In thinking it's not ok to reveal your son's ASD diagnosis to 4million strangers on Instagram?

[Dabralor]

Mrs Hunch - Instagram cleaning woman- has posted a pic with her little son. He's had an autism diagnosis confirmed.

How can it be justifiable to share his private medical information with all these random strangers? Wherever he goes now in his life, a quick Google search will reveal really personal information about him. This information is no longer his to possess.

If my parents had done this to me, I don't think I could ever forgive them. I feel really sorry for the kids of social media stars 😔.

Well as some others have said she’s damned whatever she does.

@OdeToBarney

She can't win. It's fairly obvious from what she already shares that he's autistic, so if she ignored these questions from her followers, she'd be accused of being opaque. Now she's shared it, she's accused of doing it for money and engagement.

Oh come on, she didn't have to share anything

Saying she has to share a diagnosis when so much of him is out there is utterly bonkers. She put him out there. She should never have done that. She was exploiting her kid long before his diagnosis came along.

Did you read the rest of my post, or are you just deliberately spoiling for an argument?

She didn't have to share it though did she. She could have just said now he's getting older I've chosen to stop sharing him on social media or simply stopped doing so with no announcement at all.

If people speculated then so what? She surely just ignores them?

The child is three to.get an autism diagnosis at three he must be quite impacted by his autism at the moment
Why are people assuming that he will be able to understand what his mother has done when he's older ?
My son wss diagnosed with autism at three and at 13 is severely autistic and non verbal, he would have no clue if I divulged this on social media or had any understanding that he's autistic
The spectrum is huge and
Mrs Hinch s child may make huge strides ,but it can't be assumed .

I agree with OP and don't think it's OK to share any medical information about a child who can't consent on social media.

That includes all the things you mention, and with neurodiversity - autism, ADHD etc, the reality is that there is still some stigma attached to these and a lot of misconceptions.

I would not want the first thing someone knows about me to be that I am autistic/ neurodiverse/ etc. because some people have a certain impression of what that might mean, rightly or wrongly.

I would want them to get to know me as a person first and tell them in my own time, if at all.

Children should have the same rights as adults in regard to this.

If one of my family members posted all over social media that I am autistic, I would be beside myself and very upset with them. It is not their information to share.

Why shouldn't a child have the same rights?

I think she did the right thing, she gets questioned on this all the time and she also has awful things written on some forums about her child, particularly tattle. There is no shame in autism, it was fairly clear this was his diagnosis, and if she can help others managing the same thing,then that’s good.

I actually wonder if some of the kids of these influencers will go on to sue their parents in the future. There was a Stacey Dooley documentary about one family and they were virtually prostituting their kids. It's not on.

Sharing a medical diagnosis like this isn't on, either and shows how addicted she is to the attention. I cannot abide this influencer lifestyle. That child deserves privacy, dignity and anonymity, which he now doesn't have because of his mother.

I'm Autistic and so is my 12 year old. I don't share photos or deeply personal private medical info online, because it's her private business. (As in I don't share on any personal social media - I may discuss anonymously here on relevant boards)

I predict that Ms Hinch will be diagnosed ND herself in the near future (sorry, I dont know if she already is) and will do all the interviews and another book. I'm saying all that as an ND person and occasional over-sharer myself. I just can't abide the vulgar desperation for fame and attention dressed up as awareness.

I hate people conflating privacy with 'being ashamed' of something.

There was a thread recently where a poster objected to the GP surgery calling out 'Mrs X, please come through for your smear test' in the waiting room. So many posters said she was unreasonable for not wanting that information broadcast to everyone present and she must think smear tests are shameful.

People are owed privacy! It's not about being ashamed of something. It's about their right to reveal things about themselves on their own terms (and in this case, a young child now has no say in what millions of people know about him).

@OdeToBarney

Did you read the rest of my post, or are you just deliberately spoiling for an argument?

Christ, no I actually didn't

Not looking for an argument here, happy to be wrong!

That’s a bit extreme, surely irs your friends and family etc on there. To think you cannot show pics of your child is very extreme.

