Halloween rant

[Mannerscostn0thing]

Am I being unreasonable to expect that if you elaborately decorate your house for Halloween that at least one adult should stay in the house to hand out treats (or leave some in an honestly box)?
In my area last night so many houses had signs up saying 'gone out trick-or-treating'. It's an affluent area and these houses have spent a lot showing off, just not participating!

I stayed in, with my dodgy pumpkin and home made decorations, and missed out on the fun to hand out treats. I was rewarded with groups of 6-12 children trying to push their way into my house for treat, waving their hands like the Zombies in Shaun of the Dead trying to get into the pub! Their parents, in equal numbers to their children, stood at the end of my drive watching.

I'm sure some on here will tell me to chill out but just as on the other AIBU thread today (about not one person thanking them for giving up their time to coach) I have to ask are we really such a selfish society now that we only care about our own children being excited and enjoying themselves and don't give a stuff about others? If you decorate your house to participate in Halloween, shouldn't you participate in Halloween? Why do ALL the adults need to be out? Surely it's 1 adult per group, 2 at a push?

A couple of examples that I found upsetting:

1. DH saw one group of 8 parents with their 10 - 12 children return from trick-or-treating, go into a house and replace the sign from 'gone trick or treating' to 'out of treats'.
2. I had a group of 'Tweens turn up with pillowcases no less stuffs full of sweets. I then saw them getting into one of their parents car and driving off to the next house.

Is this what Halloween is now self, self, self. Next year maybe the DCs could hand out treats to the parents who stay in! I think I’ll join in the fun too and will be carrying a very large box of eggs. So if you are reading this and are one of those people then beware. After all it is called 'trick or treat' for a reason!!!!

We went out but left a tray of sweets and some lit pumpkins.. 1 dc made us laugh. .. We knocked and he answered and said Sorry We Are Closed!! Made our night!! Some dc are just grabby, greedy buggars..

Fuck me, chill out and have a cup of tea!

That's some serious level of stress you're causing yourself over nothing.

I was unfortunately not in last night for trick or treaters.

I was running a Halloween party for children elsewhere over the prime hours. Both my own children were with friends.

I don't leave sweets in a honesty box as experience is its emptied by the first group of children unfortunately.

Sorry If I appeared antisocial last night. I can't be in three places at once!

Nope must just be bad luck. I stayed in to dish out and DH took ds out guising.

Hardly worth the bother is it

I don’t think an adult needs to stay in to hand out sweets as both DH and I wanted to enjoy it with the kids but I do agree about either being there for some of it or leaving a box of treats. My DC opened the door for about 30-45 minutes then we went out at 6 leaving what remained for people to help themselves too. That felt like the right balance and is what most people in our area did.

Lordy. Really, if you don’t want lots of kids knocking or to stay in, just don’t decorate.

we left an honesty box once, and when we came back there were a few notes saying "thank you" and some sweets left over.

I have to laugh at 'leave some in an honesty box' 🤣

Clearly said by someone who's never stepped outside of their 'naice' area 🙄

I'm not stressed at all. Had a lovely evening with friends and their DCs after they'd all finished. I just don't understand when Halloween became about holding private parties and adults having a get together. It used to be about children dressing up and knocking on doors and everyone on the street doing their bit for each other. Obviously things have moved on and it's acceptable to not be in and let your children knock on doors with their arms outstretched without muttering a word. I now understand why less and less people are bothering. Shame.

You do realise that some people are single parents, right? Can we not decorate our houses for our kids to enjoy? Or if we do, do we have to stay in and make them miss out on trick and treating just to make you happy?
Ffs.

Surely they decorate because they want to not because they are staying in?

We used to enjoy going out as a family. Now dc have all left home and I live in the middle of nowhere so don’t get trick or treaters anyway.

Yes, I do realise that but I'm talking about large groups of children turning up with large group of parents, rather than just 1 or 2 adults per group.

I mean yes someone should stay in to greet the guisers but I can't imagine being annoyed if someone doesn't.

I just don't understand when Halloween became about holding private parties

It's fun and a nice excuse to see friends. I'm not sure why it bothers you.

Yes, I do live in a very, very nice area, which is why these people can afford to do this but don't!

I'm with you. I refuse to take my son trick or treating however I decorated the house and was ready to hand out sweets to the ungrateful little buggers who not only didn't bother saying 'Trick or treat' they also didn't say thank you.

Next year I'm leaving a bowl outside and saying don't knock, baby sleeping. If some greedy sod takes them all then sadly that's it.

I really couldn't get mad about this😂

I'd wait for an answer and if there wasn't one move onto the next house, no biggie.

Maybe stay in next year if it upsets you so much?

I did stay in. That's the point.

It's always been acceptable not to be in!

If they want to take their own kids T&Ting then it's always been acceptable to do that.

It's never been either/or.

I stayed in, with my dodgy pumpkin and home made decorations, and missed out on the fun to hand out treats.

Do you always like to martyr yourself or is it only for special ocasions?

My kids went out trick or treating. My dh was at work. I was at my grandmothers house- she has dementia and I was worried she’d get callers. It’s not always possible for people to be at home for trick or treaters

Just Mumsnet. It gives the vipers something to get their teeth into.

People see it as a social event 🤷🏻‍♀️ maybe they like doing stuff as a family with the dc and seeing other parents.

YABU, I did a bit of trick or treating with the kids and then was back by about 6 to hand out treats to anyone who knocked after that, I don't see why my decorations have anything to do with it, I can't be in two places at once and DH was working late!
YANBU about the rudeness of some kids though, which did annoy me. I always tell my kids to only knock at houses with decorations/ a pumpkin, say trick or treat, take one thing, and then say thank you. While most of the kids who came around were like that, a few weren't and it really irritated me, especially as my 6 year old DD was excited by the knocking and wanted to hold the sweet bowl, and some rowdy teenagers bowled over and grabbed handfuls off her, even after I'd said 'just one'. She was nearly knocked over! I put up the 'no more sweets' sign after that, put kids to bed, sat down on the sofa and ate the rest myself!