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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have a shower with 6 month old in the bathroom

115 replies

Jelllytot · 19/10/2023 12:32

Ok so I haven't had a shower in TWO days (DH is on a work trip) and was hoping to have one while my 6 month old was napping but she woke up before I could. Anyway, I fed her, changed her nappy, she was happy as Larry so I stuck her in her chair that has a busy board on it and placed her in the doorway of the bathroom.

Got undressed and started the shower. About a minute in she started crying very hard. Like she was scared 🥺 so I got out and cuddled her but she was looking at me like she wasn't convinced about me.

Is it abnormal to shower with very little babies in the bathroom?
She's breastfed so my boobs flopping out shouldn't have looked weird.
I mean I always have my hair up so maybe she saw a mass of big black hair around me and got scared?
Or maybe she thought the shower was attacking me?

But AIBU to have tried to shower with her in there?

I won't be doing it again because she seemed terrified but it wasn't something I thought was very wrong..

OP posts:
MargotBamborough · 19/10/2023 12:57

I did this all the time on mat leave.

Sometimes babies cry. She'll be fine.

mikikki · 19/10/2023 12:58

Jelllytot · 19/10/2023 12:34

Or maybe she was horrified at the sight of my grotesque naked body

She most likely thinks you are the most beautiful thing in the world. She will get use to having to share you with the shower eventually x

ASCCM · 19/10/2023 12:58

maddiemookins16mum · 19/10/2023 12:54

Seriously has she not slept for longer than 10 minutes in 2 whole days?

Also though, why is this an excuse not to have washed?? Why does the baby need to be asleep for you to get sorted? Put the baby somewhere safe and have a shower!! This isn’t hard!

PenguinRainbows · 19/10/2023 12:59

Nothing wrong with it. Although with DD1 she didn’t like it when I had my hair up in a towel at that age 😂

FreestyleInTrance · 19/10/2023 12:59

I had my baby in the bathroom with me every week day - she was a pram napper so I didn't get anything done during naps! When she was tiny I lay her on a mat on the floor, then once she got too mobile for that I popped her in a bath seat at the other end of the bath... once she was in with me I did use cooler water and kids shampoo just to be on the safe side, so it wasn't quite ideal, but at least I was clean!

I also sang to her throughout, sometimes with dancing! It was perhaps not the most dignified, but I'd heard horror stories about not being able to shower for a week, and I was determined to get a quick daily shower whilst keeping her happy.

PenguinRainbows · 19/10/2023 13:00

Jelllytot · 19/10/2023 12:34

Or maybe she was horrified at the sight of my grotesque naked body

Snap out of this now before you end up causing your daughter similar issues.

Moriquendi · 19/10/2023 13:01

It was probably the noise, showers can be quite loud. I take my son in the shower with him, he gets some water play which he loves and we both get clean! The first twice he didn’t want to go under the water, it was scary, but after that he loved it. Though this does work better if they can sit by themselves.

NextLeft · 19/10/2023 13:01

Did it all the time. In fact, doctor suggested it when DC1 was very tiny and had a cold because the steam helped clear the nose.

It's probably just a new experience and your baby will get used to it if it becomes routine.

toadasoda · 19/10/2023 13:03

I had my twins lying/ rolling/ crawling or whatever they were at anytime I showered when they were little. There wasn't a chance of getting back upstairs once we were up for the day so they came with me. They would be on the floor outside the ensuite on a blanket when they were little as I could see them but once they started to move a bit they were locked in with me. Its absolutely fine and normal. Baby will get used to the noise or whatever was the issue.

SouthernBel · 19/10/2023 13:03

Jelllytot · 19/10/2023 12:34

Or maybe she was horrified at the sight of my grotesque naked body

In her eyes, you are the most glorious and gorgeous human in the world ♥️

Also, totally fine to shower! My DS would happily go in his wee bouncy chair outside the shower, I'd usually put a mobile above him for him to bat around, but more often he'd just give me judgemental stares as I sang to him whilst I washed! He was a bit unsettled the first two times I did it, but got used to it really quickly. It's paid dividends, as he's now 2 and when his daddy is working away, he is totally relaxed in the shower and likes to stand in there with me whilst I wash - so easy!

