scrum in town. A double G&T is easily a tenner plus food etc

Don't know if you don't want to but don't be sniffy about being asked to pay for a night out.

You’d pay the same for a meal out for a friend’s bday, but it’s not an ‘invite’.
i often host parties/gatherings and wouldn’t dream of asking people to pay. I have had meals out though, and then it’s expected people will pay their own way. Weirdly, then the bday person usually gets their meal paid for so it’s the opposite!!

Or, they want to get all their friends together so need to hire somewhere to do that. 100 people can't just rock up at the slug and lettuce.

If they were hiring a room in a club I'd expect to pay for my drinks, if they had a meal in a restaurant I'd expect to pay for my food so why is this different?

I think it's a great idea and my friends would too. But then we like each other and don't sit around bitching about each other's events like half of Mumsnet seem to.

It does though. They should have the party they can afford to host instead of the one they wish they could.

YANBU, OP.

Of course, but social expectation in friendship tends to fall on the side of attendance. I can’t see that these people are not ‘hosting’, they are arranging. £3k budget too… sounds like OP and friends are also paying for the Insta venue.