Things you've learned from this site

[Tueresmuyguapo]

According to recent threads:

Everyone over the age of about 35 looks way younger, constantly mistaken for younger, doesn't have a line on their face yet despite never using suncream, and their nan only used bin juice on their face and smoked 80 fags a day but had beautiful skin at 103 years old.

Everyone had sex with their complete stranger dp within about 4 seconds of meeting them for the first time, their dp moved in that night and never left and they're coming up to 762 years of happy marriage now.

Everybody on here seems to earn 200k in some mysterious job that doesn't seem to exist, they can't quite explain what they do, but they worked their asses off to get to this level of seniority which involves them working 3 hours a week for 2 weeks a year.

Interested to hear any more.

If you want to wax/shave your body then you are a disgrace to the feminist movement.

If you want to dress nicely and wear high heels. You are a disgrace to the feminist movement.

Start a thread saying. I would like to make my husband a nice meal...

Start a thread saying. I would like to buy myself nice underwear/make up.

Everything is a disgrace to the feminist movement and everything you do is becouse your mind is corrupted by men, not because you want to do it.

It really does give me anxiety and make me want to go nuclear

Everyone either lives in London or in some middle of nowhere village where the nearest shop is 30 miles away, and buses run once a fortnight.

That there are special places in Hell for every kind of sinner. I wonder what happens to those who end up in Hell for more than one transgression?

Do a early courtesy flush and those logs flush themselves with the second flush - no brush required.

Everyone on this site is mortgage free with a portfolio and dresses smartly for Christmas.

And the school run takes 75 minutes and cannot be achieved in anything smaller than a Land Rover Defender.

If you are not expecting anyone, why answer the door?

To see who it is.

Everyone was an absolute stunner in their 20s, men stared at them everywhere they went and they were constantly getting bought free drinks, as soon as they hit 45 their entire face melted and now they're hideous and decrepit.

Absolutely one understands the man they are in a relationship with, not to mention having no concept of what being treated badly looks like

But they can easily tell that other women need to instantly get a divorce based on one post

And it's 'through the roof'.

Driving for an hour on an unknown route - especially on a motorway - is a draining, anxiety-laden activity that shouldn’t be undertaken at all, and especially, twice in one day.

I like them too. Maybe there is a healthy reaction to a lot of 'hate the French' stuff that ignorant thickos post.

There was a letter on AskAManager (work advice blog) once where a SAHM was trying to move into the job field, and wrote this big screed trying to justify passing off various aspects of being an SAHM as career experience on a CV, so hiring and paying babysitters became HR duties and payroll, etc.

Do you ever see a post on Mumsnet and know that it's going to live rent-free in your head forever?

I can see - almost literally see - myself on Mumsnet in 2036 still quoting this.

That Lillie's and Poinsettias are poisonous for cats. Glad I found that out to keep my 2 cats safe.

Just thought of another mumsnet thing.

On mumsnet no one watches shit TV/fims. Its all artistic films/TV with subtitles. After completing watching they then have a three hour reflection with their dh discussing each scene and its point.

If watching with dc (who must be over 30, never 12 or under) you must pause at each scene and give life lessons to your little cherubs.

That some people, including people on this thread, don’t understand sarcasm or irony.

If you're a man and your wife gains a lot of weight/you no longer find her attractive then you're a selfish pig who doesn't deserve to be married, you obviously didn't mean your vows and you should love her no matter what she looks like.
If you're a woman and your dp has changed a lot physically, you're entitled to leave him for any reason you want, you should not have to be with someone you aren't attracted to any longer, it's no surprise you've got the ick, life's too short to stay with someone like that.

There are always old bangers in the private school car park- no-one has an expensive German car and everyone there goes camping in France for their main summer holiday.

Everyone scrimps and saves to send their kids to private school.

Different rules around money/ living together apply depending if you're male or female. Female - don't pay towards the mortgage unless you're on the deeds. Male is a cocklodger if he does the same.

And at least 75% of Mumsnet have anxiety (me included tbf)

Wives should take absolutely no part in doing anything, ever, for her husband's mother / sister / children / whatever as it is HIS responsibility and his alone.
Everything must be done as a transaction, with not a trace of nuance or human feeling.

Men whose hobby is cycling are deeply selfish.

These men with the mysterious hobby that always takes up the entire weekend and most evenings.

If your kid is being a little shit, they must have undiagnosed SEN.

Oh and if you're elderly parents/in laws are slightly annoying or dare to offer an opinion on anything, you must go no contact.

Irony means 'like coppery, only magnets stick to it'?