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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think most female prisoners are sad rather than bad?

123 replies

Hereinthismoment · 31/10/2023 20:00

Watching Time. Obviously I’m saying most and some will be bad. Some will be sad and bad. But it has always seemed to me most are likely to be really vulnerable. No expert though.

OP posts:
Hereinthismoment · 31/10/2023 21:37

not all women are victims and some are actually just nasty criminals who deserve jail time

Well, yeah Confused No one has said otherwise.

But many - not all - will be deserving of pity, many - not all - will be victims themselves, many - not all - will not have caused injury or harm to any individual directly and some not even indirectly.

And the above can apply and someone still go to prison. After all, there are what - two/three women with whole life orders?

OP posts:
Hereinthismoment · 31/10/2023 21:39

if a single dad went to prison I can imagine the same end result

Well yes, and if there were an equal number of single mums and dads that would be a fair point, but there aren’t, not even close.

OP posts:
Londonscallingme · 31/10/2023 21:40

icewoman · 31/10/2023 20:07

most prisoners are sad rather than bad. males and females

This

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 31/10/2023 21:40

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 21:25

Do you ever comment on the Daily Mail articles you read?

I genuinely can’t believe you don’t care that some women are coerced into offending because they are threatened with rape, or because stealing is preferable to prostitution. You are one of life’s absolute gems.

My family is far more important to me than some random criminal. Would you be so understanding if your mother was attacked by someone even if they said they were coerced?

User135644 · 31/10/2023 21:41

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 20:34

I did a bit of time earlier this year in a large women’s prison. And I am a woman. The charges against me have now been dropped (another very long story).

OP, I couldn’t agree more. I was disgusted by the incarceration of some of the women. Significant learning disabilities, high end neurodivergence, years and years of grooming, serious chronic mental health conditions. That was at least 75% of the women I met.

Yes, some real “wronguns” but by and large, they needed to be in treatment, rehab, or hospital. Not in prison. We are not reducing the risk of reoffending in these populations, we are making it more likely by removing their housing, support networks, childcare structures and so on.

Of course, it’s not a fashionable view but the women’s estate isn’t oversubscribed like the men’s so it’s easy enough to dismiss it.

A significant percentage of male prisons see a high intake of mental health issues or learning disabilities.

People whom would historically be in mental institutions roam.the streets and are sent to jail, often with drug addictions.

Mrsjayy · 31/10/2023 21:42

Newtonianmechanics · 31/10/2023 20:03

I agree years of generational trauma. Of course there are exceptions.

There is obviously exceptions but yes I agree and think many women end up in prison because of trauma.

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 21:43

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 31/10/2023 21:40

My family is far more important to me than some random criminal. Would you be so understanding if your mother was attacked by someone even if they said they were coerced?

Just to help with the comprehension, most women are not in prison for violent offences. Theft, shoplifting, possession, fraud. None of these involve beating up my dead mother or breaking into her house. If you want to be taken seriously, you need to do your research on why women are in prison.

BigFatLiar · 31/10/2023 21:43

I suppose what I mean is it’s easy to imagine a scenario where children live with mum in social housing and she goes to prison and the home is lost and the children go into care and all the resulting chaos from that, whereas if dad goes to prison while no one is suggesting it isn’t horribly upsetting it isn’t disruptive in quite the same way. And most single parent families are headed by women: I don’t think anyone could argue with that.

You don't think that if children live in social housing with their dad will be taken into care if he goes to prison?

NotEnoughTime · 31/10/2023 21:43

Slinging someone (male or female) in prison over and over again doesn't work. This scheme can help some prisoners from re offending.

https://theclinkcharity.org

I can personally confirm that they make very nice meals 😋

Home

THE CLINK IS NO ORDINARY RESTAURANT Our restaurants are situated within working prisons and all of our food is lovingly prepared and served by people in prison. Find Out More

https://theclinkcharity.org

HighlandCowbag · 31/10/2023 21:43

I know 2 women who have gone to prison.

One was a very troubled woman who actually came from a large but nice family, 1 of 10, the youngest of them. She had 7 children of her own, 3 different fathers, was a drug addict, had her dcs removed (eventually), went to sex work to fund her habit and bounces between prison, and halfway houses. Non violent crime, shoplifting etc.

