People moving out of cities but wanting all the things that a city offers

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Messages go something like this;
Hi, my husband and two kids and I are moving out of our one bed flat in x city and would like to find an area we can afford a four bedroom detached house. It MUST have great transport links to a neighbouring city, a thriving home Ed community, vegan bakery, great Lebanese food, a variety of brunch places and cool live music venues.

But that's why we all live in cities?!! There is no magical semi rural place with all the nice, cultural bits, jobs, facilities, public transport with cheap houses.
City life isn't for everyone so you either compromise on space or location. If you move out to the suburbs or the countryside then you know that you will no longer have those things in walking distance.
This is not just on mumsnet but in real life too. I work in a much cheaper area, bits are nicer, there is more green space but it's just not worth giving up the job opportunities, museums and like minded people you get in a city. My friends that have moved out have changed their whole life styles, more driving, more countryside, more meals in chain restaurants in retail parks, I'm not judging it at all! As someone who can barely afford to live here, I can't afford to eat out at all so all the new, cool pop up street food places are wasted on me anyway. But I still love being here.
AIBU

I also live in a commuter village in the East Midlands and didn’t have to go to London. All of the London benefits are a 10min drive away. I do think there’s a bit of inherent racism in the East Midlands in where people choose to avoid Indian areas but often these are the safest (and closest to the city, with the best schools, and the ones with the best growth in property prices).

Well, if my DM is anything to go by,everything. She moved to Australia in the late 80s and was continually moaning about the heat and the humidity in summer, and I'm like 'mum, it's Oz.' Thinking, 'why didn't you ask the relatives already out there what it was like with 40 degree summers and inadequate air con?'

There are pros and cons to everything. The trick is to work out which area works best for you on the whole, and accept that those areas might change throughout your life. We can't have it all.

YANBU. I think this works the other way too. I live in a big city renowned for its thriving cultural scene and night life. Barely a week goes by without a story in the regional paper about someone who has bought a city centre flat in a buzzing area full of amazing bars, restaurants and gigs, and then immediately tried to get the nearest music venue shut down because of the noise or taken a restaurant to court over the sound of their extractor fans.

Mind you, there’s also a lot of people on Mumsnet who buy a house in a leafy suburb with good primary schools and are then furious that they can hear people’s kids playing in gardens or people having family barbecues.

Oh, and let’s not forget the people who choose to live in areas with an economy driven entirely by tourism and then moan about the presence of tourists. “I live in a beautiful Grade I listed thatched cottage which has been in my family for 12 generations, on a narrow cobbled street in the centre of a stunning village that is also a UNESCO World Heritage site. AIBU to annoyed that people sometimes take photos?

We live fairly close to an airport.
There is often complaints about plane noise ....but almost the entire town leaves to go skiing in half term, I'm pretty sure the airport works quite well for them then!

Everyone's complaining that the larger 3 beds have gone up to over 250k

@10HailMarys I never complain about tourists in Bath (although Xmas market time isa nightmare) because that's why we have nice things!

@Bandolina that sounds like Orkney.

Were you actually living in Kinshasa and not realise it?

‘You pays your money and you takes your choice’ if you are privileged enough to do so. If you live in a city you can easily go to the countryside for a break and if you live in the countryside you can easily visit a city. I prefer the latter …

I grew up in the suburbs. I know what it's like. I think the problem is a lot of people I'm talking about have grown up in cities and don't know what the suburbs are like. It's not just some oasis of cheap houses, there are compromises with that. Your Frugi clad children will draw attention, you won't be able to get mesa harina or nutritional yeast in your local Tesco and the majority of people will not be as interested in Montessori preschools, wooden toys or other quite niche things as you.

How are you defining surburbs though? There's practically no cheap housing in my suburb. It's a very desirable and generally wealthy area where you will find niche ingredients in the local supermarkets and exactly where you'd expect many Montessori and wooden toy loving families to live.

@IHateWasps anything that's on the outskirts of the city. Something like this that if you picked up and moved into the city centre would be worth £150K more.

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/139276442#/?channel=RES_BUY

Orkney has a shop that is essentially a vape shop which sells other stuff nobody buys.......

Yeah, I love these kind of posts/conversations. I have a variation of it with my DM regularly. It goes something like this:

DM: I couldn't live where you live! The traffic is awful and it's so expensive.
Me: Yeah, I know - they're the worst things about living here.
DM: I'd miss the countryside too much, the open skies, etc. How can you live in a city?
Me: Because I have everything here - shops, restaurants, live music, theatre, public transport, three major roads nearby, three airports in under an hour's drive, exercise classes, a lovely running group - I wouldn't have any of those things where you live.
DM: Oh yes, you're so LUCKY having airports nearby. When we want to go anywhere we have to drive at least two hours to get to the airport.
Me: Well yes, but I have the bad traffic and the expensive houses, remember.
DM: Oh yes! I couldn't live with that ...

And so it goes, round and round

@IHateWasps anything that's on the outskirts of the city. Something like this that if you picked up and moved into the city centre would be worth £150K more.

I definitely live in a suburb even by your definition and it's one of the most expensive areas in my part of the country. Especially the neighbouring town. You pay a premium to live there. Even more than the vast majority of the city centre. And as mentioned it's exactly the sort of place that will attract the Montessori and gooseberry and cinnamon yoghurt crowd. Suburbs are not all one homogeneous mass.

Villager here.

I tell you what gets my goat.
People saying their (posh) pocket of London is 'like a village'. Dulwich village is not a village. Muswell Hill is not a village. Wimbledon is not a village.

My village has a church, a pub and a postbox. The neighbouring village has a community-run shop and a nursery. The one further on has the primary school (under 100 kids), and another little shop with post office. The nearest train station is 6 miles away, trains stop once an hour or so. The nearest bus stop is 2 miles away.

If I moan about anything, it's that I am never able to have a 'second glass' as it's an expensive taxi ride home (£30 minimum). But I moan about that 98% less than I moaned about being a sardine with smelly people on the tube touching you in 5 different places when I lived in London.

I mean it is a little bit affected, but those places did actully used to be villages at one time. Although you'll notice only very posh, very white places in London affect the name of village.

I don't pay rent, I'm a leaseholder. And my 2 bedroom leasehold flat is valued at about £100k more that Rightmoves average price for a semi in Manchester.

2 courses and a glass of wine

DM me this place please!

The interesting thing about Manchester and areas around it (and I know it well) is that any area I would pick to live in (and there aren't that many) are not that cheap at all for a decent house - be it rented or bought- so many gravitate to the same few areas, which keeps the prices up somewhat. It's really not cheaper than moving to places like Frome, Stroud, Chippenham, Canterbury, Norwich etc. You always get people saying 'well move to Manchester'. Whereas in reality if it's all about house prices it would be more realistic to say' move to Newcastle/Leeds/Liverpool or other bits of Lancashire, Staffordshire, Yorkshire, Tyneside ' etc

@Ginmonkeyagain Yes, it definitely works the other way around too. We have new neighbours (in London). We both have a garden the size of a stamp and she noted how it was "awkward" that she once saw me sitting in my garden reading a book... and that I could see into her garden and at some of her windows. If you want privacy you can't live in Zone 2 in London - just be grateful you have a garden!

But then again literally no one cares in the city, which I love. I fully embrace the anonymity of the city.