Genuine weird thought since my mate’s granddad told me asylum seekers get housed in 5 star hoteos

[Libertyy]

What would actually happen if I, British born citizen, returned from holiday on a boat to bypass immigration and claimed to be an asylum seeker, would they even know? When would I expect my 5 star hotel 🧐🧐😏

5☆ hotels...outside in a tent with a really bug zip and lying on concrete in sub zero winter conditions.

This was Exactly my point!!! I’m so glad you got it. Hence I was talking about British citizens not anyone else. And the comment about my grandad someone made was sick as fuck

Aye that well known, laugh-a-minute, side splitter of a subject, asylum seekers in small boats.

Your grandad is wrong . They are housed in terrible conditions.
Your grandad sounds as though he reads the Daily Mail and Express.

Jeez collective mumsnet sense of humour fail here!!

OP is obviously poking fun at people who think things/ make claims like this- highlighting the absurdity.

YANBU OP. I think it’s the perfect plan for a luxury holiday experience 😉

Maybe the ‘small boats’ are luxury yachts too. 🙄

Meanwhile, in the real world…

Don't be silly, we've banned tents as they are far too luxurious a lifestyle choice

Bloody hell you can’t even make a light hearted post to joke and mock people’s stupid thoughts nowadays. It was clearly clear I was taking the piss out of my mate’s grandad like a lot of British people who think migrants get 5 star hotels, and to that poster who spectacularly missed the point - no need to mention my granddad

the mate's grandad isn't actually far off - have you missed the several months worth of protests about Stradey Park Hotel & Spa?
albeit it was 'only' a 4 star hotel
(obviously it's because it's the exception rather than the rule that it hit the headlines, but it's not a complete case of 'this would never happen')

Here's a lovely 4 star hotel I quite fancy

https://www.lincolnshirelive.co.uk/news/local-news/stoke-rochford-hall-hotel-near-8874183#:~:text=The%20Home%20Office%20has%20confirmed,illegal%20crossings%20and%20increasing%20returns.

She’s not laughing at asylum seekers in small boats. She’s laughing at people who complain that asylum seekers are being treated to 5 start hotel experiences! Definitely a group worth poking fun at.

Actually OP, yes you probably could (apart from the 5* hotels bit)

Cornelia Rau - Wikipedia

Read the bloody post, Jesus Christ….

God are MN posters really this gullable? It's clear the OP was taking the piss out of her friends granddad.

OP what country were you educated in?

---

Sometimes they use hotels that were beautiful luxury hotels when they were built but have long since become run down shitholes. There’s one near me that dh and I used to amuse ourselves reading 1 star Trip Advisor reviews for. Things like ‘I found a human turd in the lift!’
I really feel for any refugees that have been put there; they probably haven’t even given them rooms with sea views.

Don’t worry OP some of us got it. Clearly there are a lot of mumsnetters lacking a sense of irony.

Hang on has someone turned up like ‘they do put them in four star hotels actually’

this is all superb stuff

Literally this!!!! I thought it was obvious I was highlighting how stupid it was because it obviously doesn’t happen like they say it does. Nothing wrong with poking fun at certain thoughts that are so ridiculous it obviously ain’t true

Very poor choice of subject matter for a supposedly light-hearted thread!

https://www.itv.com/news/anglia/2022-11-03/refugees-put-up-at-four-star-country-hotel-as-government-block-books-rooms#:~:text=Neighbours%20said%20the%20asylum%20seekers,Apologies%20for%20any%20inconvenience.%E2%80%9D

I get what the thread was supposed to be, I just think it's in incredibly poor taste to joke about hopping on a small boat considering people die this way all the time.

https://www.cambsnews.co.uk/news/4-star-cambridge-bar-hill-hotel-to-house-up-to-272-asylum-seekers/7998/

That's alright if it’s not received how I meant it, I don’t mind if mumsnet delete it.