Working on christmas day, the entitlement of others

[Mysticcatmum]

I have a job in a 111 NHS call centre, the office is open 24hrs 7 days a week. I have just been given my Christmas rota and to my delight I have been given off Xmas day (which I have worked previous years).

Now I have had an influx of colleagues who have children, asking me to cover their shifts since 'I have no children'.

So, my question is, AIBU for thinking that I do not (apprantly) deserve to have a christmas off with my family (who have had a rough year) all for the sake of those who have children, who have been off previous years?

Not childfree/childless fault though so why should they be the ones expected to bear consequences?

I agree. It's not their responsibility to step in, and I think only those who are prepared and able to work Christmas day should work in industries which operate on christmas day.

But if someone comes along and then calls them lazy for not sorting childcare, aim going to ask what childcare exactly could they possible sort?

Surely the single parent should have thought of and planned their childcare before taking the job?

What childcare could they sort with a year's notice? That is seriously a question?

It's Parenting Basics to have Plan A, B and C lined up, esp if one is single. Who would watch the offspring if they were in hospital?

Advertise on Next Door. Check commercial agencies. Inquire at local churches & mosques if anyone is interested in babysitting. Make friends with other parents. Hire an au pair. Talk with nursing or other students who may need to earn cash. Ask at nursery. The list of things a resourceful person can do is a mile long. Exert some serious effort!!!

Don't foist the issue onto employer and co-workers.

Also NHS staff- I have young kids. I volunteered to work Christmas Eve /Christmas this year (albeit nightshift). I’ll still be able to see the kids opening their gifts when I get home from work and spend time with them. Just because someone doesn’t have children, doesn’t mean they don’t have family or a partner they wish to spend Christmas with.

Who would watch the offspring if they were in hospital?

Childminders babysitters emergencies nannies. All available.

Usually these are unavailable on christmas day.

We could say this about anything in society though right? Why should the childless have to pay for childcare services? Why should the employed have to pay for the jobless? Why should able bodied people have to give up seats for the disabled? We organise resource according to need, because that’s how a society functions.

@Tandora You are confusing the taxes/ dues we all pay and share across a civilised society , for our mutual benefit, with a penalty expected of an individual, childless employee with no benefit/ return.

The first is generally based on an idea of fairness and equality. The latter is discriminatory to the childless.

Nope - if you want Christmas off, find a job where you don't have to work Christmas. Also if you have kids, save up your "getting people to swap" for when your kid has the flu, so school/childcare is out the question and your elderly mum would have the kid, but might die from the complications of flu. That's when you NEED your colleagues to do you a favour, not for a day that you can celebrate another time just as easily as anyone else.

@Parker231 I'm sure if you think about this a little, you'll realise why it's a silly thing to say

They might have become a single parent while doing the job, through bereavement or partner being crap/sick
They might not have much choice about what job to take

I don't know how you plan childcare for Christmas, if you don't have family who would take your kids, it's hard if not impossible to find anyone else who would have them, I imagine. Not to mention the impact on a child of being away from loved ones on Christmas day

So someone else should give up their Christmas plans? You would discriminate against other employees?

DH is a doctor and missed many Christmas’s with our DC’s. On the years he wasn’t scheduled to work, he would not have swapped with someone else.

I disagree there is such a distinction . I don’t think we pay taxes just to benefit ourselves. We also do it to redistribute income and allocate resources according to need (eg the rich pay disproportionally higher taxes, people who are infertile or who will never have children pay for childcare etc)

I’m a GP which means I get Christmas off every year (yay! And one of the reasons I chose this specialty). But I remember how it used to be as a junior doctor.

I’m not sure this is personal or about you not having kids, I think people are always going to ask about swaps with whoever is rota’ed to be off, because Christmas is important to people (let alone there can be problems with childcare/travel etc) and there are some people (particularly people without kids and/or who are eg. Muslim or Hindu etc) who are genuinely fine with working over Christmas and will willingly swap shifts. There will always be people looking for swaps, and there are sometimes people who are happy to do it. You don’t ask you don’t get. All kinds of complicated negotiations can occur lol. I’ve definitely agreed to cover a whole week of nights in exchange for having Christmas Day off before etc.

But it’s totally valid to say no for any reason at all, and you are of course just as entitled to enjoy a Christmas Day off when you are rota’ed for it as anyone else. You shouldn’t be feeling pressured into swapping because you don’t have kids.

But does that mean that childless/child free people, or people whose children are grown up, will never want to spend Christmas with their nearest and dearest, and should have to work every Christmas Day, @Tandora?

YANBU. When my youngest was a baby Christmas was whatever day I did have rostered off. When she got older and understood dates I explained I was needed at work to help people, I worked emergency services call centre. Now she understands that my job means I sometimes work Christmas. My first Christmas off with her was when she was 10 years old and even then I was approached and asked to swap

No, but I do think there is a basis for prioritising single parents with no options for childcare.

You know what the difference is??

Disability is an involuntary misfortune. People don't choose it.

Those who have children out of wedlock, or with a dodgy, absent or non-existent partner, or when they don't have sufficient resources (money, nearby family, friends, etc.) have CREATED the adverse situation by conscious choices. And then expect the rest of us to pick up the pieces.

As to childminders not being available on Christmas Day, what a crock. A quick google search turns up numerous options.

There is no such thing as "no options." People who claim they have no child care are taking the piss; they have 11 months+30 days before Christmas to source someone or something.

It always amazes me that more responsibility is expected from the child free colleugue than the child/childrens OWN FATHER!!!

Oh fgs I hate this kind of argument and it’s as offensive as it is silly.
ok just for those women who were raped then please? And maybe we should remove disability benefits for those who arguably became disabled after making reckless choices about health and safety?
such a load of nonsense.
We are a society. children are part of society and an essential one at that.
benefits and resources should be allocated according to need.
end of.

Who picked the father? Maybe women need to be making better choices.

Childfree and childless are not just some resource to be allocated to help parents

You wnat reaources allocated campaign for employers having to provide and aupport and not just by making people without kids giving up their own time

The parent that stays and puts the graft in always seems to still get the blame.

So I’d assume you’d fully support someone with children being forced to work every Christmas if they happened to have a colleague that was a carer for an elderly relative that couldn’t easily find cover?

Or would you say that it’s only fair everyone takes turns?