To be considering private school at reception?

[Aramist]

We live in a small village which happens to have a really good private school 5 minute walk away. We've looked round, talked with the teachers, done our research. Loved it.

We've also looked around the nearest state school, which is a 5 minute drive away. Also a nice school, headteacher brilliant. Lots of recommendations.

The thing is, even though we can comfortably afford it, the class sizes at the private school are tiny. We're talking maybe 6 or 7 kids per year group. I think there are something like 20 (if that) kids in the whole of key stage 1. I can see that being a lovely thing, family feel and the attention my DD will get would be great, but I worry about her socially as I can see her being a quiet and sensitive child at school.

With the state school, each year group has about 30. Big classes. I work in state and have a class of 30 and it's hard work, can be chaotic and I just can't give every child the attention they deserve. I'd also worry with her potentially being quite quiet she'd get a bit 'lost' in a big class like that, but at least she'd have local friends (not necessarily in same village though).

The other issue is if we moved house. Our house isn't necessarily our forever home but we're happy for now.

I'm torn. Any words of advice?

I would say send DD to state for now. As long as she is able to keep up with good reading skills, which i’m sure you’ll have more invovlement in anyway, reception is mostly still play.

In my personal experience, I would say save your money for private for either the later years of primary school and/or secondary school.

Do you mean adult attention? Can you explain why you find that so valuable? Especially in EYFS, but also in KS1, I would feel that quality interactions with peers was more important.

Im interested that as a teacher, you are considering this. Im a teacher, have taught private and state primary. Would def opt for state in this situation. Though the short walk would be v v tempting!

Me and my brother were sent to the local state school with classes of 25 people.
My two younger sisters were sent to an expensive private school exactly as you have described.
Guess who fared better in the long run?
Of course, I’m offering one example. But like a previous poster said, it’s far easier to move from a bigger school to a smaller one if the fit isn’t right.
I’d save my money and go for the highly rated state school.

@Saschka thanks that's reassuring.

I think the right choice is the state school. I guess I'm just a bit biased as I'm very frustrated with the whole education system currently. It's such a mess.
The reception class I walked into on the open day at the state school just felt so claustrophobic and chaotic and the teachers looked shattered !

Six children is way too small a class. It's harmful for their education on top of being socially very difficult.

Forgive me, I am a key stage 2 teacher. I'm not experienced in EYFS.
I think I'm just so frustrated in my own class of 30 children where so many need way more support and attention that I just can't give them. I don't want that to be my daughter.

I guess in reception this is less important, of course.

They do at Reception age, but in Y1/2 that stops abruptly (no idea why, and it is annoying for me as I happen to be better friends with the girls’ mums).

I wouldn’t send my child to such a small school. I personally wouldn’t waste money with a private primary either. If you want a private education I’d start at year 7. Fortunately I’ve got outstanding schools on my doorstep and my kids couldn’t have done any better results wise if they’d have gone private. I know that’s not the only reason parents pay for private but 20k ish a year for secondary is a large sum of money

State school with extra money for tuition

The reception class I walked into on the open day at the state school just felt so claustrophobic and chaotic and the teachers looked shattered!

I think that is just what looking after a group of four year olds is like! I looked like that after DS’s birthday parties, and that was only ever 15 kids for two hours.

DS’s reception class also always felt like managed chaos with kids running about everywhere, but he finished the year reading on blue book band (could just about recognise and copy his name when he started) so they were obviously doing something right.

It'll be luck of the draw with her year group though. I had a class of 20 once that had 2 girls; in one of the year groups there were none at all.

@Saschka yea that's true.
I think deep down she'd be fine at the state school.
Something just seems to be clawing at me about the private school.

Do they teach one year per class or are they combined? I went to a private school and have worked in schools where the year sizes are tiny and I think a combination of the two would be terrible, especially if the clad sizes are actually that tiny. I've known a class with only one girl which was possibly better than the one with two who were liable to fall out at any second. The only saving grace was that they were taught with other year groups so there were other girls to socialise with.

I think small class sizes are a bit of a risk. Academically it sounds lovely but if the child finds themself bullied, not quite fitting in then they're isolated with no opportunity to find a new group of friends. My daughter is in a one form entry of 25 and even that's too small for my liking given some of the issues we can see emerging.

Combined.

This year it's reception/year 1. About 12 in the class I think.
Then a year 2 class next door with maybe 8 or 9 I think.

I think they come together alot for playtimes etc.

My DD14 went to a small private school after year 6. I really wish I'd sent her to private prep now too.

The key thing though is about your child what she is like.

My Dd has hugely benefited from the small classes and it being single sex and is flourishing but I feel she played two years of catch up after being in classes of 30 at state primary.

My DD is ND though she has ADHD so the small classes are a massive benefit.

I disagree. I’d choose the private. It sounds lovely and small class sizes are great.

You wouldn’t believe the amount of older children I know who have problems at state. Of course lots of children are happy, but if you can afford it and it’s a five min walk away, go for the lovely private. A walk is better than a drive, and a small class is better than a big one.

@jeaux90 it's difficult. Our DD is quite a quiet, sensible sort. She doesn't seem to be academically behind or ahead but her speech has been a bit delayed.
I can see her being the sort of child who is 'left out' easily but I also can't see her being the sort to have a big friendship group. I can see her sticking to 1 or 2 good friends, very much like I was at school.

OP, do I understand that there are composite classes? I've worked in those and no way would I be paying for it!

Honestly deep down I think that's how I feel as well.
It's why I'm so torn ! I want to do what's right for my DD.
I have spoken to someone who has a son in year 2 at the private school and has been since reception and has absolutely thrived.

Only at the bottom. Single year groups from year 2 up to year 11.

Exactly this. And I've seen it so many times.

Yea good points. Part of me thinks though that surely bullying would be far more noticeable in a small group and would be stamped out quicker?

Not necessarily OP, unfortunately. In your position I'd start off at the larger state primary and review after a few years.

It’s worse when you’re bullied in a class of 30 with over stretched teachers who don’t know how to handle it.

You can’t bullet-proof a bullying scenario. And - in theory - a small, nurturing school would be able to deal with it better purely because they have the resources to.

I would argue though that at big schools bullying can quite easily happen under the radar and can be far more challenging to deal with with fewer resources to do so.

@Writingwrite888 cross posted a bit there !