Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not want dog in my house?

78 replies

Holly1212 · 05/11/2023 20:33

AIBU to not want dog in my house?

Me and my partner live together with our DS.
When my partner invited his dad over for dinner etc he brings the dog with him. We do not have any pets and I do not want the dog in the house. We have light cream sofa and carpets and I do not want the dog in the house as his dad allows him to run all through the house.

It has got to the point where I do not want him to invite his dad over as I know the arguments that will be had by the dog coming over. I will admit I might have OCD but there is dog jumps up everything. I also do not like that his dad feels the dog at our house from our plates and forks. Things like that turn my stomach.

I have tried to be out my case across why I do not want the dog in the house but I am made to feel like this is normal that you must bring a dog to someone else’s house. I have tried to be reasonable and say he can come but put in kitchen or dining room as this has wooden flooring. There are all the promises but after 10 minister he is jumping on everything in every room. One of my main annoyances is that the dog tried to eat or play with my little ones toys so when he comes I have to put most of his toys away.

I am already feeding Christmas as I know the arguments which will come.

Am I being unreasonable here?

OP posts:
1990thatsme · 05/11/2023 20:36

I am a big dog lover and my dogs are part of my family. However, YANBU as it's your house.

What does DP say though? It's his house too so...

justalittlesnoel · 05/11/2023 20:37

Nope not unreasonable. Don't need that mess in your house! Tell him to leave the dog.

Gymmum82 · 05/11/2023 20:38

Yanbu. Dogs wouldn’t be coming in my house. If someone turned up with one it would have to stay in the car or garden

readingmakesmehappy · 05/11/2023 20:38

Your house, your tiles.

readingmakesmehappy · 05/11/2023 20:38

Your rules, even! Though I'm sure you have lovely tiles Grin

Original poster
Holly1212 · 05/11/2023 20:39

Thank you. He says I am being ridiculous and that it is normal for someone to take there dog to a house. Even when I try to explain I do not want a dog and try to keep the house spotless as this is why I do not want a dog in the house he says everyone takes there dog to peoples houses. I do not know anyone else who does.

OP posts:
Ibravedaflood · 05/11/2023 20:39

Agree if the ddog stays behind a baby gate or not at all. We have 4 ddogs. Never take them visiting people! Is your dp scared of his df?

NopeNotMe1 · 05/11/2023 20:39

YANBU. I have and love my dog but absolutely wouldn’t take him to someone’s house if they didn’t want him there. I would go without him but may not be able to stay as long.

Bedbynoon · 05/11/2023 20:41

No way, all the germs and hair and saliva over everything! I do not blame you, would never allow a dog into my home.

fearfuloffluff · 05/11/2023 20:41

Meet in a dog-friendly pub and only have him round in the summer, when the dog can stay in the garden with the rest of you?

BitOutOfPractice · 05/11/2023 20:41

I am not in the slightest like you in that my home is not spotless or cream. It’s clean and tidy but I’m not that worried about it.

I also do not want dogs in my house.

vodkaredbullgirl · 05/11/2023 20:42

I wouldn't take my dogs with me to someone's house, unless we were all invited.

SiennaMillar · 05/11/2023 20:42

YANBU. It’s your house.

I have a dog and if I couldn’t take her with me for a long day away at someone else’s house, it would prevent me from attending as she can’t be left alone that long. Sadly, that is the compromise with dog ownership. Luckily, people want me to attend badly enough to put up with my dog!

Boomboom22 · 05/11/2023 20:42

No way, it is disgusting that he does this without your agreement. If your bf doesn't get it ltb.

SoIRejoined · 05/11/2023 20:43

Get a cat, then say he can't bring the dog!

Dacadactyl · 05/11/2023 20:43

Absolutely no way would a dog be coming in to my house. Yuck.

I'd be feigning an allergy if I were you.

Catsmere · 05/11/2023 20:46

SoIRejoined · 05/11/2023 20:43

Get a cat, then say he can't bring the dog!

He sounds like the sort of idiot who'd insist on bringing his dog anyway. I had friends many years ago whose cat was killed in that situation.

betterangels · 05/11/2023 20:47

Absolutely not unreasonable. Several of my friends have dogs. They leave them at home when they come here because they're not rude and assume things.

I'm not crazy about dogs and don't want them in my pet free home.

Appleofmyeye2023 · 05/11/2023 20:48

I’m not a dog fan. But family members who visit regularly have dogs. They know I will accommodate them for visit under my rules. Dogs only allowed in main open plan room where there’s hard floors, no jumping on sofa or furniture, they have a water bowl I fill in the utility room, they can go out in garden in certain area for pee but poos musts be picked up, taken home (not in my bins) and are poo deposited washed with hose and copius water

they always control their dogs around our meals and food, absolutely told to lie down and leave us to eat.

And, most importantly , ALWAYS ASK me if it is ok to bring dogs. They never assume, they thank me as well for being accommodating.

some people are entitled. You are absolutely not unreasonable to say no.

Catsmere · 05/11/2023 20:48

This sounds like a very poorly trained dog (or rather, not trained at all). If you can't stop stupid FiL bringing it, have you a back yard to put it in? Or would he object to that, too?

Original poster
Holly1212 · 05/11/2023 20:50

I have tried but good dog will not go in garden alone.

OP posts:
Kittycat43 · 05/11/2023 20:50

@Holly1212 we have a dog and would only take to one house whose occupants we go on holiday with and also have a dog who knows ours.

obje · 05/11/2023 20:51

For all those saying "your rules, your house" - I presume it's a joint house. What about her DPs opinion or does "your rules, your house" only apply one way?

Frequency · 05/11/2023 20:53

obje · 05/11/2023 20:51

For all those saying "your rules, your house" - I presume it's a joint house. What about her DPs opinion or does "your rules, your house" only apply one way?

I was just going to say this.

I think you need to find a middle ground. The dog can come but stays on a lead, maybe?

It's not fair to DP to ban the dog and effectively ban his father from his own house.

Original poster
Holly1212 · 05/11/2023 20:53

It’s not that it is one way. Something like this should be a joint decision and I do not get a say in that decision the agreement is between my DP and his dad. I have tried to offer solutions but like I stated after 10 minutes these are broken agreements. I do not like or want a dog in the house.

OP posts: