I'm definitely being unreasonable! Comparing lives with Australians!

[teulie]

Watched a lot of Love Island Australia and MAFS Australia this year and follow a lot of the people from it now. Seeing all their stories all year and today for NYE, the sunshine, the beaches, the groups of girls all just having the best time being young in such a beautiful country with the best sort of lifestyle and it makes me feel sad!

I'm in my late twenties married with two kids, boring job, normal family life style but I look and think god could I of done that? Could life of been like that?

One of my old friends is currently in Australia so I'm seeing their insta stories all day everyday and it's made the pining worse than ever, I've never even been there and I find myself just wishing I could do life again and be born there

Op wherever you go, there you are.

Lived in Melbourne for a bit in our 30s. We were in a nice area renting and working at the uni. The city centre is quite small but the city itself extends for miles and miles. No use to non drivers like us. Not cheap cost of living. Rubbish tv. Climate is ok but it’s end of the world but not quite. New Zealand is utterly remote. Holidays of dreams but living there - no thanks. Coming back to Australia - Melbourne, Sydney might be ok. Brisbane - very humid, tropical rain season, dull modern city centre.

It was ignored and whitewashed by you too, when you claimed there was no culture at all. The culture is there if you want to find it, it's embedded in the land, sea, sky, in history and stories. It's not something you can bundle up into a pretty tourist attraction and it's not up to Australians to 'represent' it to you.

@Saggypants look. Of course there is culture in Australia. Of course. And thanks for being so patronising - I lived there and I don’t need to hunt down specially tourist friendly packages to “do” culture. (Ffs)

But compared to the UK, culture is limited.

I don’t feel the same about NZ - yes, it’s also limited in terms of being so far away from other countries and their influences, but the Māori heritage and language is respected in a completely different way. Children learn Māori alongside English at school. There is an innate respect for Māori history and people. I have heard so many people say incredibly derogatory things about Aboriginal people and heritage in Aus. Mind blowing my awful things. Often.

I wish my family life was like Bluey

I don’t feel the same about NZ - yes, it’s also limited in terms of being so far away from other countries and their influences, but the Māori heritage and language is respected in a completely different way. Children learn Māori alongside English at school. There is an innate respect for Māori history and people.

A lot of that is tied to the way they were colonised by the British. There was a war in NZ, the Maori were better equppied for such and the country as it is today was founded by treaty. (That's not to say there weren't atrocities, but the Maori were recognised as owners of the land from the get go.)

Good and decent Australians want better race relations and to undo the harm caused by British invasion, though they may disgree on how best to do it. I feel more progress should have been made in ~120 years but the systems of power and influence established by the British are well entrenched and it's slow going. To be lectured about it by the (I assume) British themselves is grating, to say the least.

Yep. As a pom in Perth , I hate these threads!

funnily enough...
my shoes have never melted on the pavement wtf?
I have nice furniture - again wtf?????
we have heating in our home wow

HAHA!

We’re from the U.K., lived in Sydney for 16 years, came back to the U.K. this year to see if we wanted to move back - a trial run.
Flights are booked back to Aus. Sorry but our lifestyle is significantly better over there. It’s way cheaper than the U.K., the food is better and cheaper, people are much friendlier, public transport works, healthcare is great, we go to the beach, bush walks, play sports, go to the theatre, art galleries, have BBQs with friends.
People over here have this odd idea that it’s racist and backward - umm sorry it’s just not. It’s way more diverse than the U.K., and nothing about it is backward.
So yeah, it is better.

@ShitChristamasPresents

I don’t feel the same about NZ - yes, it’s also limited in terms of being so far away from other countries and their influences, but the Māori heritage and language is respected in a completely different way. Children learn Māori alongside English at school. There is an innate respect for Māori history and people. I have heard so many people say incredibly derogatory things about Aboriginal people and heritage in Aus. Mind blowing my awful things. Often.

Essentially, Australians are just a couple of generations away from being purely British themselves, so you are really suggesting this about your own people. Until 20 or 30 years or so ago, Australians considered themselves to be British. Additionally, any racial tension you heard is an issue the British created in the first place, so criticism from a British perspective is odd.

Have lived there twice - once in my 20s for 2 years -single no kids and had an absolute ball.
Went back in 30s and realised I did not want my kids to be brought up with such racist small minded attitudes and any sons I may have to be such sexist pigs - so left again.

So many good bits to Australia but they did not out weigh the above and the cost.

I have lived in 6 countries in my life - Australia and one other I would not go back and live in, the rest were beautiful without having to be told I was an effing Pom every five minutes - even though I am not British. Just too rude - no, telling it like it is - is actually very offensive when combined with racism, bigotry and sexism.

