Beside myself - DH in hospital

[ThomasTheTwerkEngine]

Posting here for traffic. I'm a first time poster, but been on MN for years.

My DH have not been feeling well for the last couple of days. Had intense abdominal pain for nearly 30 hours. Yesterday he agree to go to A&E (which is a feat on itself). He got seen and left overnight waiting for a CT scan to rule out either appendix or gallstones.

CT scan this morning and his appendix is inflamed, there's also something "they can see" which might signal a small bowel perforation.

DH went in for surgery at 2.20 this PM. Been ringing his ward since 5 PM to see how he's doing, but apparently he is still in recovery.

My question, I suppose is: does it take that long to be in recovery? Every time I ring his ward no one can tell me anything. I'm making myself sick with worry, I can't eat, I can't move. All I want to know is if he's okay.

I feel very stupid posting this, I really do, but I don't what else to do.

When I had appendicitis there were no CT scans, they just sort of guessed. And everything got delayed. Recovery took ages.

we had similar when DD had a v quick procedure a few weeks ago, she was asleep longer afterwards than the actual procedure took. The consultant came to the ward to see her & was surprised she wasn’t back yet.
she told us afterwards she kept waking up but wasn’t sure if it was over so went back to sleep 😳

I had this when DP went for day surgery. Took much longer than expected to recover. Meanwhile I was outside in the waiting room getting increasingly worried.

Excellent idea to eat something and the breathing advice is good too x Snuggle with your dog if he's amenable x Every minute that passes is a minute closer to finding out what you need to know and if you can distract yourself with mundane things, no matter how daft, it helps the time pass slightly faster.

We've got your back on here and I'll keep checking for your update that he's groggy but OK x

Hang in there xxxx

They would tell you if there was an issue. No news is good news.

Ds had his appendix (aged 13yo) out three years ago.

We went into A&E at 9pm. Got told he'd be first on the list the next morning at 7am).
He eventually (due to bigger emergencies than him) went down at 7pm.

They had to do it open rather than keyhole because of covid. They also found when they got in, that his appendix was twisted round and in the wrong place. The operation took 4.5 hours.
He came out into recovery at about midnight, and was moved to the children's ward quickly but that was because of Covid they moved you out quickly. Otherwise I think he'd have been there for a few hours because he didn't really come fully round for ages.
He woke briefly at around 8am and ate 3 bowls of cereal (hadn't eaten at that point for about 3 days) and then slept almost entirely for the next 24 hours, waking occasionally to vomit or for them to beg him to eat/drink. Tbf he always takes ages to recover from a general anaesthetic.
He has no memory of that day at all. He doesn't remember much between waking in recovery (one of the nurses was drinking coke) and the next day (talking to another lad on the ward).

I think if he hadn't been in paeds so I could stay with him, they'd probably have discouraged my from coming in until the next day at least.

But he recovered quickly once he was home, although he did stay in bed (very unlike him) for the next 2-3 days. And he's been fine since, if very proud of his rather large scar.

Please try not to worry too much OP. This sounds very normal to me (I'm an HCP). There's not just the recovery time to take into account (and that can take a long time, even with nothing going wrong) there's also the issue of the person answering the phone simply not having had the handover or not being in a position to call someone who knows the ins and outs of the situation. I have been the very worried partner of a person in hospital myself, and even whilst knowing the way it works I was climbing the walls with panic and frustration so I do understand how awful this is for you. Very good wishes to you and DH, and please try not to read anything too much into this delay in communication.

They kept DP in recovery for ages while they were waiting for a bed to be made ready on a ward. If there was a problem they'd have called you. I hope you can eat OP. Low blood sugar makes anxiety feel worse.

Not every child has a mother there though?!

please try not to panic, it seems like a normal amount of time to wait although scary im sure you’ll hear back soon! give your dog a big hug, thinking of you all 🩷

If they’re being kept in recovery for a bed to be made available, family should have this basic fact explained to them.
No matter how busy, someone in that department would know if @ThomasTheTwerkEngine DH is waiting for a bed, still coming round in recovery or whatever. His wife should be kept informed.

When one of mine had an op I was sitting waiting for them to come out of recovery when one of the nurses came out and asked me to go in and tell my child to stop screaming as they were frightening the adults who were in recovery.

I found it quite interesting as I'd never been properly awake in recovery before, for obvious reasons. I did get them to stop screaming, child phobic about blood was lying on a slightly bloody pillow. Fresh pillow stopped the hysteria which to be fair would have put the fear of God in anyone.

This. It's perfectly possible to wait for a while to go down to theatre once you're in theatre reception. The anaesthetist could have been called elsewhere, the theatre staff may have sent for him early, the previous case could have taken longer.

Then in recovery there could have been a delay with the porters or availability of a bed/ nurse to take him back.

It's easy for us to say don't worry, but as ex-theatre staff, please dont think this amount of time is in itself anything to worry about.

I completely empathise - my elderly Dad has had two major operations in the last couple of years and both times I was pacing for hours waiting to hear he was safely back on the ward.

On one occasion, he was gone for about 8 hours and there was some confusion that he may have been going back to a different ward. A very kind person on the main switchboard put me through to theatre recovery who were able to reassure me that all was well, but they were waiting for a bed to take Dad back to.

If you've still not heard, might be worth seeing if you could try this?

Yes, that’s normal. Xx

🙄🙄🙄 Have a day off.

To the OP, I hope you are okay. The wait is awful but I'm sure all will be fine (sorry if you've updated, haven't read all responses yet).

Sending a hand hold.

Can you go to the hospital and wait. Do want to see him tonight so you can feel assured?

I don’t know what the hospitals are like where you are, but I would not be leaving anyone alone in a hospital here. I would go there.
Hopefully he will be on the mend soon x

I sympathise my husband had a major life saving op years ago and I was on the ceiling. The surgeon rang and spoke to me what felt like hours after I expected and was very upbeat and positive with what a fab job the team had done with no clue how beside myself I'd been all day 🙈

Just here for the hand hold my ds had a general anaesthetic a few weeks ago and they took two hours longer then thought and wouldn’t let us in to recovery as he wouldn’t wake all was fine he was just out cold. Hope you hear everything ok soon 👍

I was going to say this too but then realised visiting time is over. Is it different for post op patients?

I’ve spent a long time in recovery before because my blood pressure took a while to come back up. I always react to GA that way. I remember the recovery nurses and the ward sister arguing because they wanted me gone and she wouldn’t have me until my blood pressure came up.

Last time I had an Op I was waiting from 6:00 am till 7:00 pm to get to surgery in the recovery ward about 9:30 pm. I don't think anyone knew where I was between times, or even until I rang the next morning.

OP, look after yourself. Eat something.
They always underestimate the times. Please be patient and try your best to not worry too much.

Op can you just go to the hospital? How far is it.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.

Be kind to yourself. It's perfectly normal to worry but breathe, eat, pet the dog, do star jumps, anything to ease the stress.

I wish your DH a speedy recovery ❤️