I would say that sometimes (or well often actually) I surprise myself in giving a lot of credit about the good things in my life and my main successes to “the universe” or “manifesting.”
I think it’s for a couple of reasons.
1- Often I genuinely struggle to believe I have got to do all the things I have got to do in the last decade, or have the things or job (well salary more so) I have or reached the most of the goals I have had so far.
and that’s because I come from a very poor abusive background, with lots of violence and grew up with social services overviewing my family, so not much hope was put in me and I felt very pre-destined to a completely different life, so I am shocked at the life I actually live and it seems impossible at times that I have the life I have due to simply to my hard work. So many people have similar or even worse backgrounds and work twice as hard (I work hard & a lot but you know what I mean) and don’t get this “luck”, so somehow it seems better to believe in “luck” both good luck and bad luck, than hard work because so much hard work goes unrewarded.
2- A lot of what has positively happened in my life can be traced back to this one unexplainable event in my young teen years where I was about to commit suicide on my birthday because I had such an horrible life and didn’t see the point of keeping it going and yet that day something (I am not religious at all but it was like an inner voice) told me “just wait, wait 3 years, and your life will change. If it doesn’t kill yourself then.”) I have no idea why or what causes this thinking because 3 years felt like such a long-time then, I would have still been a minor living in an abusive house 3 years from then so what were the odds that my life would get better when I would be in about the same situation? And yet it happened. 3 years later I got an opportunity that people from my background normally don’t get, that allowed me to leave my toxic home for a while and it CHANGED my life. Everything after that stems from that opportunity I got in my teens; or so it feels.
And I have only ever had that inner feeling a few times in my life and every time if I follow it, things work out, even if there is no logical reason for it to work out and everything should logically not work out at all. I will give you 2 examples one of the last few months one that just unfolded and is unfolding as I type:
- one of my big goals was to buy a flat. I had a good and well-paid job, was finally about to reach my goal, I had saved up the deposit and a bit more and thought I could get a small mortgage, and had just found out the perfect flat (or so I thought.) as I was in the process of asking for a mortgage I and many people got fired (bad luck), obviously I lost the opportunity to get a mortgage and didn’t have the finances to buy. all hoped seemed lost and I accepted that I would have to postpone my goal of buying (not the end of the world). And then something very strange happen someone randomly volunteered to loan me the money (I didn’t ask them and they had no reason to volunteer) , and at the same time an apartment (a lot cheaper and actually better/better located came into the market) and between the small private loan and what I had I could buy it. But I was still stressed and unsure I should go through with it, I was buying alone, and buying cash meant I had to empty all my accounts and live of nothing (I was not entitled to unemployment). That seemed very risky, and so I did what I do when I am unsure of what I should do and I decided to put the question “out there” and listen to the inner feeling and something told me to buy and that I would be fine, so I did and the day I signed on the apartment I got an offer of a job paid twice the amount of my last contract. I am now mortgage-free, and back with decent saving but it seemed impossible to think I could be in this position back then. (And I don’t think I did much in that scenario to change my outcome).
- The second story is unfolding now. I was looking for a new position, and 2 jobs presented themselves. The first 1 was a well paid one, but horrible schedule and it would mean having no life. I wasn’t necessarily keen on applying but the agency said I could do a 3 months trial contract and so I thought I might as well as at least it would mean a very good salary for 3 months and I thought then maybe I could try and negotiate a better work life balance if they liked my work, but when I interviewed I just didn’t have a necessarily good vibe with the person I interviewed with and so decided to go for the temporary job 2 because it suited what I needed and I had a very good vibe with my employers (and I value work/life balance over money) so I accepted job 2, apologized to Job 1 (they offered me the job in the meantime so I had to refuse it). Anyhow currently working job 2, happily, so no regrets there but I have less than two months left on my contract (and can’t extend it as the position would be moving to the US and I am not eligible to work in the US anymore) and I just got a call from job 1, telling me they truly really like me and would I consider working for them at the end of my contract on a completely revisited contract to the one initially offered (and my dream contract as it’s working half-time but paid full-time kind of contract with lots of time off and still a very high pay). I NEVER mentioned anything about my concerns with the schedule or how I felt be it during the interview or when I rejected the job, as I had the inner feeling that I should accept job 2 and that everything would work itself out exactly as I hoped. So for me it’s absolutely crazy that a job that was looking for someone starting this month with a completely different schedule and that I rejected has now called to offer me the position again, but this time around with the perfect work/life balance and perfect paycheck unmprompted, without negotiating needed on my part and without it even clashing with my current job dates wise.
I don’t know, maybe it’s sheer luck, or a weird fluke and I mean I am not stupid, I do know that nothing is as it seems and that likely of course it’s not the universe, it’s a mix of hard work, being more focused on my objectives, having worked hard on my career, luck and coincidences. But on the other hand when I look back at my life I still cannot make it make sense, and sometimes it helps to think that it’s the universe’s way to make up for all the bad luck I have had (though again I do know it’s a false narrative as way too many people are born, live all of their life and die in traumatic ways). I also think having this belief makes you more daring. I don’t mind taking (considered) risks both in life and my career because I was made to believe things will work itself out. So I am sure a lot of what happens and happen in my life is also based on the mindset and personality and approach I have developed since one good thing worked itself out. But it helps and in my case it works, so in the end I don’t care if it’s manifesting, the universe, God, or me. It’s probably none of those things but just a massive coincidence, but it doesn’t harm me so… I’ll keep believing and I’ll keep listening to that inner feeling whenever it pops up its head because some way somehow I always end up exactly where I am meant to (and even the bad now leads to a lighter path somehow) when I do. I don’t think trusting in something (ideally you)