Lazy mornings

[newyrgrl]

Having a chat/debate about this with a friend so interested on other peoples views.

I work 3 days a week and on those days my toddler is at nursery and older dc obviously at school. So we are out of the house by 8am Wed-Fri. On my days off I prefer to take it steadier in a morning. A coffee, leisurely breakfast, catch up on chores etc. Toddler still naps around 10/11 so we can't do much anyway. Sometimes if it's a nice morning we'll throw on yesterdays clothes and go for a walk but not very far. When toddler is napping I'll have a shower, do make up and get ready and once she's up and had lunch we'll go out in the afternoon.

Realistically this is only maybe 2-3 days a week as weekend mornings tend to involve clubs, sports, birthday parties and so on.

In the holidays the older kids are quite happy to potter, game, read, watch tv in the mornings. But they do get a bit irritable by lunch time.

Friend has basically insinuated that I'm lazy to spend my mornings like this as she likes to be up and out pretty much as soon as everyone is awake. My argument is we probably do the same amount of stuff just at different times of day.

Fwiw even before kids I enjoyed a slow morning. I like to shower and do my hair before going out because sadly I'm not one of those people who rolls out of bed looking ready for the day. Obviously being confined by dd nap also makes it tricky to go far before lunch but I suppose that won't last forever. So am I lazy or do other people prefer this sort of routine?

I think your style of doing things is absolutely perfect !!!
i wouldn’t tell your friend much - she’s not exactly open minded or supportive if she feels the need to make such comments on something that is a non issue

enjoy yourself

Tell her to ger a grip! You don’t have to be busy every min of the day! Ridiculous considering that as lazy. You do what works for you and your mental health. Seems like you have a great balance going on there. Her opinion means nothing. She sounds more uptight than a crab’s arse.

@Ewoklady it sometimes comes up if she wants to get together in the mornings and none of us are dressed, fed, washed or remotely ready to leave the house 😂 I think she just gets a bit fed up of me. But it's how I roll.

Everyone's different and it's best to avoid discussing this sort of thing with other people if you feel they are judging your choices. I am still slobbing in my dressing gown on the sofa ... have done nothing all morning except a couple of social phone calls and watched a ridiculous programme about air fryers which didn't really tell me anything.
I do feel I've wasted the morning .

As long as your children are warm and safe and happy looked after, it's nobody's business what your routine is. The best routines are the ones that happily fit around you and your family dynamics. Life is so hectic when you have kids and work. I work so school term is very hectic mornings, god I love the (rare) lazy mornings in the holidays!

Just say to her not to call in the mornings and if she’s funny about it then don’t answer the phone or door. It’s a bit controlling of her really - you have a little baby

What's the actual virtue in "doing loads" and leaving the house early? Why is it desirable?

Sounds like she needs something to feel good about tbh. Let her have it but yes, she's being silly.

I'm so slow in the mornings I'm practically stopped. Young children benefit from a peaceful routine and their adult being relaxed. It's not like you're not taking them outside!

With the older kids in the holidays maybe you could start lunch prep a bit earlier and have them do more of it? Chopping a salad or something. Keep them busy from before lunch till time to go out, then your routine still works. But anyway, there's nothing wrong with them being a bit bored at one point in the day in the holidays.

I'm the same as you. Generally on non working days we have nice lazy mornings. We watch a bit of TV in bed, then get up for breakfast. Kids play for a bit whilst I tidy up and then we get dressed and head out for the afternoon.

Everyone does things differently, I would just ignore.

@Ewoklady she has a toddler & older one/s. where have I missed 'the little baby'??

That sounds great. I don't have the option during the week, but it's pretty much how I spend every weekend morning. Life is too short for rushing around just for the sake of rushing around. My dc are not tiny anymore and it's nice to bloody sit down while you can.

That doesn't sound particularly lazy to me. Lazy would be not getting washed and dressed and eating breakfast in bed while watching Netflix.

I'm currently on ML and our mornings are like yours.

DD naps between 11-12. However if the weather is dry we will pop her in the buggy and go out for the day as she naps happily there too. Albeit not as long.

Your friend sounds very judgmental. Not everyone's way of life suits others.

Tell her to piss off.

It wouldn't suit me, but horses for courses. How do your older ones get to school ?

You’re not lazy, you have a different routine that’s all. Do things at your own pace and as long as the basics get done I wouldn’t worry. Can’t your friend meet you after lunch? Why does everything have to be done in the morning? I’m saying this asa morning person (my idea of a lie in is to sleep until 7am) I wouldn’t dream of judging other people and how they spend their time

She hasn't directly called me lazy, it just feels like she's a bit frustrated by me. There have been times when she's called at the house 'just passing to see if we want to go to xyz' and I'll still be in my pjs with unwashed hair at 10am and I feel like she thinks I'm a bit scummy 🙈

By bus. No need to even do the school run.

I like your routine. Don't worry about what she or anyone else thinks, it works for you. 😁

I swear people like this have problems.. I feel like they're always on the go because they have issues they don't want to face so they need to be busy ALL THE TIME. It's not our problem!

Pity to miss out on the xyz perhaps, but then if your Dd sleeps in the am, maybe not.

It doesn't matter what your friend thinks. It's more a reflection on her unease with her own routine / life.

Nothing wrong with what you do. You do what works for you. It's a great feeling being up and out in the morning and a productive day, but some people think every day needs to be like that and it really really doesn't!

On maternity leave my mornings were like this. Baby napped about 10-11am so I’d shower and get ready while he napped and then get out for the afternoon once he woke up. But the mornings were spent in pj’s with a coffee and pottering about.

Heaven 😄

I like a mix. Some lazy mornings are fine, especially if you have no set plans. My kids definitely like a bit of tv and downtime in the holidays, but some days I will arrange to meet a friend at 9.30/10 or whatever

Tell your friend to text you in advance if she wants to meet up!

Oops haha this is my everyday morning routine until DS starts nursery. We all shower and get dressed and out the door at 8am to take older DS to school, then we take dog out and we’re back home until after lunch. He also naps 2 hours every morning which I use to catch up on chores/do a bit of work. It’s slow paced but it’s our routine and I know it won’t last much longer.