Working on christmas day, the entitlement of others

[Mysticcatmum]

I have a job in a 111 NHS call centre, the office is open 24hrs 7 days a week. I have just been given my Christmas rota and to my delight I have been given off Xmas day (which I have worked previous years).

Now I have had an influx of colleagues who have children, asking me to cover their shifts since 'I have no children'.

So, my question is, AIBU for thinking that I do not (apprantly) deserve to have a christmas off with my family (who have had a rough year) all for the sake of those who have children, who have been off previous years?

laughs in public sector

And it isn't just for those 5-6 "magic years", I would get asked to cover because "little Timmy is at Uni and only home for a few days in the holidays" so I should "be kind" so they could spend time with their precious offspring. Never mind that "Little Timmy" is 21, 6ft 4 rugby playing adult who is only free for that week because he's planning on pissing up the rest of his holidays with his mates, and is mainly coming home to save money, get fed & get mum to do his washing.

Well clearly Timmy is an adult. No different from any of your colleagues wanting time off to be with family. Everyone is someone's child. many people have said they want time off to be with their parents. Would that make them entitled too if they asked?

Yes, little Timmy is an adult, who doesn't work for the employer in question. Why should anyone other than his own family give a fuck about him?

Yes I think it would be entitled to ask/bother when there’s a rota system in place designed to be as fair as possible to everyone.

I'm a childless 60+ widow who desperately wanted children.

I come on Mumsnet for a bit of company (pathetic, I know) and because I like conversations and debates.

Urgh can we just cancel this post/poster please. So nasty.

Yes Little Timmy is an adult, but "he's my CHIIILLLDDD" would be trotted out, often followed by comments starting "as a parent" and "well you wouldn't understand, not having had kids".

And that's where the difference lies. You don't get pressure "as a carer" or "you don't understand, you've never had caring responsibilities" for those with sick or disabled family. I don't get told "you wouldn't understand" when it may be an elderly relatives last Christmas. Those people tend to ask politely, and don't act like it's their right for you to swap, and it rarely goes on for years and years.

Not pathetic at all, @WearyAuldWumman - and I love your username. It sums up my life perfectly.

It's the people who expect you to work Christmas, they days in between and New Year's Eve! It's really only 1/2 years when they are questioning it you really need off. Up until year 3 we just picked a day for it to be Xmas which was a day we both had off. Year 3 we swapped it off as DS was questioning. Year 4 he knew the truth. Now we will work it if we can have new year off but people want that aswell!

I also don’t believe shops if any description including garages should be open either Christmas or Boxing Day so people can't travel to see loved ones then? No public transport, and no access to fuel either? I might be able to fill up the day before I need to travel, but how do I get home again?

You also assume everyone is religious - there are plenty of people in the UK who are happy to work Christmas because it's not a special event for them. Especially if there is double pay on offer (sadly not often the case anymore).

You're really going to use a whole tank of petrol between late Christmas Eve and the morning of the 27th?

I would if I was working Christmas Eve and 27th, depending on traffic. It can take half a tank just to get to my mother”s house, then I have to get back again plus any driving to see other family I do while I’m there.

Thank you.

Easily! Approx 300 miles to Cornwall (where family live) then 300 home again Boxing day. That's more than a tank of petrol in my car.

I can understand people thinking Christmas Day, though I'm sure parents who find out relatives who have bought the children battery operated toys but no batteries would think differently. Also people who have some food related disaster (dog/cat steals the main meat).

But I don't understand why ALL shops needs to be closed on Boxing Day? It isn't a religious day at all. Maybe you're thinking of shop workers having a well deserved couple of days off, which I also understand TBH, but suggest this and you get screams about people "needing" to go to the Boxing Day sales (which were New Year sales when I was younger).

Actually 26th is the Feast day/St Stephen day. It is a religious day

Definitely not pathetic. I am childless, not through choice. But I like MN as it's interesting seeing other people's opinions.
Don't like smug parents making me feel sad.

I like people without kids being on mumsnet - stops us being in our bubble.

If you were offered Xmas day off this time, its yours. Its rude to ask as you wouldn't book it if you didn't want it.

Oh wait... if someone gets a payrise maybe they should give it to my colleague the one who adopted a kid with special needs, if this is the new system of 'worthiness' or the one taking care of her disabled mother.

When I approve any holiday requests I don’t consider whether they have children - it’s not relevant.

In your rant, you missed the "since you don't have kids" part in OP which makes 90% of what you have written redundant.

@Sauerkrautsandwich no, not missed that bit. That was part of the OPs making her colleagues out to be dicks. She clearly thinks her colleagues are dicks and she’s perfect and doesn’t really think there was any chance of anyone saying she was unreasonable.

Her colleagues didn’t say that they thought she wasn’t entitled to Christmas off. They asked her about a swap. As my colleagues often do because we look after each other. We don’t go on mumsnet and complain about our colleagues wanting a life outside of work in the same way we do.

Some people prefer new year off anyway. Totally reasonable to ask the question.

Enough people here attested to being asked to swap because they have no kids (many even said they simply don't get off because of that). There is no reason to believe that OP just added that and colleagues didn't say it. Because it's actually very, very believable and quite a common occurrence.

Totally reasonable to ask to swap. Totally unreasonable to ask to swap "because you don't have kids". Especially since op worked it the year before.

Sounds like someone is butt hurt because their colleague refused to swap.

Ok I’ll allow garages on Boxing Day to open. No shops though, especially the likes of Next opening at 5am.

I don’t assume anyone is religious. I don’t care if they are or not. It’s a national holiday going back to pagan times. Except for very essential services no one should need to work. It’s what makes it different.

@wesurecouldstandgladioli nope. Never, ever, ever have I felt hard done by regarding swaps.

I’d be really saddened if a colleague felt that they couldn’t ask me for a swap, because they thought I’d go bitch on mumsnet about it. I’ll always try to help if I can and usually I can.

I don’t believe I have colleagues like the OP.

@Sauerkrautsandwich it’s not clear what the colleagues said to the OP, but it sounds to me like she’s trying to make them out to be unreasonable when they never said they expected her to work because she doesn’t have children. It’s implied but I think she is just implying this to justify her post clearly wanting everyone to say how brilliant she is and how dick-like her colleagues are. She doesn’t state this.

So OP, what did your colleagues actually say to you? Did they say “you should be working christmas cos you don’t have kids. Swap with me.”