People moving out of cities but wanting all the things that a city offers

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Messages go something like this;
Hi, my husband and two kids and I are moving out of our one bed flat in x city and would like to find an area we can afford a four bedroom detached house. It MUST have great transport links to a neighbouring city, a thriving home Ed community, vegan bakery, great Lebanese food, a variety of brunch places and cool live music venues.

But that's why we all live in cities?!! There is no magical semi rural place with all the nice, cultural bits, jobs, facilities, public transport with cheap houses.
City life isn't for everyone so you either compromise on space or location. If you move out to the suburbs or the countryside then you know that you will no longer have those things in walking distance.
This is not just on mumsnet but in real life too. I work in a much cheaper area, bits are nicer, there is more green space but it's just not worth giving up the job opportunities, museums and like minded people you get in a city. My friends that have moved out have changed their whole life styles, more driving, more countryside, more meals in chain restaurants in retail parks, I'm not judging it at all! As someone who can barely afford to live here, I can't afford to eat out at all so all the new, cool pop up street food places are wasted on me anyway. But I still love being here.
AIBU

I'd he to be aw from all the stuff you mention which is why I have to live in a city! I think people are very unrealistic!

I know 2 “I can drive but won’t and we live rurally.”

Where?!

Where?

YANBU. But it’s worse managing people who work in a city but moved over a 100 miles out for massively cheaper house prices. Yet they still want the inner city pay but don’t want to pay the price for commuting and will use any excuse to try to work from home. 😡

We don't want them in Bristol thanks. I live in a town 9miles from the city centre. No railway, no real bus service. One road in and out. All they do is moan about it, inflate housing costs and want pop up food, over priced artisan bread and coffee shops.

But the biggest bug bear...they don't like the local accent. So no one in the media locally has one, haven't for years. (Ok one local radio guy as a Bristol accent). The travel people can't even pronounce the place names correctly. Gordano becomes go-dan-o and as for horfield!

The culture has been replaced with a Londoners view of what the West country should be. In my town in North Somerset, that's North Somerset, we have a recreation of a Cornish fishing village. Birmingham is nearer than the nearest Cornish village.

YANBU & I say that as someone who lives rurally and can’t drive

when I moved here I knew it meant life would change, that was the point of moving! If I still wanted the things I had when I lived on the outskirts of London I’d still live there

Hi @Elvis1956 , from Portishead? Me too, ha ha.

I grew up in the suburbs. I know what it's like. I think the problem is a lot of people I'm talking about have grown up in cities and don't know what the suburbs are like. It's not just some oasis of cheap houses, there are compromises with that. Your Frugi clad children will draw attention, you won't be able to get mesa harina or nutritional yeast in your local Tesco and the majority of people will not be as interested in Montessori preschools, wooden toys or other quite niche things as you.

@Elvis1956 haha! I'm a Bristolian so know exactly what you mean, all moving out of the inner city to... Backwell! Or Yatton!!

We have this a lot. I live in a seaside town in Lincolnshire with (very sadly) a lot of lonely widows who don't drive.

They and their DH sold up down south, and bought a little bungalow by the sea - unable to believe HOW cheap it was! What tends to happen then is that DH dies first, and he did the driving. They are now left in an area with no hospital, no bus service, no shops, no friends and nothing to do.

I do wish people would consider what might happen.

Bucks

There were lots of articles about this last year - people who had moved away in 2020 when they realised they could wfh, but then realised there was often a trade off for cheaper property - that things are more inconvenient or you spend more time/money driving to places. And after a winter in suburbia or a village they decided they wanted city life again.
I have a colleague who likes living in a village (they've moved a few times) but they don't drive and are usually reliant on lifts to a station. If they can't get a lift there is a bus that takes about half a day, but however they arrange it they are very rarely on time for work!

Yes the people who complain there's only one bus every hour. Well of course, you don't live in a little village for the good transport links 😂

@Hatty65 tjat stuff happens so often doesn’t it. I always say to people move to the country when you’re still active; when you get old & frail you need to be in a city

Oh yes. Have read several real life experiences (usually from the Guardian or Observer) of folk moving out of London to a village or small town and then bemoaning the lack of 24 hour a day taxis, lack of takeaways, cool venues etc . . .

Also where I grew up is a small town an hour away from a city where a lot of city people would come out for weekends/holidays etc . . . . I used to work in a shop and you could always tell the customers who were from that city - used to demand why we didn't have this obscure product you could get everywhere in the city, and had a few instances where when they paid by cheque (yes I'm that old) and put their address on the back, they often wouldn't put the suburb or other details and be genuinely surprised when I asked for them, as everyone knows where that street is! Um no we don't.

I thought it was well known rural shops charge more - they are operating completely different margins and business models.

Seen many posts by MNers surprised by lack of delivery options rurally.
Confuses me.

That’s not just villages though. I live on the outskirts of one of the bigger towns in the area and there’s less than one bus an hour. Public transport is just crap outside a few major cities.

I was guessing Nailsea, but I think you might be right!

There's a place in Bristol called Gordano?

I shouldn't comment really. There's a town in Stirlingshire called California. And Dallas, that's in Moray.

My bugbear is when people move from the city, or worse buy a holiday home, and then do all in their power to change things for the worse for local people. Locally we’ve had people buy here and then tried to start petitions to ban the local fishermen going out early coz it wakes them up…the mind boggles. The fishing boats having been going out at the same time for generations!

I'm surprised at the lack of try before you buy attitude. Whe DH and I moved out of London we took the train out of London to see how long the journey took if that was to be our commute. And added on time to get to station etc etc. Looked at what facilities /shops were there. Ruled out places that necessitated driving everywhere.
3 work colleagues moved further away from work and either expressed surprise at a) how much it cost to commute or b) how long it took or c) wanted to change their hours because it meant leaving so early. ....but why would you not suss out that stuff before buying a house?

It's one reason we live in Bath and not the half the price places 40 minutes away - we do have all these things listed but we do pay for the privilege- our rent isn't far off London prices- we've just got a better house - and 4 beds

There are places like this- I would say Brighton, Guildford , Bristol, bath in the south , - all have nice countryside and good facilities -- none are remotely cheap -

Ditto @Hatty65 the highlands of Scotland

I live in the countryside because I can’t live without it, but it sure is inconvenient. I long to be able to walk to the shops or the train station.