Professional photographer at a funeral

[Anonomum14]

I just recently heard that someone hired a professional photographer for their husbands funeral (30yr old - sudden/unexpected) large turnout.
I'm not judging their decision, I have just never ever heard of this. Would you consider this? Is this what people do now? Is it a trend? Personally I don't think I would, just wondering what others think about it.

I went to a funeral over 8 years ago now with a hired photographer, it was horrible! The man who died was a wonderful friend and his daughter just saw it as a get together. Her behaviour was awful and even had people posing infront of the coffin like it was some sort of monument.

I know someone who had a photographer at her partners funeral - he had a big turnout, and she told me the photos have helped her remember how loved he was by so many people from different parts of his life especially as she doesn't see anyone from 'his' life now

Did he seriously imagine anyone would??

Photographer here! It’s common in America from what I see on forums. I’ve only seen a couple in the Uk. I would not accept a job photographing a funeral if I was asked. I find it distasteful and disrespectful of the mourners if I’m honest.

No way. What a horrible thing to have in an album or on the wall. People grieving.

Videographer is fairly common in church - people want to live stream it

There was a tv documentary about funeral photography a few years ago. The widow featured said that there were lots of images of special moments between people that she would never have seen if the photographer hadn't captured them. Several people stopped by the coffin as they left the crematorium and placed their hands gently on it to say a final goodbye. She had exited first and would have had no idea. The photographer was very discreet and had a quiet motor on her camera. She didn't get groups of people together in the way you would have at wedding. She captured moments as she saw them . I was as sceptical as many people on here. I came away thinking what a lovely thing it was.

I wonder how those people would have felt if they’d been aware that their private, personal moments were being captured by a lurking photographer?

I have seen this at a funeral before. A young single mum passed away (cancer so she knew and arranged her own funeral) can only imagine she wanted her child to be able to have memories of how much she was loved.

I hate this but I don't like streaming funerals either. I don't think I'd attend if that was happening and would walk out if need be. I know people do it for those who can't attend but couldn't they focus on the professionals involved in the service only?

My father's funeral, I kept an eye out in case anyone tried photos but no one did.

I wouldn't do it but it seems to be a thing elsewhere. I have European relatives and they always post photos when they've been to a funeral 🤷‍♀️

I went to a funeral with a photographer- it felt really, really weird especially as the guy was not exactly subtle. However one of the speakers addressed it, saying it wasn't a <insert nationality of the deceased> thing, but due to the fact that the deceased children were too young to remember the funeral and the family wanted them to be able to look back at the photos when they were older, if they wanted to.

@BombaySamphire I think he did... I know he watched the video back a year or so after the funeral, and subsequently gave his (adult) children feedback on their eulogies for their mum!

I think pictures of the flowers or that kind of thing might be ok. Not of the mourners.

Yes. Some things are private and fleeting. It doesn't make it any less touching or beautiful. Not everything needs to be recorded and publicised

We took some photos of the hearse with DH's coffin in, those photos have gone into the life story books of the children we were fostering at the time of his death but we didn't take any at the crem or of the other mourners.

I think this is quite a nice idea actually.

For my grandmas funeral my mum asked me to take a video/take photos of the hearse and others did the same.

I felt really uncomfortable having my phone out and taking photos of it and I looked around and it seemed quite disrespectful that most guests had their phones out taking photos instead of focusing on the moment.

Having a professional photographer would mean you can leave your phone at home but still have those memories.

It could be for a number of reasons, it's a young person, the day of a funeral goes in a total blur or it could be perhaps that they have sick family members that can't make the funeral so they are having it done for them. Either way their choice.

I never would but I do sometimes wish I had a video of the service, of my eulogy, my son’s poem. The only thing I do have is the video we did, it actually came up on my memories today as I shared that for those who couldn’t come

Feels wrong. We had a fairly young tragic death in my family last year, very much tried to have a celebration, but even later on when we were a bit boozy and toasting shots, there wasn't as much as a selfie (young, social media mad crowd - others, not me!)

A family member posted pictures of my dad's ashes arranged in a crucifix shape on Facebook, that was more than ten years ago but my goodness it gave me the ick, especially as he was an atheist

DH set up a static camera to record DFIL's memorial service. The congregation weren't in shot so no intrusive "cameras in faces", but he wanted to have a recording of the service for those who couldn't attend. The friends and former colleagues who shared their memories of DFIL's life spoke very movingly, so I'm glad that the recording exists in case his grandchildren or future great grandchildren ever one day want to listen. It's in the family history file in case that day comes.

I think splashing it all over Facebook is different.

Definitely not just have the solemnity of the service or celebration of the person and remember it in memory and not catolouged in photography. Not everything has to be on sm.

It’s not something I’d do, but I’m also very uncomfortable judging the decisions of someone who has lost a 30 year old. Whatever helps them is fine.