AIBU to worry about the hold alcohol has on the UK?

[whyhere]

Prompted by a thread about an alcohol-free wedding, and some of the comments therein ('boring.... wouldn't go.... take a hip-flask....'), it seems to me that the need for/expectation of alcohol has really taken a grip in this country. Can people really not enjoy anything without alcohol? Is it really impossible to create a soap scene without alcohol being involved (yes, EE, I'm looking at you!)?

Anyone doing dry January? (Full disclosure - come from a family of alcoholics and have been sober for around fifteen years.)

I agree about the influence and desire for alcohol, though don't think it a new thing at all. In one aspect there is less as boozy lunches and indeed drink during the working day is now less.

What I would like to see as small steps is the minimum unit price across the whole of the UK, and differential duty with a higher rates for supermarkets than for consumption in pubs.

But what is wrong with getting a bit drunk? It’s possible to feel pleasant effects from alcohol without behaving inappropriately.

It's not so much that there's anything wrong with getting a bit drunk occasionally. What's rather telling is the strength of feeling about there being an event like a wedding where you can't. The feeling that you can't enjoy an occasion without being a bit drunk. I'd have that feeling a bit myself about a dry wedding tbh, but I think it's worth considering why we feel that way and whether it might not be a very good thing!

It's nothing new, we've always been a nation of belligerent drunkards

I think alcohol ruins a lot of occasions.
Sporting events or summer food festivals...I don't really see why you need alcohol there?
Trains are a good example, also airports. Is this a change in British culture? Did licensing laws change or something?

Totally agree but it's only obvious when you step outside it.
I stopped drinking in May and it's been a bit of an eye opener in terms of alcohol and people's behaviour when they've been drinking.
It's possible to have fun and let your hair down without a drink, to me the problem is that drunk people think they're fun but are actually boring in a different way.

YANBU. There's something wrong if people can't have fun without alcohol being involved.

Most people can enjoy a wedding without alcohol - it’s more that people who don’t have a problem moderating their intake of or behaviour whilst drinking alcohol don’t see a reason not to have alcohol. If something improves your experience rather than dampens it, why would you view it as negative?

As someone who works in the NHS in a large city where alcohol & drugs are a huge problem I totally agree with OP. Alcohol can be enjoyed in moderation & can enhance social occasions.
However binge drinking is a huge issue leading to many A&E attendances & hospital admissions. Alcohol related chronic disease accounts for a huge part of our workload. Pancreatitis, ALD & other alcohol related diseases are increasing year on year & in younger & younger age groups. The social problems caused by alcohol are also increasing.

No. People are too repressed to enjoy anything without some alcohol.

I dont like the idea of alcohol free weddings because it's an unnecessary control to exert if you have decent, responsible people in your life.

Whoever is having an alcohol free wedding is clearly worried about someone in particular getting out of control so the best way to handle that is not to invite that person.

Unless you are with large group of close family snd/or friends weddings can be boring and hard work (especially if you are seated next to the groom’s boring uncle and the vicar’s mute son for hours, just an example of brilliant seating arrangement I have been part of) and then a few drinks really help!

I am not a big drinker but a dry wedding where you may sit at a boring table, long waits whilst photos are taken, interminable speeches…. You need a drink!

I have been to non-alcoholic weddings in Asia that were fun, but that did not have the format of British weddings (the boring seating plan and interminable waits during photos and speeches)

OK, as there have been a fair few posts regarding ethnic dry weddings not being boring, I'm going to put it out there that maybe alcohol is a major factor to Brits enjoying themselves because of British repression? Around 60% of my friendship groups are not white, and a very high proportion of them don't drink or drink very little, yet have absolutely no problem with getting the party started, so to speak. My white friends, most of whom are British, have a tendency to only hit the dance floor after at least two drinks have been consumed. Regarding the dry wedding thread, I think the comments saying it will be boring aren't necessarily bemoaning the fact that there will be no alcohol to consume, but more that there will be no alcohol to give them that armour of confidence to put themselves out there.

