Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

“I wasn't asleep”

121 replies

QuitChewingMyPlectrum · 30/12/2023 23:41

What is this phenomenon? Is it only in our household or does anyone else experience this.…

Watching TV, DH has eyes closed and is snoring.
Me: Why don't you go to bed to sleep? You must need it
Him: I wasn't sleeping

HE WAS!

It genuinely winds me up - why not admit you were sleeping. What's to gain?

OP posts:
User373533 · 31/12/2023 02:23

If he is 'still having thought processes etc', surely one of the thoughts would be 'where the fuck is that loud snoring noise coming from?'

😂😂😂

Yeah my DH does this too. Adamant he was definitely not asleep and would definitely know if he was, while his mouth has been hanging open and snoring. See also, keeping me awake all night with snoring then telling me in the morning he has barely slept all night. See also also... Complaining that I woke him up when I came to bed and he couldn't get back to sleep for ages, even though he was snoring instantly.

PeopleAreWeird · 31/12/2023 02:29

Partner does this

He snores and then says he wasnt sleeping

Niece and Nephew find it hilarious
It annoys me! Why lie!

GrannyRose15 · 31/12/2023 02:45

Nobody is lying and some of you are being very cruel. There is a difference between being fully asleep and dozing. I have Fibromyalgia and one of the symptoms is poor sleep. I can appear to be asleep and be in that paralysed state which occurs during sleep but my brain hasn’t fully switched off. I am semi aware of what is going on around me and one of the things that disturbs that precarious state is someone else fiddling with the TV programme I am listening to. Very annoying. Why can’t everyone learn to tolerate their loved ones idiosyncrasies.

Esmerelda2024 · 31/12/2023 03:00

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

NumberTheory · 31/12/2023 03:03

I don't sleep on the sofa, but if I'm dozing in bed I don't generally know when I've fallen asleep and come to again. I feel like I've just been lying there trying to get back to sleep for 20 minutes and failed, but DH will tell me I was snoring for a good 40 mins to an hour.

WobblyCat · 31/12/2023 03:18

Does he snore? I've noticed this particularly in loud snorers and I'm not sure why other than links to sleep disorders for a couple of them. It's infuriating!

glassconcreteandstone · 31/12/2023 03:18

Shuggie1234 · 31/12/2023 01:20

currently on my phone next to my husband sounding like a fucking walrus 🤬🤯

Mate don't even, mine is doing the same yet every time I shuffle in annoyance or dare to breathe he groans at the heinous inconvenience!

DonnaBanana · 31/12/2023 03:28

You know what’s even more annoying? Self important people who see fit to wake up and berate people enjoying a nap by asking them silly questions.

CarrotCake01 · 31/12/2023 03:30

Because sleeping shows a sign of WEAKNESS!

Thursa · 31/12/2023 03:32

My dad did this. My husband does this. I don’t understand it. My dad could wake up the second you changed the tv channel though, grumpingly saying “ I was watching that”. No, you bloody weren’t! With my husband I say “go to bed”, “why, I’m not sleeping”. Your head was down, you were snoring, and I asked you a question you didn’t hear!

Glipsy · 31/12/2023 03:43

gradually turning the volume down is genius

NoMoreFalafelsForYou · 31/12/2023 03:45

Like my Dad.."I wasn't asleep, I was resting my eyes!"
🙄😁

workworkworkugh · 31/12/2023 04:07

It gives me the rage too! I don't care if he falls asleep during a movie (although it's slightly annoying lol) but it's the denial when I tell him he was asleep that I just don't understand.
I've done it and just admit it and say I'm going to bed. Is it a pride thing for men?

GaudeteGaudete · 31/12/2023 04:20

Mine does it in bed. Fast asleep, murmuring, snoring or full on sleeptalking, stirs for no reason at all, and then says that I'm keeping him awake. YOU WERE ASLEEP! 🙄

Nannasoo · 31/12/2023 04:33

Same here! Especially maddening when he choses a TV programme of less interest to me then almost immediately falls asleep. Luckily if spotted quickly I change channel and binge a mini series while he snores. Also we can be watching a series, he falls asleep, i watch til binged end then have Groundhog day as he tries catching up and sleeping again. I then have to sit through what i previously watched over several days...

thedefinitive · 31/12/2023 06:28

I quite like falling asleep in front of the tv and I resent being woken up and told to go to bed.

Just leave him alone next time!

Nanaof1 · 31/12/2023 06:46

EeesandWhizz · 31/12/2023 00:07

There's no way on god's green earth that my DH is listening to conversation or the TV, because you can't hear it over his bloody snoring!

If he is 'still having thought processes etc', surely one of the thoughts would be 'where the fuck is that loud snoring noise coming from?'

Show quote history

@EeesandWhizz If he is 'still having thought processes etc', surely one of the thoughts would be 'where the fuck is that loud snoring noise coming from?'

Truly, this killed me from laughing so hard! My DH does the same thing!

BatshitCrazyWoman · 31/12/2023 07:00

AcrossthePond55 · 31/12/2023 00:48

Oh God, yes! DH is a pro at it!

I've devised my little 'strategy' which involves turning the volume down very slowly over about 5 minutes until it's barely audible. If he doesn't stir, I turn it off. Works like a charm!

I used to do this with my exH 😂

It's enraging, particularly as he'd have put some absolute shite on TV and fallen asleep in front of it. Snoring like a stuck pig.

Blissfully divorced now, so don't have to deal with it. I don't nap a d have never been able to, so if I felt I was falling asleep I'd just go to bed.

itsgettingweird · 31/12/2023 07:16

My parents always had this conversation.

Never ceases to amuse me Grin

Snowflakecookie1989 · 31/12/2023 07:19

My husband was watching a foreign film with subtitles. Fell asleep but then proclaimed "I was listening to that" when I tried to turn over 🤦‍♀️😆

brainexplorer · 31/12/2023 07:22

I do this. It’s because of the way my husband accuses me triumphantly of falling asleep. I immediately have to deny it. 😂

LangMayYerLumReek2024 · 31/12/2023 07:29

It's very annoying when you've closed your eyes to have someone demanding to know whether you are asleep and instructing you to go to bed.

Leave him alone.

Cmonluv · 31/12/2023 07:37

Sometimes I don't KNOW I'm sleeping, I've just closed my eyes for a second...e.xcpet the irrefutable evidence that it's several hours later than I thought, the film we were watching is over and it's dark where it was daylight does mean I need to concede I've been asleep.

MrsMoastyToasty · 31/12/2023 07:37

DH does this most evenings, usually around 7pm after dinner. He's never asleep, no that's only for wimps!
The fact that he's up for work at 4am most mornings makes no difference....

Fizbosshoes · 31/12/2023 07:38

Yep, DH "rests his eyes" a lot in front of the TV usually when he's put some really boring programme on "that he really wants to watch" !!

We refer to it as long blinks. Eg dad's having a really long blink in front of the TV again