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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ticketed school event

103 replies

RooStreet · 08/12/2023 18:16

Work at a school where have an event coming up that is ticketed due to health and safety. Despite there being limited tickets available, there were 2 tickets per family offered.

We've had a few parents asking for tickets but we've none left, some only wanted 1 ticket as single families/only 1 person available due to work etc. It seems a bit unfair that some kids have 2 people from their family coming to see them, others will have 0.

Now, obviously, there was never going to be enough tickets for every child to have someone there... however, would it not have been fairer to limit the tickets to 1 per family, as then there would have been more tickets available for the families who have missed out?

We just sold 2 tickets to one family this morning, then had a single dad come in an hour later asking for 1 ticket and had to say no.

On the other hand... Some guardians might need 2 tickets as need a carer to come with them to attend ? In which case it would also seem unfair to limit it to 1 ticket.

I suppose 1 ticket per child, unless there's a need for a carer to attend which would be a special circumstance for 2 tickets? Idk, is that intrusive? Probably

I guess we'd never get it right

YANBU - 1 ticket per family is fairer as more
families get a chance to have someone attend

YABU - 2 is fine

OP posts:
Pineapplewaves · 08/12/2023 18:53

At DS school a lot of events are one adult only and no siblings due to lack of space. There are always enough tickets for each child to bring one adult. Most parents alternate, with one parent attending this time and the other parent the next.

Your event should have been advertised as "only X amount of tickets available and these will be sold on a first come first served basis". Your event sounds unfair, of course every child should have someone there. Can the event be held on more than one date. DS school often do shows twice on different days.

Cazaletto · 08/12/2023 18:56

What is even the point of the event if families cannot see their kids? Sad kids, no community connection, everyone pissed off.

Ours is a logistical nightmare because lack of space means each show is just one year group - so I’ve used up all my annual leave to cover 3 kids, but every family gets a chance to go.

Pipistrellus · 08/12/2023 18:58

Another thing to suggest, might be better to split the juniors rather than one massive show.

That would be obvious to me. One massive show would only work at a suitable venue with sufficient seating. Children should be able to have at least one parent there watching them. If their parents do not live together then two tickets is preferable.

Msgiggles30 · 08/12/2023 19:00

Wow I'm a teacher and we are doing 3 shows to ensure enough tickets for all. I would be devestated for my pupils if a family member/carer couldn't be there for them due to poor organisation on the schools part. To be honest there would be uproar with our demographic of parents and an extra show would be put on last minute 🙈

CrapBucket · 08/12/2023 19:01

This sounds ridiculous, surely the school has held plays before? It’s not difficult to count how many children are in the show, then times that by two, that’s how many audience seats need to be available. If that means multiple shows, you run multiple shows.

Tumbleweed101 · 08/12/2023 19:04

Honestly, if there was no opportunity for me to watch my child due to not enough tickets I'd probably not bother to take them, unless it is in school hours and they are already there. Could be a problem if main part children's parents felt the same.

Boomboom22 · 08/12/2023 19:06

Are your slt insane? Do all the actual parents of kids in the show get 2 guaranteed tickets? Otherwise all the kids with no parents there will be devasted! Unless they are not in the show?

OdeToBarney · 08/12/2023 19:11

Yeah my kid wouldn't be there if we couldn't get tickets. Wth were slt thinking???

Hotchocolate2023 · 08/12/2023 19:13

You need to make sure every child has rhe same opportunity for a parent there. Even if if just means 1

Coolblur · 08/12/2023 19:15

This is a problem that the school should be managing to ensure that all the children have the opportunity for a family member to come along.

At our school they do more than one show, two tickets per child. That way everyone has a chance to see their child perform, and it makes it fair for the children whose parent are separated. There are still people who complain that the grandparents/aunties/uncles etc can't come, but those people taking all the tickets in previous years meaning others missed out is why this happens now.

Zingy123 · 08/12/2023 19:15

What a stupid idea to not have enough tickets available. We had two shows for infants and two for juniors. If I didn't get to see my child perform I would have complained.

Ponderingwindow · 08/12/2023 19:17

Our school allocates tickets so that every child can have someone attend, even if that means multiple performances. Our school typically breaks it up so instead of being the whole school only one or two years is performing at a time so there is enough room for the parents. Yes, that means some parents have to attend multiple shows.

