Does anyone else hate xmas?

[grinchapparently]

I don't like Christmas, in fact I totally dread it.
I used to love it as a child, but now all grown up it makes me feel more alone.
It highlights that I have no family around or who care, it throws in my face that I should be happy when I'm not, and I constantly get bombarded on social media pictures of happy families.
(I do know I shouldn't look)
But seriously why is it thrown down our necks?! Heat xmas radio has literally been an option since pissing September. ( i flick through it).
Every time someone mentions xmas or I hear a xmas song I get a lump in my throat. I literally dread this time of year.
Is it just me?

I don’t hate Christmas OP, but I totally get where you are coming from. This Christmas will be the first without my Dad, last Christmas was the first without my Mum - they were both over 90 when they passed which helps me deal with it, but it will be strange.

In the midst of recent loss, I received my annual invite to host a stall at the local primary and have agreed to go ahead with it. I figured the reindeer deeley boppers and the happy little people would be a tonic.

I’m with you about Christmas kicking off too soon. When we lived in the US, most of the festive stuff didn’t make an appearance until after Thanksgiving. I think that was a good restraint.

I'm so sorry @Goldenboysmum

I Don't hate Christmas I just don't like it and don't do it not done it in years.
When my children was in their teens they had no interest so one year we said we would go Xmas free. It was the best Xmas we had no faffing had steak and chips done our own thing no forced enjoyment no gifts just a normal day.
We never looked back.

Their adults now and still don't do Xmas they both work on that day.

To much faffing i see people doing a Christmas shop like the world is ending shops are open on boxing Day you know.
The parent trying to out do the next.
Christmas dinner it's just a Sunday roast with extra veg.
Buying gifts for family we don't really see all year.
I could go on.
I don't do any of it no decs nothing just another day to me.
I spend my Xmas day giving my home a deep clean or I go on holiday.
Its the same for all holiday for me I just don't do any.
Easter I can get chocolate all year round.
Valentine's Day I can say I love you and flowers all year round not just one day.
Halloween what's the point.
Every one to their own but it's just not me.

I'm like you @rockinginarockingchair . Christmas is buying about 3 presents during the year, writing a handful of cards, posting them, and that's it.

It's still nice, I still enjoy it, but the expectations are pretty low so it's not the anti-climax that it would be if I felt it had to be the Best Christmas Ever.

I've felt very "meh" about Christmas for many years now. Even worse since my Dad died in March 2021.

I'm fine on the day with my family around and we go out to a local restaurant for Christmas dinner so that's fine. I hate the run up to it though. Actually, I think I am just not a fan of this time of year at all. Short days, long dark nights etc. I just don't like it. I want to hibernate and wake up around the end of January.

I really long for the days when perhaps DH and I could go away on holiday for Christmas and New Year. Somewhere warm and light. Maybe the DDs could come with us if they want to or can. That time is not yet though.

I am aware that my issues are minor compared to those who have lost relatives and children though, especially if it happened at Christmas time. You all have my sympathy there.

It used to be a magical time when you had been looking forward to getting something that you’d longed for all year, in this age of mass consumerism and instant gratification more and more people buy what they want when they want so the feeling of anticipation doesn’t exist, for me that’s part of why the magic has gone

i Once spent Xmas alone. I had always dreamed of doing so but in reality it was awful. The telly is obsessed with happy families - all the adverts etc. it is really quiet and I felt isolated in a way that I never had. I live alone and never felt like that before. I went out for a walk and it was all families and kids playing with their new bikes etc. what’s worse the day seemed to stretch on and on endlessly. It was a relief when it was over.

This.

During Covid lockdown it was like Xmas every day with Amazon deliveries virtually every single day.

For me the best part of the lockdown Xmas was when people took to walking around outside and I got to say hello to neighbours and friends.

I do not hate it but I do not get as excited as before. My family is all over the world and very expensive to travel for those dates. As I have to stay home I rather travel abroad later and get some sun rather than spend money in presents and expensive food.

Like you, I loved Christmas as a child, my parents made it so magical! But as an adult I've grown to dread it because it just leaves me feeling sad and lonely because I don't get to join in the magic.

I don't have any children, not by choice, and I'm single, so I don't get to be part of the magical Father Christmas aspect of it, and Christmas is the time I feel hurt by infertility the most. If you have kids, you cannot imagine just how many times people feel the need to comment on how Christmas is really for kids.

My siblings do have kids, and live away. I make a point every year of inviting the whole family to spend Christmas in my home, but because of the hassle of travelling with kids they have never once accepted the invitation. My parents also (obviously) choose to spend Christmas with their grandchildren. So this means I have never been the "host" for Christmas, and I realise hosting is not for everyone but it's something I dream of doing.
I either travel to them instead and spend the time on a sofa or tiny spare box room, or stay home alone.

Throughout December I am proactive in arranging lots of fun social activities with friends, I love to go out. But invariably, more often than not, friends drop out because their kids are sick, or they can't get a babysitter, or their partner is sick, or they've realised how many presents still to buy and need to shop instead, or they are so tired from meeting so many people and could we meet in January instead (when I know they will cancel again due to lack of money).

