To think I can teach my DD to drive?

[DrivesNowDriving]

My dd (17 next week) can drive. We live on a farm and for the last few years she has been driving on private land. She also competes in low level motor sport.

Aibu to think that I can teach her to drive on the road? My partner thinks I am crazy but as she has full control over the car, can parallel park/reverse etc so I can't see quite what the problem is.

I see parents taking out children after five or so lessons, but that is only enough time to start learning the art of controlling the car.

We would start in quiet roads etc and we get on well and work together well so not worried about her not listening/being over confident.

YABU- of course she needs lessons

YANBU- a parent can teach a child to drive.

This seems a strange post. I don’t know anyone who didn’t teach their kids themselves and then just use an instructor at the end for finessing and familiarisation with the test route.

We need them to have 120hours signed off before they can take the driving test and get normal license (not the Learner license, they get that after passing a road rule theory test). Instructors generally sell their services in blocks of 10hrs and per above, that’s at the end and generally includes being driven to testing site and home after. For the first 110hours, parents teach them, there is no barrier to this🤔.

@Hlly Anyone can turn up to their test in their own car (providing the car meets the test specifications) and take their test without any lessons from a driving instructor

True, but the biggest problem we face here is that testing car requirements have not kept pace with technology. All of our cars have the usual standard bells and whistles, driver assist, lane control, alerts to proximity to other cars for lane changes, reverse cameras, sensors etc. Absolutely none of this is allowed in testing cars so none of ours could use our cars for their tests. Instructors now have to have models that bear no resemblance to cars the kids (or anyone these days) actually drive, so they definitely need lessons prior to the test on driving the car they will be using for the test.

I taught my 15-year old so you can definitely teach your dd. And shes not exactly a beginner.
We started in car parks and state parks.

This is a UK site so the majority of posters are in the UK. Interesting to hear how other places do it though.

My instructor had a reversing cam etc but my own car does not, I park using mirrors and checking behind me. It is always useful to learn without all the newer tech so you are not completely stumped if ever in a car without it.

I thought most people would get proper lessons unless to save money. I honestly can't say I know many people who are such good drivers that should be teaching others (compared to a professional). I had professional lessons to start with, and I think it was good, I honestly think if most people are being taught by their parents that's explains why there are so many terrible parents out there. I'm definitely a much better driver than both of my parents. To me driving is a skill.

This is so interesting, I have thought about this myself the more people use these cars the quicker any actual skill will be lost. I notice now how most people barely appear to be paying attention when they drive as their car will beep if they're about to hit something, equally clueless about observing and not following another car too close etc, etc

Can you make sure to teach her how to use merge in turns? Shocking how ignorant the majority of drivers are, but at least they leave an empty lane.

Unless it's changed since the summer, this is not true. Mine both had lessons initially but then I took them out and we booked the test for them to drive in their own cars, I took them to their tests. As long as the car meets the standards on the gov/dvsa website it's fine. Obviously have to have passed the theory test first.

This is why we took ours in their cars. Their own cars are older than the instructor's car so needed them to learn how to drive their cars not something more modern. Not one of us has ever owned a car with all those bells and whistles!

I was originally replying to someone who said you needed to have a number of lessons ‘signed off’ by a driving instructor before they are allowed to take their test which is absolutely not true(not sure if this is showing correctly in the comments)

Also it is untrue that you can’t use a car with all those extra features on your driving test. You can use lane assist, cameras, parking sensors etc etc. if the car has the feature you can use it. 😊
There are a handful of specific car make and models that are not allowed for your driving test due to poor visibility or other safety reasons which are specified on the gov.uk website

@Justfinking I agree that driving safely is very important and I've paid for my two driving children to have lessons as I wanted them to have the expert input that a driving instructor can provide. The thread is more about whether its feasible without paid lessons and yes, of course it is. Particularly for people who can already drive - as teens who have grown up on farms often can. I know a kid who could drive a tractor by the age of 12.

I think of one the most useful skills in driving is judgement - especially judging the speed of other traffic as you turn out of a junction - and that only comes with experience and time behind the wheel so you need to put the hours in whether its with a qualified instructor or with a family member.

I would check with your car insurance company

Go for it! You’ve said you wouldn’t mind them having lessons near to the test so I don’t see an issue at all.
I drive a motability car and learnt to drive in it so I had to have official lessons but my Dad took me out loads in between. It was really useful.
I think a lot of people who have poor experiences of teaching their child to drive, it’s down to their dynamic in the car. If it isn’t working for you both then you’ll need to reevaluate and be honest with yourselves about how it’s going.

@Hlly Also it is untrue that you can’t use a car with all those extra features on your driving test. You can use lane assist, cameras, parking sensors etc etc. if the car has the feature you can use it

Definitely not where I am (not in UK). Good to hear your system is sensible and allows it. As I said earlier, here it’s just bonkers as the majority of cars here have drive assist features now, even base models of most average cars have many of the functions, so it prohibits most new drivers from being able to use their actual cars in the test and forces the driving instructors to get quite cheap makes/models that you rarely see on the roads here otherwise. As I said, bonkers, so good to see common sense has prevailed in the UK.

We couldn't get a driving instructor during covid and had to teach my son as he needed to drive as public transport to his college became very unreliable. Saved a fortune on lessons, and much better for getting more practice on the roads. Just recommend finding out the typical exam routes and practice on those roads.

Thought I'd update as I know search engines show this thread when searching about teaching your child to drive.

DD took the test 40 days after turning 17 and passed first time.
We used the AA Pass Your Test book to check we were doing the manoeuvres correctly and to refresh the correct way to do mirror signal etc.
I used Google to find test routes and followed these as well as general driving, we set aside time each week to practise a certain aspect, and I planned the lessons around unusual road features.

Relationship still intact, and it was definitely a positive experience.

Thanks for all the posts, I considered all of them.

Good for her!

I also taught DD to drive (which at first takes nerves of bloody steel) 😂 we started off in my work car park and then progressed from there.

I watched a lot of lessons and mock tests on you tube so I knew how best to instruct her. Eventually I got her driving all over the county so she had experience of loads of different roads and was comfortable in any new situation… Only when she was a great driver with many hours under her belt did I get her driving lessons. She took lessons for a month and then passed first time with 2 minor faults - her driving instructor said she was at a good standard when she went to her, so it is absolutely possible to do most of the legwork yourself.

I also know another 17 year old who passed two weeks after his birthday, having driven on their private land for years.

ND DS OTOH has had around 100 hours of lessons and failed twice, even after switching to an automatic. But driving doesn’t come naturally to him at all, with DD she was like a duck to water, so it depends on the kid too!

My Dad and husband taught my DD to drive - she had no lessons and passed in 4 months - could have been done quicker but she was studying for med school entrance exam & applying for early entry uni!

Edited to say - just read your update - well done to your DD!