The second was a friends of my younger dsis. In prison for her role in murdering an old man to rob him, committed in a town centre, with another drug addict.

Drugs are evil. Some women are evil. Some women are victims of men and end up taking drugs because of men seeking to control them in some way. Some women are just evil in the same way some men are. But more men cause women to be in prison than what women cause men to be in prison.

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 21:44

User135644 · 31/10/2023 21:41

A significant percentage of male prisons see a high intake of mental health issues or learning disabilities.

People whom would historically be in mental institutions roam.the streets and are sent to jail, often with drug addictions.

Absolutely but:

this thread is about women.

there is a far wider range of options for male offenders/patients/remand prisoners.

User135644 · 31/10/2023 21:47

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 21:44

Absolutely but:

this thread is about women.

there is a far wider range of options for male offenders/patients/remand prisoners.

Women on average are far less likely to get jail time/the same time for the same offence as men.

NImumconfused · 31/10/2023 21:48

icewoman · 31/10/2023 21:35

don't be daft, no one goes to prison for not paying their TV licence

You can't be jailed directly for not paying your TV licence, but you can be jailed for not paying the court fine you get for not paying your TV licence.

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 21:51

User135644 · 31/10/2023 21:47

Women on average are far less likely to get jail time/the same time for the same offence as men.

Your statement adds no value. There aren’t multiple options for women so they get lumped together. There’s no broadmoor
option in the south of England. Women who desperately need treatment will get suboptimal mental health intervention in prison. Because the provision simply does not exist in the quantity that is needed.

Hereinthismoment · 31/10/2023 21:52

I’ve answered that @BigFatLiar

That was a brave post @Hanlonsamazer . Glad everything’s worked out OK for you.

OP posts:
girlfriend44 · 31/10/2023 21:56

No she's evil. Should have been hung.

Hereinthismoment · 31/10/2023 21:57

Hanged. (Who?)

OP posts:
LakeTiticaca · 31/10/2023 21:59

Hereinthismoment · 31/10/2023 21:37

not all women are victims and some are actually just nasty criminals who deserve jail time

Well, yeah Confused No one has said otherwise.

But many - not all - will be deserving of pity, many - not all - will be victims themselves, many - not all - will not have caused injury or harm to any individual directly and some not even indirectly.

And the above can apply and someone still go to prison. After all, there are what - two/three women with whole life orders?

Who should pity these women, their victims?

girlfriend44 · 31/10/2023 21:59

Many women suffer trauma but don't end up in prison.

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 22:01

Hereinthismoment · 31/10/2023 21:52

I’ve answered that @BigFatLiar

That was a brave post @Hanlonsamazer . Glad everything’s worked out OK for you.

Thank you. Thankfully my friends are more broad minded than the posters here. It will all come out in my legal action against the police and the family who persecuted me (whilst impersonating a famous UK family). All very bizarre but eye opening and fortunately, I don’t have totalitarian ultra right wing views like the traintimetablers here so I coped ok in prison.

girlfriend44 · 31/10/2023 22:01

Emma Tustin.

lljkk · 31/10/2023 22:01

Most men in prison are victims of trauma, struggle with literacy and chronic poor MH. Also more sad than bad. No baby is born bad. Something went terribly wrong that should not have happened.

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 22:02

girlfriend44 · 31/10/2023 21:59

Many women suffer trauma but don't end up in prison.

Many women get an education but don’t end up being net financial contributors to society.

Antst · 31/10/2023 22:12

Hanlonsamazer · 31/10/2023 22:02

Many women get an education but don’t end up being net financial contributors to society.

I don't know the context of this comment (have to go offline so can't search previous posts) but so what? An education contributes educated voters and people who can contribute in various ways to their communities. Educated women can help their kids and are less likely to end up being financially dependent on abusers. They're less gullible.

ParmaVioletBeauregarde · 31/10/2023 22:13

There’s a really interesting book about female prisons called ‘Prisonomics’ by Vicky Pryce.
And it clearly explores how families fall apart when women are incarcerated — children taken into care as PP have said and the trauma that those children them endure.

i highly recommend the book.

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