So, yes OP, I get you. It can be a lonely and difficult time for some people.

I really understand OP. I felt exactly the same way as you for years and years. I've often felt very alone at Christmas and dreaded Christmas Day because I had nobody to share it with. I think, through my late teens and 20s, I spent about 7 Christmas days on my own.

I'm married with kids now and I try and make it special for them. The loneliness I used to experience has given way to stress and I find myself exhausted, particularly the week of and the week before Christmas. What I'd love to do is go abroad for a couple of weeks, somewhere really hot with a beach and sod it all off.

When I say it will be my first Christmas alone that's not quite true. I spent most of last Christmas alone, other than a brief visit to my DF, which was awful as he wasn't well and in fact died a month later. The rest of the day I was alone and honestly, it was the best Christmas I've had for many years. I don't care about seeing families and kids, I never wanted kids, and I don't want a partner. Christmas here is in summer, which might make a difference - I imagine it might be a bit bleak in winter being alone. As I said, Christmas is what you make it, and I intend to make it enjoyable.

I loved it when the DC are little. They are now 20 and 18 and although it's lovely to be together the magic has gone.
It brings home a lot of realities. My parents are dead, neither made it to 70, I'm NC with my sibling and so we spend every Christmas with PIL who rattle on and on trying to do everything as cheaply as possible, whose idea of Xmas fun is drinking warm Vimto and serving two £1 Morrisons cheesecakes for ten.
When the DC have families of their own, DH and I will probably spend it abroad.

I don’t like it. The glutinous consumerism that triggers so many people to go into debt rather than ‘fail’, the impact of all that on the environment. The hysteria about having everything perfect and the dysfunctional reaction of many when things are not like those of the families in the Christmas films. The loneliness of many, the distress of those who are feeling more profoundly the loss of loved ones through death, estrangement etc, because it’s Christmas. The increased use of alcohol, with the associated increase in domestic and street violence. All of this leads to me disliking Christmas. As you can tell I’m a fair bit ‘Bah humbug’!

I send you a hug @grinchapparently

My son and I are both neurodiverse and the sensory overwhelm, change in routine and consumerism is all too much.

I love new year (after NYE!) New beginnings, fresh calendars to write in, the anticipation of the year ahead. The cold, bleak time that Jan weather brings!

I have found Christmas easier to deal with by reducing the amount we spend and leaning into the religious meaning. I know that's not for many but I adored going to Midnight Mass last Xmas eve.

I'm also moving to a later tree and leaving it up until epiphany. I personally can't stand the Christmas tree up in November and down Boxing Day!

I have kids so still have to mark the run up to Christmas, but could you have some warm lights and candles, and celebrate the new year too x

I've never been a fan of it tbh and been called Scrooge and all sorts!
I do like the food ( just a posh roast , but makes a change )
Don't mind new years as we don't do anything and less pressure. Just nice to be off work

I love it, but can obviously think of many reasons why others would not. Christmas isn't just for familes though. There are lots of festive things you can enjoy alone.

I hate it too OP, but for opposite reasons. I have too many people pulling me in every direction and I get really stressed and overwhelmed. But its more than that, my reaction is excessive and I get a bit down and emotional and really really exhausted. I respect that its important for others and its part of our culture, but unlike any other cultural things its everywhere 100% of the time. I don't know why some shops or restaurants don't just decide to not do it. I can't be the only one who avoids certain shops because I can't cope with the Christmas music. I also hate the wasteful rubbish sold in shops, marketed as gifts or stocking fillers.

Would you mind naming those solo festivities?

It's the annual bore, but the evenings slowly are starting to get lighter so that's a good thing.

I do, have hated it since I was a teenager. I'm autistic & the change of routine does my head in, I mentally cross the days off until Boxing Day is over. The only saving grace is the World Darts Championship is on over Christmas to keep me sane.

I hate Christmas too. I've hated it ever since my parents broke up when I was 12. After that my Mother's family were extremely controlling over my Mother and I rarely saw my dad. I think it stems from that.

Same here. I hate the run up to Christmas.

I dislike the commercial crap that starts earlier and earlier (saw a totally cringeworthy inflatable cartoon reindeer the height of a house in someone's front yard yesterday).

I have always hated that it's in summer here in Australia. I would like to have experienced a sort of Dickensian Christmas.

The whole "it's all about the children!" thing irritates me, especially since that boils down to yet more consumerism.

I don't actually hate it, just find it tedious (especially having to hear crap songs in the supermarket) and irritating.

I am very grateful I don't have to spend it with my sister and sit through Love, Actually ever again.

It can be avoided to a certain extent.

I generally ignore it. When I was teaching it was a great day to get marking done as people leave you alone.

Get plenty of things to watch on TV. Do all shopping online. Plan a couple of things you like, whether it is a bubble bath, taking a dog for a walk or reading a book.