Absolutely!

In quite a few places, while people drink, you don't do stupid shit because you will hear it for years! I once did something embarrassing as a teenager (it was still tamed compared to what I saw some people on sat eve in the city in UK do) and 3 years later it still happened that someone did "oh lol you remember how you xxx, maybe ease up on the drink so you don't repeat that" 🙈 I was quite mindful since

I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where the majority of people were "sensibly" enjoying alcohol. That would mean one or two drinks, no? The vast majority of guests at a wedding are drunk. Blackout drunk, no, but drunk, yes, and far from what I'd describe as sensibly enjoying 😂

I totally agree with you, OP. I gave up alcohol 4 years ago because the hangovers were too bad even after just a couple of drinks. This had really opened my eyes to the denial that this country is in. Most people say they don’t have a problem with alcohol but at the same time loathe the idea of giving it up. If I can socialise without it (I am shy and an introvert) then why can’t others? It would fix a lot of society’s problems.

I've also been to many bars and nightclubs in Portugal and Spain (the ones frequented by the locals, not British tourists!) and again, not a single person was drunk I live in Spain and that's not my experience. The Spanish get drunk. They just eat while drinking, so aren't smashed, blackout drunk like we commonly see in the U.K. They are drunk and loud though and there are plenty of people doing the crab walk after being out from lunchtime until the early hours 😂. There are the same amount of alcoholics here as the U.K. though, just less obvious binge drinkers.

I have been sober for 10 years as was an extremely problematic drinker. I miss it, yes, but I don't miss the me that drink caused.
I will admit, I still get exasperated at times with the lack of places there are to go in the evenings for social events which don't include alcohol - the pub, a restaurant, nearly all events Everywhere you go there is alcohol. I'm not a fun sponge - really don't mind people drinking around me now, but just the lack of choice and the expectation that drink will be there is too much.
It's like people will panic if they don't have at least the access to alcohol, which is a bit odd

Alcohol has been part of festivities like wedding since time began!

There's nothing wrong with alcohol in moderation and plenty of people view alcohol as something that's a nice to have.
I'd say that if someone's response to being told there's no alcohol at an event is to moan that it's so boring not to have alcohol, they can't enjoy the event without alcohol, maybe they should smuggle some alcohol in etc then they've got a problematic relationship with alcohol.

I feel the same about people proudly announcing they're going to do dry January or Stoptoper as a challenge. All credit to them for doing it, but if not having alcohol for a month is a challenge, there's probably a problematic relationship with alcohol going on there somewhere.

Most people can enjoy a wedding without alcohol - it’s more that people who don’t have a problem moderating their intake of or behaviour whilst drinking alcohol don’t see a reason not to have alcohol.

I'm just not sure that's true tbh. I suspect that quite a large proportion of adults would feel that they couldn't really enjoy a wedding without alcohol.

I agree but you can't dictate how others plan and conduct their wedding. I went to one wedding where guests had nowhere to wait while the photographs were taken, nearly two hours. A bunch of us went to the nearest pub, not to get pissed or drunk but just to wait. There's nothing wrong with having or wanting a glass of wine while at a wedding.

I find it really depressing that so many people apparently can't enjoy themselves if not in an at least slightly altered mental state. Why should a "social lubricant" be necessary?

I feel the same about people proudly announcing they're going to do dry January or Stoptoper as a challenge. All credit to them for doing it, but if not having alcohol for a month is a challenge, there's probably a problematic relationship with alcohol going on there somewhere.

It's not necessarily a challenge for all the Dry January people though. It's often part if a general January health kick. I won't find it hard not to drink for a month. That doesn't mean it won't be good for me. I'll find it much, much harder to eat more healthily!

@ImCamembertTheBigCheese . I've never said that there's anything wrong with having a glass of wine at a wedding.
My point is people complaining that alcohol free weddings are boring. They're not, if they're well planned and the guests are looked after. Not abandoned for 2 hours for some photos.