Nothing surprises when they share nappy contents (according to a poster on here- which I can believe!). Nothing is private or sacred anymore for many.

@pillof Exactly. Not wanting to share something with the entire world doesn't mean you are ashamed of it. It just means you don't want to share it with the entire world.

Agree. I have thought this for some time. If nothing else, it could lead to a fracture of relationships between parents and child.

I have never posted photos of my kids and they have now left home. I can understand people posting the odd photo of birthdays etc. But to document private moments, or to post photos of almost every day of their lives? Nope, too much.

There was a MN thread earlier this year about parents who had, with the very best of intentions, responded to their toddler's autism dx by throwing themselves into fundraising and giving interviews to 'raise awareness'. Once the child was a teen she Googled herself and was very distressed to realise that there was a huge amount of very sensitive medical information associated with her name.

YANBU but YABU to look to a social media influencer for examples of good practice here. Mrs H and the like have monetised their home lives and children for years and this is just another example. I strongly suspect that as the children of influencers reach adulthood in the coming years we will see a lot of test cases as they wrest control of their images back from their parents and I imagine legislation will follow. Theoretically the 'right to be forgotten' already exists in law but God knows how Hinch Jr. could be expected to make use of it.

I agree about not putting children’s lives on the internet for everyone to see. What I’m uncomfortable with is singling out the ASD diagnosis as something ‘really personal’ that will ‘follow him’ when he’s older. Being autistic is not something to be ashamed of or something that needs to be hidden and you are insinuating that by singling that particular aspect out above all the info being put on the internet about that child.

It doesn't matter whether it's autism or another condition - I would not want any private details like that plastered across the internet. I don't even share my medical history with people I know in real life. It's nothing to be ashamed of but it's personal and should be the child's choice who he tells about it, particularly when older. If I wanted to talk about my children in that way I would do it without revealing our identities ie with a pseudonym and no photos.

Waiting for the first generation of kids who have been exploited for clicks to be suing their parents.

Can't get worked up about this

When I was a child I used to feel mortified if I heard my Mum discussing anything about me with her friends/other family members, especially if it was something I was embarrassed about. I was always very private and got embarrassed over the smallest thing. I used to worry about a lot of silly irrational things as a child, and Mum used to openly tell people. I would just die of embarrassment. I am still a bit like that, so I have to limit what I share with certain people.

I can't imagine how utterly distraught I would be if my Mum/anyone was sharing my information on social media when I was a kid. Even if it is not something you should feel embarrassed about, it should still be an individual choice to share your information. I think social media types who use their kids for content & as a source of income are abhorrent and I wish it was made illegal. I can't wait for all of these kids to sue their parents in a couple decades time!

You are very very naive to believe that.

If you don't understand the judgement and stigma that still exists towards people with learning difficulties, mental health or autism/ADHD etc then all I can say is the ignorance you live in must be bliss.

Due to the associated stigma and potential for discrimination in the future e.g with employment - it should be down to the child when their an adult to decide how much they wish to share.

It is not the same as diabetes and to compare it to a broken leg......is ridiculous.

Just because lots of celebrities over share - doesn't make it ok. Lots of men used to slap the arses of women in the workplace - that was 'normal' back then - again didn't make it ok.

Have you all ever seen the comments on sm (and here) about celebrity children? I came across the most horrible thread after the youngest acted up with Kate (princess Catherine). People might give the child a bit more leeway or space if they know it’s not so clear cut.

I think it’s disgusting - it’s not her personal/medical information to share and her son is too young to understand/give consent.

[A sibling has severe autism and my DC is neurodiverse, so not saying this because I feel that an ASD diagnosis is anything to be ashamed of]

Replace ASD with testicular torsion, or asthma, or chicken pox, or any other medical condition you can think of. It's private medical information which has been made public by the parent and will remain so for the rest of his life, even if he tries to use the 'right to be forgotten'. The principle is unchanged.

So true.
People absolutely think I'm certain situations children are being a spoilt brat.
But they wouldn't be so quick to jump to that conclusion if they knew they were autistic/ADHD or whatever