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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ticketed school event

103 replies

RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:16

Work at a school where have an event coming up that is ticketed due to health and safety. Despite there being limited tickets available, there were 2 tickets per family offered.

We've had a few parents asking for tickets but we've none left, some only wanted 1 ticket as single families/only 1 person available due to work etc. It seems a bit unfair that some kids have 2 people from their family coming to see them, others will have 0.

Now, obviously, there was never going to be enough tickets for every child to have someone there... however, would it not have been fairer to limit the tickets to 1 per family, as then there would have been more tickets available for the families who have missed out?

We just sold 2 tickets to one family this morning, then had a single dad come in an hour later asking for 1 ticket and had to say no.

On the other hand... Some guardians might need 2 tickets as need a carer to come with them to attend ? In which case it would also seem unfair to limit it to 1 ticket.

I suppose 1 ticket per child, unless there's a need for a carer to attend which would be a special circumstance for 2 tickets? Idk, is that intrusive? Probably

I guess we'd never get it right

YANBU - 1 ticket per family is fairer as more
families get a chance to have someone attend

YABU - 2 is fine

OP posts:
Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:17

Sorry, not just single families of course (was thinking of the dad then as fresh on mind), will also be only one parent available due to work etc who wanted 1 ticket.

OP posts:
JaneKatSuttonGoals · 08/12/2023 18:20

I haven't voted but surely you need to have 2 shows or whatever to ensure that everyone gets the opportunity to see their child.
If 1 ticket per child means everyone can get in then definitely do that and any extra tickets can be done on a lottery or something.

Topjoe19 · 08/12/2023 18:21

Why offer 2 tickets per family if there won't be enough tickets available for everyone? Or am I missing something. I'm a bit confused by your op.

Jinglingallthewaytochristmas · 08/12/2023 18:22

What’s the event? If it’s a school play they could do it twice.

spanieleyes · 08/12/2023 18:22

And what do you then do when you have separated parents, which one gets the ticket?
I agree though, it's a bit of a nightmare, whatever you do will be wrong! What's even worse however is when tickets are taken, the event " sells out" so we need to turn people away yet there are empty seats when people don't turn up. Could they not just return the tickets?

Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:23

Why offer 2 tickets per family if there won't be enough tickets available for every family

There wouldn't have been enough when offering 1 ticket per family! But, I think still would have been fairer?

Higher ups went with 2 per family and 1 show, I don't have jurisdiction here, just thinking, and maybe I could raise it with them for next year. Only 1 show.

OP posts:
Greenqueen40 · 08/12/2023 18:24

My sons nativity has 2 performances and there isn't enough room for everyone to have 2 people there. So I have one ticket for both so myself and DH can see him. I would be absolutely livid if I couldn't get one and some people got 2. It's completely unfair and needs addressing imo

Nineteendays · 08/12/2023 18:24

I’m a bit confused by your op. But if it’s a school play, there should be an opportunity for at least one parent of every child to attend imo. Especially if primary school.

MujeresLibres · 08/12/2023 18:24

Yes, they would be fairer. That's what our school has done.

Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:24

It's a Christmas show.

Take the point about separated parents... Could they alternate years? As you say, always be an issue... Perhaps need 2 shows to be sure.

OP posts:
Youthinkyoureuniqueyourejustastatistic · 08/12/2023 18:25

I think it would be fairer to say 1 per family until 2 days before the event - then any left over tickets can be sold to whoever wants them.
Give the people interested time to buy and then you’ve covered both scenarios/bases.
You can be totally flexible if someone has carer needs.

Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:26

I’m a bit confused by your op. But if it’s a school play

It's a performance by the children, 2 tickets available to each family of a child, 1 show, not enough tickets to go to every family. I'm wondering if it was fair to offer 2 if that's the case.

OP posts:
PurBal · 08/12/2023 18:28

Its not so much about the disappointed parents but the disappointed children when their parent(s) can’t come.

JemimaTiggywinkles · 08/12/2023 18:29

There needs to be at least two shows so every child gets to have at least one person attend.

Obviously it would be even better to have sufficient capacity to allow both parents to see the child, regardless of whether the parents are together or not.

Bobbinsbop · 08/12/2023 18:29

Dcs school has 3 performances 2 tickets per family at first and then first come first served for any spare tickets, and there is always spare tickets.

BlochAroundTheClock · 08/12/2023 18:29

Is this primary or secondary?
I think with primary particularly, parents are likely to loudly complain enough that you won't have to say anything. A primary school show which I couldn't get a ticket for?.. I'd seriously consider not letting child participate at all and tell the head why.

Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:30

I just couldn't help feeling sad for some of the parents who couldn't even get 1 ticket, while we'd sold some 2. Probably because it's a "Christmas" event as well, with the whole spirit of it thing. Just wanted to canvas wider opinions and ideas, I do expect some complaints tbf, probably will come through via email over the weekend.

Issue was last year it wasn't ticketed and we had far far too many parents show up we were over capacity, so to limit this year went with 2 tickets per family.

OP posts:
Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:32

Is this primary or secondary?

Yes it is primary event, and I think you're right regarding complaints. Had one parent who was with their child I had to say no to, both her and child looked crushed.

OP posts:
BlochAroundTheClock · 08/12/2023 18:37

I've got a feeling that decision is gonna backfire 😆 Crushed kids = we'll go and do something else nice as a family instead unless the head sees sense. I hope you don't get too much stick personally, it's not your fault x

SleepingStandingUp · 08/12/2023 18:41

Our school does two shows, £1 a ticket, two tickets per child (so if you've two kids in juniors, you get four tickets) then after the deadline, extra tickets are sold first come first served.

YourNameGoesHere · 08/12/2023 18:45

Gosh how inconsiderate of the school to expect all the children to perform but not provide the opportunity for them all to have someone come and watch!

As a previous poster said if I couldn't get tickets my child wouldn't be attending! I'd far rather we went for hot chocolate or something than them perform knowing I wasn't able to attend because of some ridiculous ticket policy.

The school needs to reevaluate their priorities.

Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:47

two tickets per child (so if you've two kids in juniors, you get four tickets)

Ours wasn't per child, just family, so even if you had 3 kids in the juniors you'd only get 2 tickets, which I understand because all the Juniors are performing together it's not separated by year groups or anything.

Another thing to suggest, might be better to split the juniors rather than one massive show.

OP posts:
MsChatterbox · 08/12/2023 18:48

If there's not enough space for every child to have a parent present then there needs to be more than one show. If I couldn't go to my son's show then he wouldn't be going (unless he really wanted to of course).

Soontobe60 · 08/12/2023 18:48

Where there are more children taking part than seats available, it would be better to put on 2 performances.

LlynTegid · 08/12/2023 18:50

Probably too late to do anything this year, but next year two shows or a split by age into two.

School cannot really prioritise one parent, much as you might want to choose the resident parent or exclude any 'Disney dads (or mums if there are any)'.

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