To be fuming with my DP - yep another Christmas one 😩

[bagpuss90]

DP was meant to spend Christmas Day with me and my family and I’m going his for Boxing Day with his lot - mainly friends .He’s a very untidy person ( or plain bloody lazy ) and has been going on for weeks that he has to tidy up before Christmas. I’ve offered to help him. He’s just rung me to say he has to stay at home tomorrow to sort his place out and won’t be coming to mine .He’s had 365 days to do it ! Still expects /wants me to go to his Boxing Day . My family will have bought him gifts . I could do tit for tat and not do Boxing Day . But that seems petty and I’d genuinely like to see his friends. He gets on with my family - so I don’t think it’s an excuse . He’s just failed to get his arse in gear .

He is probably relying on you to become stressed and to zoom around there and tidy/prep everything for him. Please do not lift a single finger for this lazy pathetic excuse. This level of disrespect should be landing him in the bin.

Darling, find your self respect. Do not allow anyone to treat you like an option.

I bet he hasn't bothered to buy any presents and he's suddenly realised he can't turn up empty handed.

He’s a twat with shocking time management skills - not nasty

I couldn’t be with someone who was like this at 58. Might possibly cut some slack at 20. Not that much though.

Still though, if he appreciated the invite from your family he could get up v early tomorrow to tidy and clean then spend the evening at yours or vice versa, or get up early Boxing Day. It's an excuse - he wasn't keen to go. Sorry

You don't think letting you down and standing up your family with less than 24 hours' notice isn't nasty behaviour?

You really do need to raise your bar. As PP said, this isn't the first time you've posted about him being a dick.

Were you born in 1990?

He would rather clean on Christmas Day, no sorry don’t believe it

But it is nasty, isn't it to so completely disregard a commitment you made on christmas day and subsequently offend and upset people just because he is a pitiful manchild who hasn't cleaned his own house. He doesn't care how that feels for you and is happy to disappoint to cater for his own needs.

There's no valid reason at all why he can't be up late this evening cleaning, do a stint tomorrow, pop over to your parents as planned and then return home to finish off. Going around the houses trying to make out it's otherwise might feel less hurtful but that doesn't make it true. He's selfish and a bit of an embarrassment, surely?

Sorry OP, I would be focusing on my own christmas with my family, that would be it from me if he didn't attend.

and It’s going to take him all day to tidy ?

what a loser

I find it hard to believe he’s going to spend the whole of Christmas Day cleaning.

All of Christmas Day devoted to cleaning? No. Not likely. I think it’s an excuse.

He’s had a better offer or he has decided that nice as your family is, he cba with socialising.

@bagpuss90 WHY didnt he tidy his place up today?? does he have anyone coming that he needs to tidy for?? cleaning on christmas day? he is nuts. he can do it the day after boxing day

So wait am I right in thinking he ditched you in Christmas day as he needs to tidy up?! Absolutely would give me the ick so hard. What a pathetic man child.

How bad are his time management skills to not know when Christmas is approaching and how bad is his house that it is going to take all Christmas eve and day to tidy up.
Don't think so. He just wants you to do it or is not bothered about yours on Christmas Day.
This isn't time management, it's just not caring.

Dump him. If a man did this to me, he wouldn't see me again, let alone on Boxing Day.

And 58?! No wonder he's divorced.

This guy sounds pathetic, he can’t manage his time, moans about food you send back, and you moan about him. Surely you just leave it if you aren’t making each other happy?!

Don't be a doormat. Enjoy your Christmas and leave him to his.

Please PLEASE tell me that this is meant to be ironic because the alternative doesnt bear thinking about.

It's plainly obvious he doesn't want to see your family and is making excuses.

Yet men seem to be as capable as someone at managing their academic lives and careers.

this but is just lazy about housework.

He cares so little for how you feel that he can't even be bothered to clean up his filthy house, which should be clean already.

Why in the fuck are you wasting your life on this feckless loser? It's mind boggling.

Has he bought and wrapped gifts for your family ready for tomorrow? Or is that the reason he is 'cancelling' christmas?

Also @bagpuss90

Get some fucking self respect and ditch this loser.

Why the fuck have you wasted so much time on him?! And dont say the old bollocks "When he is good we have so much fun and he is lovely" because that is just you excusing to yourself why you are so desperate to be with someone, ANYONE, that you will put up with almost anything.

Work on yourself.