Hankunamatata · 08/12/2023 19:23

The morning thats gone on at our school because we have issued 2 tickets per family (can seat them all) and so many parents complaining as they want to bring both sets grandparents etc. You can never please everyone

Bearbookagainandagain · 08/12/2023 19:29

I don't have school aged children but if our future school does that, my children won't be one their Christmas show ...

MimiGC · 08/12/2023 19:32

There will be far more separated parents than parents who need a carer to accompany them. I'd say the latter would be pretty rare.

Anyway, it's ridiculous to have just one performance, most primary schools do 2-3 and that is for the benefit of the children, who love to see their parents in the audience.

YourNameGoesHere · 08/12/2023 19:50

Hankunamatata · 08/12/2023 19:23

The morning thats gone on at our school because we have issued 2 tickets per family (can seat them all) and so many parents complaining as they want to bring both sets grandparents etc. You can never please everyone

No one's saying you can please everyone though but this school hasn't even got enough tickets for everyone to have even one person come and watch them. What's the point in some of them even performing if the have no one able to come and watch not because they can't get time off but because they couldn't even get one ticket whilst some of their classmates have got 2.

Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 19:55

Unless they are not in the show?

All kids are in it in some way, there's lots of songs where ever child will be singing for example.

The only people who got guaranteed tickets were parents whose children were in the school choir

OP posts:
Thinkbiglittleone · 08/12/2023 20:20

School plays should always be put on with the children and their careers and parents in mind. Of course they want to see their children/grandchildren in school plays that's what they are all about and the kids want their special people there.

Put on more showings, especially now you are not allowed to bloomin record anything for others to see,

HardcoreLadyType · 08/12/2023 20:27

Have a lottery.

People could put in a preference for the number of tickets, 1 or 2, by a certain date. (If people need 2, because of a disability, etc, they need to put that on the application.)

Then, first tickets can be allocated, and 2nd tickets put in a lottery.

if people don’t get their application in by the due date, tough.

Some people might turn down their allocation, which can then be offered to those who missed out.

cakewench · 08/12/2023 20:32

The primary school I work in does two evening performances and one daytime one.

Doing more than two evening shows is too intrusive; small children get tired, it's quite disruptive to families to have to bring them in, chance of missing clubs (for the child or siblings), childcare etc.

However every year, parents are upset that they can only purchase two tickets, and what about [siblings, grandparents, aunties and uncles]? Staff do appreciate that it's difficult but really, unless we did an entire week's worth of evening shows, we just can't accommodate every adult and sibling that wants to attend.

That all having been said, your school's system is a bit extreme. I agree with you that if they literally have one performance, one ticket should be allocated per family before they start allowing people to purchase extra tickets. (Although you say you can't accommodate even one ticket per child at that performance. That's very risky. You'll definitely be missing some children that evening, and I'm surprised if you haven't had some complaints already)

NotEvenThought · 08/12/2023 20:43

What a shitty and stupid thing for the school to arrange. It's unfair on the kids and the parents/carers who can't attend.

Is it after school?

Is it a private school?

Jules912 · 08/12/2023 20:50

MimiGC · 08/12/2023 19:32

There will be far more separated parents than parents who need a carer to accompany them. I'd say the latter would be pretty rare.

Anyway, it's ridiculous to have just one performance, most primary schools do 2-3 and that is for the benefit of the children, who love to see their parents in the audience.

I took that to mean they had other children to care for. Our school has the two ticket limit, totally get why but often only one of DH and I could go as we had no one to watch the other child ( who we couldn't take as that would be 3 people). Two performances really helps with this as we each go to one.

UsingChangeofName · 08/12/2023 21:27

I've worked in schools, and been a parents of dc in different schools.
This set up is just ridiculous.

You can't put children in a show and then not have enough space for their parents to attend. Who on earth would think this reasonable ? Confused

You either have them all in the same show and the put on 2, or 3 shows or however many it takes, or, more sensibly, split the year groups.
Get Yr 6 doing an end of year show. Yr 5 could do something early in the Autumn, or around Easter. Yrs 3 and 4 could do the Christmas show.

Or, you only do the Christmas show once you are in Yr X (choose which is best) if doing 3 or 4 shows is too much.

Or, you just do a show with the choir / music group / dance group.

What you can't do is put children in a show but then not let their parents come. I can't believe anyone thinks this is okay.

Allfur · 08/12/2023 21:30

Can't people just stand

Original poster
RooStreet · 08/12/2023 22:14

Can't people just stand

It's not about seats, it's about health and safety and having exits freely available and all that that's why they've done it

OP posts: