to never buy anything from this store again?

[Cupcakemum79]

Last weekend my husband, daughter and I went shopping for winter coats. I was really looking for a nice trenchcoat or ideally a woollen winter coat.
We walked past a luxury brand store that is known for really nice coats. Husband knows I love their coats and suggested we went inside. Normally I wouldn't even consider buying such an expensive clothing item, but husband insisted that I try on the coat I liked. He wanted to treat me if I ended up loving it, as he said it was a timeless item and he wanted to buy a nice Christmas/birthday gift that he knew I'd enjoy for years.

We asked the shop assistant for a size up in the coat I liked. It just didn't fit very nicely. Shop assistant then suggested I try on a couple of other (much more expensive[ coats. Those were really straight fitting coats though and I told her I preferred the other coat because it had a waist belt and didn't look so baggy.
She then told me "that coat maybe it was for you 20 years ago, now it's not for you".

My husband and I found this incredibly rude, but were too shocked to say anything. It ruined the shopping for me though, so we left immediately and husband told her that we didn't want a coat anymore. He was really angry. I am now 44 years old and tried the size 14, which fitted but pulled across the chest. Surely that's not incredibly old or fat to deserve a remark like that? Also what's with the '20 years ago' I really don't even look that old!

AIBU that I found this incredibly offensive and also I think that had I looked really rich she would never have said anything like that? Also I really don't want a coat from that store anymore...

Bloody rude and you were right not to buy anything there.
I had similar a few months ago when I was looking to buy some new hiking trousers and a couple of tops.
I live in another country where a lot of people are of smaller build than me. I need larger trousers than most but I'm not in the plus size range.
I went into one shop and started looking at the trousers. The sales assistant came over and looked me up and down and said "I'm afraid you won't find anything to fit you here. Companies don't make hiking trousers that large"

What the absolute fuck!!! There were several pairs in my size and larger in fact.
I picked up a couple of pairs and said to her "Well they would fit and those ones as well, but I won't be buying them from you now. What a shame - I have €300 to spend today on hiking clothes so I'm going to go home and order them online".
At which point she said "Buying online puts stores out of business".
I just walked out. I wanted to say "Insulting customers puts stores out of business".. but couldn't be arsed at that point.

So yeah, I went home and bought trousers from a couple of online stores and they did fit and were in fact the same trousers and sizes that the woman had in her store.

Surely if they op and her husband were both offended by this then they were offended and just because someone else would ‘shrug it off’ is by the by.

There are ways of saying things, this assistant needs to learn some diplomacy and tact to be honest. right how I’m hugely overweight I feel like crap, feel like I look huge and awful in all my clothes, a comment like that from someone I don’t know would’ve really upset me. We can’t all just ‘shrug’ stuff off, it’s quite insulting to assume because it doesn’t bother you it might not someone else. My mum has an amazing figure at 70 she looks great and wears really nice clothes, better than me. She is also quite horrible re fat people, she’s never been fat and equates putting on half a pound to being 4 stone overweight and wonders why I get pissed off with her. No tact some people just haven’t got a clue.

You said you were 50 upthread.

Indeed I did, thanks! i am between those ages do not want to give away my exact age. I must intrigue you though for you to go ahead and start scrutinising my posts. Please do punish me though for the shameful 2 year age discrepency!!! If this is a 'gotcha' it is absolutely hilarious, as people change minor details on here all the time dont they to prevent identificaition.😂😂

*SiousieSoo · 06/11/2023 14:41

Wow why would your husband write a complaint? She just said honestly that she thought it would not be suitable for you today compared to 20 years ago. She did not insult you she just expressed an opinion. I cannot understand why you would not just shrug this off but instead, be so fuming to write a complaint. It has no bearing on anything important in your life. There are thousands of places you purchase a coat from. I find this quite bizarre*

Not too sure why you find it hard to grasp. Op was asking the Sales Assistant for the next size up. She didn’t ask for her opinion or thoughts on whether the coat suited her or not.
Her opinion was ageist. Although why a trench coat would be not suitable for anyone whatever their age shape or size is beyond me.