Tohaveandtohold · 19/10/2023 13:04

I don’t understand how you haven’t had a shower in 2 days because there’s no other adult at home. I have 3 children and always have a shower every morning, it wakes me up.
when they were little, I woke up before them to shower but if not, I’ll just leave them safe in the cot and have my shower. Crying for less than 5 minutes won’t hurt really.

Tempnamechng · 19/10/2023 13:05

Mine used to come in the shower with me. We had a Bumbo, which was very useful for the shower.

DuploTrain · 19/10/2023 13:08

Now this is completely off topic, but I always find it fascinating that threads like these have unanimous “it won’t hurt baby to cry for a few minutes, you’re being silly”.

However on sleep training threads it’s “I couldn’t leave my baby to cry for 90 seconds before giving them a cuddle, it’s barbaric and will scar them for life”.

Iwasafool · 19/10/2023 13:09

Jelllytot · 19/10/2023 12:34

Or maybe she was horrified at the sight of my grotesque naked body

This made me laugh. Kids judge us it's true but they don't normally start that young.

She'll be fine, mine seem to have survived OK and my body has too many lumps and bumps.

financialcareerstuff · 19/10/2023 13:12

OP,
I'd actively try again and soon. First time might have felt weird. Next time she'll probably be fine.... Grin she will have learned a new thing about the world - funny water sounds and wet mummy is all fine!

RubyGemStone · 19/10/2023 13:16

Seriously, take more time for yourself. Not being able to shower for 2 days because you can't leave her for 15 minutes isn't good for you in the long run.

Mamai90 · 19/10/2023 13:18

I used to put my DD in the jumparoo in the bathroom when I was showering.

potatoheads · 19/10/2023 13:19

Jelllytot · 19/10/2023 12:34

Or maybe she was horrified at the sight of my grotesque naked body

Waaaaiiiittttt a minute. Your 6 month old has never seen you fully naked? Seriously?
And no child that young would judge their parent's body anyway.
So much of your comments concern me more from a place of how damning you are being about your body and if you have hidden from your dc. You will pass on very unhealthy body issues

MammaTo · 19/10/2023 13:20

I used to have a little bouncer in the bathroom and put the iPad on top of the closed toilet seat with some dancing fruit or miss rachael.

LylaLee · 19/10/2023 13:21

I remember bringing a high chair into the bathroom.

Mulhollandmagoo · 19/10/2023 13:38

She will be fine OP, it was just a new experience for her and she wasn't sure. Definitely keep trying, and she will get used to it - just lots of reassurance that you are fine 😊My daughter was unsure of the shower for such a long time, she is 4 now and loves it and I can't lie its made my life a million times easier being able to shower her rather than bath her.

Would popping her in her cot for 10 mins be better?

Goldbar · 19/10/2023 13:42

My older DC was in the bathroom (or at least the doorway) with me while I showered until I deemed it safe to leave them for a few minutes in front of the TV. Younger one will be too - first in a bouncer, then a highchair or strapped into the buggy. You do what you need to do to keep them safe and you sane and clean.

namechange55465 · 19/10/2023 13:47

ASCCM · 19/10/2023 12:58

Also though, why is this an excuse not to have washed?? Why does the baby need to be asleep for you to get sorted? Put the baby somewhere safe and have a shower!! This isn’t hard!

Show quote history

What is the fucking point of posts like this.

Saying "IT ISN'T HARD" to people who are clearly finding the thing hard and are asking for help is rude, pointless and ignorant.

EatYourVegetables · 19/10/2023 13:54

FFS, has the OP said all she did the last two days was shower and sleep? Who made food, did the dishes, tidied up after the baby, did the shopping, etc etc? How fucking nice of you to support a struggling mum.

saythatagaintome · 19/10/2023 13:54

OP, it’s likely the sound of the water! My baby HATED when I would turn the shower on as it scared her. She’s fine if I’m
in the bath though.