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Original poster

Once in a lifetime trip - 3 weeks off school

935 replies

XMissPlacedX · 14/12/2023 20:27

My daughter has always wanted to go to Disney world Florida, but due to funds I've not been able to afford it. She is 14.

Her aunty who is quite well off and has a daughter the same age (my dd's cousin ) goes to Disney world Florida every 2 years and has offered to take my dd next year for 3 weeks.

The problem is it's the first 3 weeks of the school term ( September 2024). I've asked her if there was anyway of going in the summer holidays and she said it would double their cost and it would be cheaper for them to pay the school fine .

What do I do ? Do I say yes or no ? I would love for my dd to go but am not sure how much the fine would be and what impact missing that amount of school would cause.

I'm really torn

OP posts:
ThanksItHasPockets · 15/12/2023 19:09

Jasnijade · 15/12/2023 17:33

Ask the school to give you the work she’ll miss while she’s away so she can work on it. I think you’ll be surprised how little there is.

Do not do this. How entitled. Virtually every school now has a policy not to provide work for pupils who are avoidably absent, and rightly so.

OVienna · 15/12/2023 19:12

DragonFly98 · 15/12/2023 19:06

It's 15 days not 21.

Show quote history

Time off later on the year for genuine illness would trigger it.

ManchesterLu · 15/12/2023 19:12

No. She has her whole life ahead of her to go to Disney if she wants to. Particularly when she's working and can pay for it herself.

And if she can never afford to then I'm not being funny but it's tough. I'll never get to Disney. It's not a birth right.

Cyb3rg4l · 15/12/2023 19:14

She 14 so if she misses 3 weeks of school she should will be then playing catch up all year as she is studying for GCSEs. It’s not how much potential fines will cost but more what the lost time will cost your daughter tbh.

Sallyh87 · 15/12/2023 19:14

I missed about 6 week at that age (due to I’ll health) and I was one of the top of my year. Also went to a good university etc and have a good career.

I don’t think 3 weeks is make or break.

Morgysmum · 15/12/2023 19:16

Go for it, yes there will be fines, but it's not her exam year. She will be able to catch up any missed work
She will have memories which cannot be made at school.

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/12/2023 19:19

TheaBrandt · 15/12/2023 15:57

Why is it “once in a lifetime” unless there’s some awful drip feed that she’s terminally ill. She’s 14 she’s literally got a lifetime to go. Taking 3 weeks out in year 10 or 11 is irresponsible. The school will flipping hate you too and it’s likely to cause stress for her on return, Daft idea.

I know! It’s not once in a life time!
most of us (myself included) had to wait until adulthood when we could fund our own trips to go abroad etc!
if you give kids everything on a plate, what does it leave left for them to strive for?!

SusanKennedyshouldLTB · 15/12/2023 19:23

Sallyh87 · 15/12/2023 19:14

I missed about 6 week at that age (due to I’ll health) and I was one of the top of my year. Also went to a good university etc and have a good career.

I don’t think 3 weeks is make or break.

The main complaint over and over again about the new gcses, which would be well after you time, is how content heavy every subject is. Three weeks would be 8 topics for my subject.

Welshmonster · 15/12/2023 19:24

Let dad pay both fines if she goes. It’s tricky as it may be a once in lifetime opportunity as my mum used to go to Florida every year for a month in February with husband 3 and adult disabled step brother as the warm weather helped my step brother. She offered for me and DS to go but I was a teacher and exhausted for half term and would be stressed about planning. Now my step brother can’t travel anymore and my kid will never get to Disney land. However it is GCSE year and it’s not fair that you have been made the verse of bad news. September in any year group is rubbish to miss as seating plans and friendships are sorted so daughter would be walking back into new arrangements and have a lot of work to catch up on. The school don’t need to provide work. Is she a strong student across every subject as if wobbly in English and maths then is it worth a resit.

the aunt could go in June or July once exams over but this is when American schools are closed so prices may increase.

again it’s not fair the burden is on you to decide

Cyb3rg4l · 15/12/2023 19:24

Exactly this. It’s a theme park not summitting Everest. Disney will still be there after exams!

Cocopops22 · 15/12/2023 19:35

Let her go she will love it ❤️

Macaroni46 · 15/12/2023 19:35

Jasnijade · 15/12/2023 17:33

Ask the school to give you the work she’ll miss while she’s away so she can work on it. I think you’ll be surprised how little there is.

If only teaching were as simple as just setting work 😂

bananamangoes · 15/12/2023 19:52

Not at age 14. She has GCSEs coming up

Okeydokedeva · 15/12/2023 19:52

Disney land doesn’t have to take weeks. She could go for a week and fly back as an accompanied minor?

adriftabroad · 15/12/2023 19:55

Its a shithole.

I worked there.

Threeboysadogandacat · 15/12/2023 20:14

I’ve never taken any of mine out of school for a holiday but honestly, the older I get the more I feel that life’s too short. I’d let her go and help her to catch up with what’s she’s missed once she’s back.

caringcarer · 15/12/2023 20:15

I'd say no, not during term time after just having 6 weeks off. It's really taking the piss.

Barkybarkynutnut · 15/12/2023 20:17

Let her go. Organise tutors for her return and warn her she ll be working HARD. I did a similar thing when I was young. It was amazing and I remember it to this day. And I’m a retired head teacher and current tutor for secondary aged pupils. It IS a trip of a lifetime! And clearly one out of your means. So take the opportunity

JANEY205 · 15/12/2023 20:22

I find the idea of 10 days at Disney so weird! What are they doing for 10 days?! I live in the US and people go for 7 days MAXIMUM. It’s overpriced and u wouldn’t want my teen daughter travelling around Orlando or flying home alone.

JANEY205 · 15/12/2023 20:24

adriftabroad · 15/12/2023 19:55

Its a shithole.

I worked there.

This is what I was trying to convey in my post. Orlando is really sketchy and I wouldn’t be ok with my teen daughter traveling to the airport or flying home alone. 10 days at Disney is really OTT as well. I hope OP is prepared for how much spending money to send :0

ExTrex · 15/12/2023 20:24

Let her go!! She can catch up on school work later, but this trip is about living life fully and fulfilling a small dream (big for her). I took my dc out of school last year for 3 weeks for a trip accross the world. It was worth it and no lasting harm done.

AllstarFacilier · 15/12/2023 20:32

As a teacher, I’d let kids go on holiday at any time other that year ten or above. We do Shakespeare at the start of year ten, and in three weeks they’d miss the a lot of the story but also the set up to be able to understand Shakespeare. I think it would be hard to get good marks on that paper while missing so much, and then obviously that will be in each lesson. However, if she’s bright enough and had the drive to teach herself, she’d be able to catch up. She’d have to take a lot of responsibility for catching up though and get revision guides/watch YouTube videos etc.

Bagpuss2022 · 15/12/2023 20:38

I would and I have a few times not done any of my children any harm the academic one still just got a first and is not doing his masters the less academic is a qualified plumber and the youngest we will be doing the same next year and I’m sure it won’t harm her.
the memories and the life experience and quality family time you can’t get that back

AllstarFacilier · 15/12/2023 20:41

PUGMEISTER21 · 15/12/2023 18:08

Missed a whole year during Covid. Just saying.

Remember that all kids were in the same boat there though, and exams were adjusted for all.

Souvenir81 · 15/12/2023 20:42

I have taken my kids last few days of term or one or 2 beginning to visit family overseas,etc; but no way I will take DD for 3 weeks at the beginning of year 11. DD prefer not to miss school