As a SA you can guide a customer if they ask for your opinion otherwise it’s up to the customer to decide

I think buying a winter coat is a biggish deal as it is something that needs to last a few years as a good quality one is an expensive item and if you don’t travel door to door by car then you need something that will keep you warm and dry for quite a bit of the year

I take it you have never shopped in France 😂

You're right, it's supposed to be a classic coat for ages, not one for skinny fashion victims.

it definitely is chavvy if it’s noticeably burberry pattern

The brand definitely hasn't recovered in general. Chavtastic is the word.

I think you have misunderstood. At no point did I find anything hard to grasp in the OP. I simply did not agree that the shop assistant was rude.

I had always wanted to visit and buy from the LV store. I saved up and planned my visit.
they were horrible in there,made me feel like an inferior customer.
I bought my item but left the store and burst into tears,they had been so nasty.
I wrote and complained,they offered me to return to store for a personal shopping experience, I told them I would never set foot in another of their stores for as long as I live

Reminds me of a shop called Marshall and Snelgrove, (no longer in existence), in Birmingham where the assistants looked down on us if we went in wearing our school uniform. They couldn’t see beyond their snooty noses that one day we could be high-spending customers.

Surely It's faux Burberry that's chavvy?
I'm no 'Chav' expert but no 'chavs' spend £700 on a scarf?

Yes that’s rude and I also would not shop there .
I once approached an expensive make up brand with a view to buying foundation and eye shadows .The assistant said , before you start looking I would point out the lowest point product is xxxx£ . In other words I looked like I could not afford the items .

I took my business and the cash ( plenty of it ) in my pocket elsewhere.

I'm way over the usual Mumnet age, a granny, and sometimes buy expensive clothes in Knightbridge. A good sales assistant will show you what you want and suggest other things if you don't like them, it's a pleasure to spend your money in these shops.
It's hard to think of any clothing that would suit women of all ages better than a simple trench coat, I have a Burberry myself (have had it since my 20's in fact) and still happily wear it.
The OP's sales assistant was a cow, even if she didn't personally think that the OP looked wonderful in it there are ways of suggesting she try other garments and really she was intolerably rude. However it's unlikely she didn't look good in such a classic coat, though she might have needed a larger size.
I don't hesitate to ask a good sales assistant (in Harrods for example) whether what I'm trying looks OK and I've never met anybody so unpleasant and unhelpful.

I’ve worked in retail for over 45 years and would never have spoken to anyone like that! What a rude bitch! I’d of come back with a comment to her myself, hope you have found another nice coat and enjoy wearing it

Perhaps there are people on Mumsnet who likes their shopping experience to include a touch of masochism? Buying clothes isn’t nearly as much fun unless some anorexic twat is telling you how fat and old you are…

Regardless of the brand, that would be a serious complaint to their Head Office from me. That remark is totally unacceptable.

Those stores always have snooty shop assistants who think because they work there - that they are special and if you don't look a certain way / dress a certain way - you don't belong there! I always remind myself - that regardless of how I look or dress - I am in their store because I can afford it - and that they work there - they don't own the store even though they may behave as if they do! We went into one in Paris once and the model like shop assistant looked down her nose at me...... but she didn't know I could have bought every display bag in her store and then some....... so remember you were there with a lovely husband who thought so much of you as to want to buy you a coat you liked! And as for being 44 - oh to be that young again!!! Ignore her....... you have better things in your life which can't be bought!!

Well done to your husband. I was making millinery for a posh shop back in the day and an assistant told a customer, 'You're in the wrong shop, we've nothing in your price range. Have you tried BHS?'
A sales assistant is supposed to assist sales. I hope that woman gets a rollicking.

Nobody deserves that comment, even if they are “fat or old”

im glad your husband complained though

also, ya, that’s a known chav designer brand, you dodged a bullet.

Yep I've been into all the fancy department stores (Harrods/Fortnums/Harvey nicks) and Tiffany ogling the jewellery and always been encouraged to try on the expensive jewellery - even when I've said I can't afford it

They always say a version of 'pfft, neither can I but you might be able to some day' and smiled

@Shadowonasun your post took me straight back to 1980s Poland, when everything was behind the counter and you had to ask for it. I asked to see a leather jacket and the woman refused to let me try it on because she said it wouldn’t fit me!

In such cases, I look them in the eyes and ask how much they earn a month. I bet they cannot afford even a fraction of the coat by their monthly salary. Then I just say nope I don’t like the item — will check [the rival brand] instead!

Can't see a link to the trench/coat in question can you share OP?

But looking a all online no coats scream young person only to me.