Pub chef refusing to cook for allergies

[Allergyissue87]

Very odd experience yesterday, my son has a nut allergy and we eat out once or twice a month. Generally we get shown an allergy folder or directed to an app to check and given a quick warning about cross contamination and all fine. I know the level of his allergy and am happy to take a small risk of cross contamination etc, otherwise he could never have a meal out.
Yesterday we went to a chain pub, have been before with no issues, asked if we had any allergies, told the woman at the till yes a nut allergy, we've checked the allergen info and happy with risk of cross of contamination etc. All fine, ordered, paid and sat down with our drinks.
Then about 20 minutes later a chef came to the table to tell us he can't cook for us as there is an allergy and our order shouldnt have been taken. I was really confused, wondered if it was a new chef etc, I explained I'd checked the allergy info on their website, it doesn't contain any allergens and I'm aware of the small possibility of cross contamination but not an issue for his level of allergy, and he's eaten it before and all fine. But no, he was adamant he cannot serve food due to this allergy, he was apparently the kitchen manager and would not risk making a child ill, couldn't explain further than that and went back to the kitchen.
I went back up to the bar and asked for the manager, a young assistant manager gave me a full refund and apologised but still couldn't give me a real explanation.

I'll most likely complain through their online form as we wasted about an hour by the time we had got our refund and left, with 2 hungry children, and my son who now doesn't want to eat anything not homemade as 'the man said I'll get ill'.
Am I being unreasonable to expect to be served?

To clarify if my son ate a nut, or something containing nuts he would be unwell and need an epipen, but has been fine with previous incidents of his food touching nut-containing food etc and there wasn't actually anything containing nuts on the pub menu.

That's what allergen lists are for. It's a complete cop out to just refuse to serve anyone with an allergy unless there's an actual risk beyond "I can't know what happened before the ingredients reached the kitchen".

If this is the position the restaurant wants to take, they need a sign on the door and on their website saying that they will not serve people with food allergies.

The position that no child with a food allergy should ever be able to eat in a restaurant seems extraordinary.

I have experienced worse and worse treatment as a nut allergy sufferer recently in all types of restaurants. From point blank refusal, to being issued plastic cutlery as they can't guarantee the utensils are clean. It's to the point I don't go to restaurants now unless I can avoid it. I absolutely hate going out for food, which is a shame. I also don't eat takeaways.

You're seen as an inconvenience. Places will happily cater to vegans and vegetarians (a lifestyle CHOICE), and somehow guarantee the dishes are truly vegetable based/haven't been contaminated, - but if you're born with an allergy you cant control you are a risk to everyone and nobody wants the hassle. Evident by the mindsets of the replies you're getting, sadly. As Menomeno says above, "cross contamination" is code for lax controls. If businesses wanted to help prevent a reaction, they could. Again, you're not worth the risk.

2-3% of people are vegan in the UK, however one third are living with an allergy. If the blame culture/not wanting liability continues does that mean hospitality businesses just miss out on the custom in future (either from allergy sufferers themselves and/ or members of their family/dining party)?

In all honesty this is why when I’m asked about allergies in restaurants now I just say “none” since I was refused service in a cafe.

I’ve got a nut allergy but I don’t get anaphylaxis and I’ve only ever had 2 reactions in 40 years because I have to eat a significant quantity before I come out in a rash and my face swells.

I’m willing to take the risk there won’t be any nuts in a burger or fish and chips or whatever over having to listen to the “we can’t guarantee there won’t be any cross contamination” speech every time I want to eat out.

Having allergies isn't a protected characteristic either so it's technically not discrimination for them to say "no".

Actually, some severe allergies do meet the criteria of a disability so this isn't clear cut.

If your son is ige I can understand. If he's non ige then it's just a lack of knowledge.

I agree it was annoying for you at the time, but I don’t see how complaining is going to help.

The only explanation anyone will have for you is that they will always err on the side of caution for something like this.

It's inconvenient but I think he should be able to say no. You know your own son's allergy, but he's just a stranger to the chef and he obviously wants to err on the side of caution. Perhaps something has happened in the past when he has been working? Unfortunately, I don't think complaining will get you anywhere since businesses like this do not have to give a reason for refusing service.

