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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect parents not to have child’s birthday party on Xmas Eve

375 replies

I88l · 04/12/2023 11:33

One of my daughter’s school friends has a birthday party on Xmas Eve.
i think the idea of inviting school kids to a birthday party on Xmas eve is pretty odd, because Xmas Eve should be spent with family.

OP posts:
Fluffycloudsfloatinginthesky · 04/12/2023 13:12

When my daughters were little I used to hold a Xmas party for their friends - pretty much everyone attended that was invited.

mammamummym · 04/12/2023 13:13

I think I'd be worried that nobody would turn up. But lots might. If we were at home that year I'd probably send my husband and enjoy the quiet to do last minute jobs. It would have to be early though. Afternoon would really eat into family time.

kernowpicklepie · 04/12/2023 13:13

ChocolateCakeOverspill · 04/12/2023 12:58

This makes me so sad. My son has never had a party because he was born on Christmas Eve and people want to spend it with family.

Even trying to organize something earlier in December is a waste of time because people are busy and after Christmas everyone is skint .

Edited

My DS was born Christmas Day last year 🤦🏻‍♀️ I've read a few people recommend doing a half birthday in June when friends could attend so this is our plan when he is at school.

Ohthatsfabulousdarling · 04/12/2023 13:14

My DDs birthday is on boxing day, I've heard that it's a family day so her friends haven't always made it to her parties which is fine, but what an odd notion that a child shouldn't celebrate their birthday on their actual birthday because it's a family day.

Her mum should've been more careful to not give birth then, I suppose! Eh!

Iwant2beJessicaFletcher · 04/12/2023 13:16

I'd LOVE for my DC to be invited to a kids party on xmas eve as it would help fill up the day and tire them out for bed!! YABVU

Seagrassbasket · 04/12/2023 13:17

Maybe it’s the kids birthday on Christmas Eve. What, she’s never supposed to have a party on her birthday cos it might inconvenience some people?

Just decline if you don’t want your DC to go.

evtheria · 04/12/2023 13:18

Twentypastfour · 04/12/2023 12:11

I’m sure we’re not alone in that we have a ridiculously busy December but nothing at all planned on Christmas Eve - which is always left completely clear for us to wrap things up - work, admin - and slowly clean, control DC’s excitement, just have a slow day. So actually, I’d probably be more likely to make a Christmas Eve party than one falling on a different December weekend.

I probably would decline the invite if my DC weren’t very good friends with the child in question or if the party was incredibly difficult to get to, but I wouldn’t mind the idea on principle and I’d be ok with DC going to a local party for a good friend.

December birthday are a pain really whenever they are in the month. Everyone gets so booked up. Maybe 24ths no worse than any.

Exactly all this, we'd be more likely to say yes to the 24th (kids' parties in the UK are usually just a couple of hours, anyway, so could easily fit in other things!) than any other weekend in Dec.

starsinthenightskies · 04/12/2023 13:19

I don’t see the problem 🤷‍♀️ You don’t have to go if it’s inconvenient.

We don’t usually spend Christmas Eve with family anyway so it’s not universal (no issues, we get on fine, we just don’t usually all get together until Christmas Day itself).

Fulshaw · 04/12/2023 13:21

I would go to a party on Christmas Eve. I think it’s a nice idea!

Saracen · 04/12/2023 13:21

Maybe they are hoping to have a small party without hurting anyone's feelings by not inviting them - same as some people have their wedding at a time and place which may not suit some guests. I would consider doing something like that if I wanted my child to have a small party.

strawberriesarenot · 04/12/2023 13:22

But what a lovely Christmassy time to have a party. I can't see the problem at all.

SouthEastCoast · 04/12/2023 13:23

A girl in my class in school always had a party the day before Xmas because that is her birthday. Was never an issue

stayathomer · 04/12/2023 13:23

Personally I find it odd and yes would think of Christmas Eve as either a family or laze at home day!!

billy1966 · 04/12/2023 13:25

They have every right to choose a time and day that works for them.

You have the right to decline.

Christmas Eve may not suit people but so be it.

Brefugee · 04/12/2023 13:25

there are dozens of reasons why a Christmas Eve party is a good idea, and probably dozens why not.

TBH I'd be ok sending my DC to a party on that date to get at least one out of my hair. And to use up some of the "is he on the way?" hours.

Maybe they're not Christian?

Maybe they said to their DC "sure you can have a party" then picked a date when they knew nobody would be able to make it, so they don't have to host? who knows?

Matilda1981 · 04/12/2023 13:26

I’d be happy to take mine to a party on Christmas Eve - would save me either stopping them fighting or trying to find something else to entertain them that doesn’t cost a million pounds!

bridgetreilly · 04/12/2023 13:26

Whatever this is, it’s not tragic. It’s really not a big deal. Go or don’t go, but no need to get all dramatic about it.

Doggymummar · 04/12/2023 13:27

My birthday is Christmas Day, I always had my party on Christmas Eve, plenty came

ApolloandDaphne · 04/12/2023 13:28

One of my best friends has a DC who has a Christmas Eve birthday. We all used to meet with the children at a local golf club in the afternoon to sing Christmas songs and await Santa bringing selection boxes then it was back to theirs for drinks, nibbles and cake. It was a fab way to spend Christmas Eve and the kids all burnt off their excess energy before heading home for bed. I think it is a perfect day for a birthday party.

Scruffington · 04/12/2023 13:28

I think it sounds like a great day for a kids' birthday party. The vibes would be 10/10.

Ponoka7 · 04/12/2023 13:29

I don't see the difference between that and going to a soft play/bounce place Christmas eve event.
Many people will still be in work and the children with other people.

Sugarfree23 · 04/12/2023 13:30

IDontLoveTheWayYouLie · 04/12/2023 11:40

How dare anyone have a birthday near Christmas!!!

Totally they should be banned completely no birthdays from December 15th to January the 5th.

Make my December's 4x easier!

madnessitellyou · 04/12/2023 13:31

Just decline if you're so opposed to the idea.

What happens when your dc is an adult though and has completely different plans. Do those days also have to be spent with you family?

Hobnobswantshernameback · 04/12/2023 13:33

I mean what was Mary thinking
How attention and seeking and needy of her
She should have been having family time not lazing around in a stable waiting for some wise men to pop around

Mummy3Plus1 · 04/12/2023 13:33

YABU.

My daughter's birthday is Christmas Eve so she always has a party the week after. It's really not nice for her to share her birthday with Christmas but we make the best of it. If this child wants a party on their birthday, good on them. If you don't want to go, don't. Judging them for inviting your child to a party is completely unreasonable.