Didn't take long did it? The usual rubbish is being trotted out ad nauseum.

When I was very young I thought the whinging stereotype was awful - soon changed my mind about that!

OMG that is so offensive to us with Australian children. Wow! 😐

I love it here. I love the lifestyle for my kids. I loved the uk but am so happy my kids are growing up here now. We have had lots of lovely Christmas events with kids playing outside, went walking in hills on the 29th followed by Dh and I going to see an evening performance of a midsummer nights dream outside in the botanic gardens. We have so much more space than London and are headed to the beach tomorrow. Coffee is great, I love mooching around galleries and the ngv always has stuff on for the kids.

I loved Christmas/New Years in Australia. It did feel a bit weird without Christmas lights, but I don’t enjoy the Christmas holidays in Ireland that much due to the bad weather. Going to the beach was great.
I spent a month in Perth and then the rest of the year in Melbourne and our flat must have had central heating because I don’t remember ever being cold inside (our flat in Auckland on the other hand only had single glazed windows so was very drafty in Winter).
I never saw any snakes or spiders etc in Perth, Melbourne, Adelaide, Sydney, Darwin or Alice Springs. They were all over the rural areas in between though. Frogs in the toilets and everything.

I agree with everyone who mentioned racism. They don’t want much immigration in Australia now so everything is set up to be as difficult as possible for immigrants. It’s the main reason I wouldn’t go back (I can’t without a visa anyway even though I was born there). I would have loved to have grown up there though, I would have had so many more opportunities compared to the crappy area I grew up in in NI.

New Zealand is great for a holiday, but a year there was enough IMO. I wouldn’t want to live there again, it’s a bit boring after you’ve done the tourist stuff if you don’t have family there.

It's a great place and you absolutely could have had that lifestyle - I did when I lived there for a while at your age. It was a dream, like a three year holiday really and a decade on I still get wistful over the place 😩. However, I chose to move home to have DC and be close to family and you chose (I assume!) to have DC young instead OP, so unfortunately that ship has sailed for you, but on the plus side you will probably have lots of free time to do as you please when your DC are grown up as you will hopefully still be fit and young enough to enjoy life so you can go travelling more then.

I’ve never been to Australia but it looks awesome to me 🤷‍♀️

I really miss watching Wanted Down Under…. People wanting to emigrate to Aus/NZ having never even visited!

I’ve noticed on MAFS that they all seem to live in nice houses/apartments,the standard of property seems higher.

The lack of sun here in the winter does get me down a bit which is also why it’s appealing.

When I've watched MAFS, I was always surprised how small their houses were, considering the size of the country!!

This is why I waited until I was older and 'partied' out before I had children, but the bonus for you is that when yours are grown you'll still be young enough to do things whereas I'll probably need a walking stick. Pros and Cons. Weather is definitely better though, a million times more so than the UK, no denying that. Be happy with your lot, boring is better than drama.

Yes it's hot

Yes you could get bitten by a snake/spider/ jellyfish

Yes housing is expensive

But you could also have access to amazing weather, outdoor living, amazing work life balance, fabulous healthcare.

I lived there for a year and did not see one spider/snake etc.

What do you do for work? Could you be eligible for Australia?

How about finding some different TV programmes to watch! I lived in NZ for years and really liked it but it has its problems, just like England, as does Australia. Being so remote is good in some ways. Cant say I’ve noticed people being more bigoted and sexist in Australia than England though.

Comparison is the thief of joy, OP.

You are very right in this statement. This might be interesting reading of how we allowed a mining company to destroy an ancient aboriginal site that had very important historical significance and of course a very important sacred significance and connection with the First Nations people.

When I was younger I used to defend my country vehemently against the allegations that Australia has a lack of culture. As I have gotten older I unfortunately see the sad truth in that allegation.

I hope that we could one day see it as constructive criticism and feel motivated to improve, rather than being outraged and offended while digging our heels in deeper.

https://www.australiangeographic.com.au/topics/history-culture/2020/05/an-ancient-aboriginal-site-was-blasted-away-by-a-mining-company-heres-why-that-was-allowed/

Instagram is not a real picture of people's lives. Get off social media.

So all the blame for racism in Australia comes down to the British and their influence from 120 years ago? The only conclusions to draw from such an argument are either:
a) Australia is inept at managing its own affairs, even given the 120 years it’s had to do so
or
b) is not changed because that’s how Australians like things

So the racial tension can’t be solved by Australians? Your argument seems to be that it was ‘created by the British’, but your country is seemingly incapable of changing it. It’s not a stunning endorsement