Perhaps todays ‘special’ is nut roast or something similar, so not on the main menu, but nuts everywhere?

They should definitely ensure staff are aware of what can / can’t be catered for, but I think I agree that chef has final say…

Yup. I bet the chef heard nut allergy and panicked. Similar has happened with my daughter when they refused service (‘we don’t want to risk it with nuts’). In practice her worst allergy is egg but I felt like cutting my losses by that stage.

@ColleenDonaghy ,
There's nothing special about nut allergies.
Of course not. Nothing special about going into an anaphylactic shock because a trifle had almonds in it at all.
Probably just attention seeking.

whats the point of putting a sign up though sayng pleas state your allergies if theyr enot going to serve you

I'd complain about the time it took to raise the issue.

I'd not complain (much) about the chef not wishing to serve possibly deadly food.

Those of us with severe allergies are used to not eating out.

My child also has allergies for which he carries an epi pen, we have noticed since Natasha’s Law that increasingly nowhere will serve us. I understand their reticence as they can be sued etc however I can’t help but think it is horribly unfair to children who already feel left out and different from their peers. With allergies on the rise there needs to be better rules around food prep and cross contamination so that everyone can be catered for. It’s even started to creep into supermarkets, where previously a label would say ‘may contain’ it has now been replaced with ‘not suitable for those with x allergies’ which is awful because it would mean children like mine could only eat food prepared at home from scratch which is unrealistic!

What a crap 'Chef' Microwave operator

True, but that's clearly not the case with OP's DS as she was more than happy to risk cross-contamination.

I've had a chef in a hotel refuse to serve me particular dishes for dinner because of my allergies, I was disappointed as it really limited the choice but I accepted it because it's their neck on the line if it were to go wrong. They were really nice (but firm) about it, company policy.

They had a really helpful approach though, at breakfast they showed me all the things that I could have, and the staff were all well trained.

🙄 My daughter has epipens for a peanut allergy. However, other allergens can also cause anaphylaxis and actually be airborne, like milk (in cafes with milk frothers) and egg. All allergies (plus coeliac) should be treated equally seriously but people are freaked out about nut allergies and too relaxed about others.

It's a misapprehension that cam be dangerous.

You're missing the point.

Nut allergies are no more dangerous than any other allergy.

If you'd been before, with no issues...why mention it again?
If it was serious enough to tell them, it's serious enough for the chef to make an informed decision surely?
I'm with the chef on this one

My son has nut allergies on a similar level and I just don’t tell people anymore. It isn’t worth the fuss and hassle. They often get in a stress about it or his food comes out later than everyone else’s.
I carry an allergy kit with me at all times of course. If he was prone to severe anaphylaxis then it would be a different story.

More people in the UK die of dairy allergies. That cream and custard part of the trifle are far more deadly.

I think the main issue is the "May contain" label / lack of food hygiene in factories.

I do the same with my nut allergy as I'm allergic to a specific nut.

Apart from cheap pesto, weird chocolate and spiced Christmas biscuits from some European countries most food in the UK doesn't have it.

The main issue is my dairy intolerance. Funnily I know and have met people with allergies to specific proteins/sugars in dairy they know to choose from a menu very carefully. They will only mention that they have an actual allergy if someone like me says can't eat names food because of the consequences.

if your child needs an epipen for his nut allergy than I am sorry I would not want to take the risk.
I have ceoliacs and I have lost track of the times I have been told my food is gluten free only to discover mistakes have been made.
my understanding of allergies is the symptoms can get worse the more the person is subjected to them. Ie nut allergy children might not have breathing issues the first time they eat nuts but the second time they might.
I think this is being driven by you wanting to eat out - maybe eat out with your hubby.

Quite. It would be interesting to know the views of people who actually have allergies vs. those who don’t. As with everything in life, nothing is perfectly safe.

My adult DSS has an allergy to a couple of types of tree nut that sounds very like yours. He takes calculated “risks”, for example would not eat anything labelled “may contain nuts” up the side of a mountain or on an aeroplane, but might when within reasonable striking distance of medical attention.