Lazy mornings

[newyrgrl]

Having a chat/debate about this with a friend so interested on other peoples views.

I work 3 days a week and on those days my toddler is at nursery and older dc obviously at school. So we are out of the house by 8am Wed-Fri. On my days off I prefer to take it steadier in a morning. A coffee, leisurely breakfast, catch up on chores etc. Toddler still naps around 10/11 so we can't do much anyway. Sometimes if it's a nice morning we'll throw on yesterdays clothes and go for a walk but not very far. When toddler is napping I'll have a shower, do make up and get ready and once she's up and had lunch we'll go out in the afternoon.

Realistically this is only maybe 2-3 days a week as weekend mornings tend to involve clubs, sports, birthday parties and so on.

In the holidays the older kids are quite happy to potter, game, read, watch tv in the mornings. But they do get a bit irritable by lunch time.

Friend has basically insinuated that I'm lazy to spend my mornings like this as she likes to be up and out pretty much as soon as everyone is awake. My argument is we probably do the same amount of stuff just at different times of day.

Fwiw even before kids I enjoyed a slow morning. I like to shower and do my hair before going out because sadly I'm not one of those people who rolls out of bed looking ready for the day. Obviously being confined by dd nap also makes it tricky to go far before lunch but I suppose that won't last forever. So am I lazy or do other people prefer this sort of routine?

Sounds fine to me.

You do what suits you and as long as whatever needs doing gets done, I can't see the problem. I WFH and luckily do not have to do zoom meetings, so I frequently do the initial log-in and deal with overnight emails etc., still in PJs with my morning cuppa. It doesn't bring the sky down or stop the world from turning.

Surely if she wants to do something with you in the morning and you want to see her you'll just decide beforehand and make sure you're up and ready to meet in the morning though? Can't see why this is even a thing. Unless you're actually saying you won't ever do anything social with her on a day off until late morning/midday, in which case I think that's a bit inflexible.

Sorry for the late reply, in typical fashion we've been out all afternoon!

To answer questions, I don't frequently miss out on plans. If things were planned in advance I'd absolutely get up and get ready. Although it would still cause an issue with the littlest as she doesn't sleep on the go at all, has to be in her cot.

However quite often it's a text on the morning 'do you fancy xyz in an hour' or dropping by. And I have to say no because I'm not ready. And no she hasn't directly said I'm lazy but I get the vibe that she thinks that. Maybe that's my own guilt talking.

As for older dc, I do feel bad sometimes and by lunch I am eager to get them out. Today for example we've had far too much screen time before lunch but we've been out all afternoon at an adventure playground type place, then cafe lunch, then a long walk. So it's balance at least.

At weekends they have clubs and sports so we do tend to be up and on quite early at least on a Saturday. It's just Sundays. And my days off. And school holidays. 😂

If 2 people with differing approaches to time want to meet, often compromise is required.

It seems socially acceptable to say "can't you, or why don't you just get up/get ready/get organised earlier or quicker" but somehow saying "cant you meet later, stay out, or go to bed , later?" Is not the same? I wonder why that is.

I have an acquaintance who loves getting up early and eagerly telling everyone about her 6am runs But somehow its not OK to question why they need to go to bed early and get up early (for leisure) in the same way people judge people getting up late.

I was going to say your friend sounds like a twat but then you updated and said she hasn't actually called you lazy. I think if you are happy doing things your way then get on with it.

However quite often it's a text on the morning 'do you fancy xyz in an hour' or dropping by.

I wouldn’t have liked that sort of planning with young kids anyway as I prefer to have a bit more notice.

Oh my god I miss lazy mornings SO much! Your friend is a bit of a douche