To be annoyed in laws ruined NY fireworks AGAIN!

[Baulin]

So every New Year’s Eve we go to my in laws and have a small get together. However every time the London fireworks start, since the first commentary in 2021, I have to endure a massive rant and rave about left wing agenda which completely ruins the atmosphere of the night. I was dreading the fireworks display last night because I knew all I’d hear from the family is complaining and talking over the show. As soon as I heard the same sex marriage part I thought “oh god here we go” and then the homophobic whining started. I was fuming because it just ruins it for me. It’s as though they’re unable to dislike something without feeling the need to comment on it.

Does anyone else find this annoying from family and do you say anything or just let it go over your head?

@Baulin

As others have said, don't go! Not that hard. Mind you, I say that, but some people have zero assertiveness skills. One of my friends, says EVERY YEAR that she does not want to go to her DH's aunt and uncle's house for the 'family quiz' that his uncle creates... It's Christmas night every year from 4-5pm til about midnight.

His uncle (aunt's husband not blood relation) is always pissed by 8pm, flails about everywhere, dominates the conversation, and gropes all the young women he is not blood related to - his nephews wives and girlfriends, and his sons wives and girlfriends. (Even his brother's wife!) Creepy as fuck, but people just say 'oh you know STEVE, he's just like that when he's had a few drinks!' (God knows why his wife has stuck with him for 33 years!)

Anyway, every year my friend still ends up going. She goes, and then spend 3-4 weeks in January moaning about it. I tell her she has agency, and can decide to not go even if her DH goes. She said she doesn't want to be left alone on Christmas day from 4pm, and go to bed alone, and doesn't want to offend her DH's family.

Some women do need to be more assertive, and start saying NO to their men, and their mens families! Stop being a walkover. No WAY would I keep going. Nor would I keep going to my DH's aunt and uncle's place if I was my friend.

Yep, I had a less than ideal Christmas so we’ve booked to go abroad next year.

Hate speech isn't annoying - it is divisive bigotry. Do you have DC? Do you know they are heterosexual? Are they hearing this shit?
My Dad was homophobic but as soon as we were old enough we destroyed him every single time. DB is gay and now he can have a good relationship with his Dad, because we educated him. Yes we had to threatened to leave on MANY occasions and sometimes actually leave and go home! But he changed. Why are you allowing it to continue?

Yes I can certainly see why people get annoyed..

BTW there is nothing 'left wing' about same sex marriage which the Tories legalised. There are many gay conservatives, and a great great many non white - why is this being seen as a political issue? All the Tory's I know despise racists and many are black/south Asian heritage.

Oh FGS, talk about over simplifying. I wouldn't want my DC listening to homophobic hate speech whichever house they were in.
If you don't say anything then they will assume you agree.

🤣🤣🤣

I wouldn’t go a second time Tbf

YABU. You went there knowing their views, don't like it then don't go.

Why don’t you tell them how offensive they are? I’d have to say that I was massively offended if someone started with a huge homophobic rant!

Pavlovian Response 🤔 perhaps?

They hear NYE Bongs and the lid that has been kept on 364 days of their frustrations comes torrenting out in a sea 🌊 of bilge- to stop ✋ when the fireworks do.

Although the NHS comment was hypocritical.
Tories have run it into the ground.

I doubt they are bigoted. It is not bigoted to disagree with gay marriage, many people do so, and they are entitled to their opinion and also their definition of marriage, what counts as consummation and what counts as divorceable infidelity, all of which will play into how one feels on this issue - and bear in mind many gay people oppose same-sex marriage as they disagree with the concept of marriage. As for Mr. Khan, he is an utter pain who gives not a toss about ordinary Londoners, was outstandingly rude to voters after the 2016 referendum, actually putting on a firework display intended to suggest what idiots leave voters were, a hymn to the EU in a country that had said they like Europe but do not want to be part of a pan-Europe empire. His condemnation of many to paying the congestion charges in London because they cannot afford one of his preferred cars is staggeringly arrogant. However, I would prefer people not to discuss any of this until the fireworks are over. I watched some of Blackpool's and my DD sent me the Derby fireworks. You do not have to watch Mr Khan's show and if the inlaws insist on talking through the programme then I wouldn't go. I would also say 'Can we discuss that later and watch the fireworks, please?', if present.

How arrogant of you to 'educate' your father. It suggests the attitudes he held are actually also held by you, but in reverse. He cannot tolerate a different opinion and nor can you.

It doesn’t matter. Racism and homophobia are both illegal and immoral. They are disgusting people whose disgusting views should be challenged, whether in their home or not. If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem. In other words, if you stay quiet you’re no better than a racist and a homophobe yourself @RedHelenB

OK if you say so.
OP actually said they are homophobic which I think is fairly widely accepted as bigotry.
If you don't agree with same sex marriage don't get same sex married

That was @Grammarnut btw, returning the tag favour

Small fact check (because why let facts get in the way of your rant, eh?): the majority of Londoners are pro-EU, pro-gay marriage and pro-congestion charges. In that sense, “Mr Kahn” absolutely, bang on, represents the views of the majority of Londoners and is doing a bloody good job.

Don't you have any friends?

You're hardly in a position to complain then.

You want the benefit of getting out to theirs and the do they put on but you want to complain about their different views which you're fully aware of.

Maybe you just shouldn't go next time. Or just ignore/don't engage.

And the fireworks are not all that. Same thing each year. You wont be missing out if you went to another room.

Why do the fireworks set them off?

Uh oh OP

Your in-laws have found your thread

Yeh the fact that @Grammarnut is excusing homophobia and bigotry is interesting. Some people can’t help but show who they really are.

You don't have to go!

I’m with you. I’ve had to stop watching the news with my DH because every time the Israel/ Palestine conflict is covered I get the same tedious rant. Once was bad enough, but why would he think I want to listen to it every single bloody time! When in fact I’d quite like to listen to the views of someone who, you know, actually KNOWS WHAT THE FUCK THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT!

Definitely the man’s fault. They are such vile creatures.