To think everyone on MN has 3+ kids

[Hereforlaugh]

I have read so many threads on MN where people keep posting about having 3 or more kids. It feels like everyone on MN has over 3 kids and what's really baffling is that this country's fertility rates are declining. Not sure about how it all works and how people afford so many DC.

Not got children myself but most of my friends and DB and his family have either 1 or 2 children. Yes a few have 3 but as it’s expensive/hard work, a lot don’t. I was speaking to a friend who’s a mum friend and has 1 DC aged 5 and she said definitely she wouldn’t have another one, maybe in a couple of years but she was quite happy with 1 DC.

Not at all. I'd say the majority have one or two.

Probably about 75% of mums I know have 2 kids, including myself. There are a few who have just 1, three who have 3, and I only know one mum with 4 kids.

🤣🤣🤣

This is utterly affected.

I've had a thorough search, including the cupboard under the stairs, the cellar and the shed and ...... it seems I have no children 😳

I think it varies from area to area, probably dependent on house prices as much as anything. I grew up in rural Scotland, there were lots of families with 3-5 kids when I was growing up and still are now. Only children were incredibly rare and referred to by my Mum as 'precious' which I suspect was suggesting they weren't onlies through parental choice.

I live in the NE now (cheapest part of England to buy a house) and know as many 3s as 2s and quite a few 4s as well. But my friends down south says 3s are unheard of.

Oh, and I get on with all my siblings (I'm the eldest of 4) as adults, as do all my friends who come from large families so I don't recognise the 'lots of people don't get on with their siblings' you often see here.

You need to find yourself a hobby, luv.

I've got one.

You seem to have totally misunderstood the point of my post 😂

I'm pregnant with my 4th and definitely the odd one out around where I live. Most people have 2 and there are quite a lot of one child families too.

When I tell people it's my 4th the often have a look crossed between horror and confusion!

2 here. 3 is alot for childcare though. Gets costly.

I feel like this in real life - my friends and coworkers that have kids all have 3-5! I literally don’t know anyone with only 1, though I know a few childless people so that balances it out a bit.

@BertieBotts I was being sarky 😂

Had a think

I know

one with 6
One with 5
3/4 with 3
Lots with 2
Lots with 1

Don't think anyone has 4 kids - racks brains

I have 4 and only know 2 families with one child. Most families we know have 2 or 3.

we only wanted two. We've got two.

However, the majority of our friends have 3, a few have 4, and one of the families we are very close to have 5 (although they were aiming at 4 - but number 4 turned out to be twins!). Another family we are less close to also have 5, in their case they had 4 girls and were desperate for a boy, which they managed on the 5th go.

Interestingly, with one of the families we know who have 4 children, both the parents are from families of 4 children themselves.

I have two of my own and one I fostered from older teen age. I have one friend who has 4, but the normal among my friends is one or two.

I have 3 kids. They're under 7 so costs arent huge. Childcare isn't too bad as we use a term time preschool. My parents have them in the holidays or we use camps for the older two (and annual leave where possible). We're lucky as we both WFH so can do the drop offs and pick ups.

Clothes are mostly hand me downs from family, car boot sales or vinted. Some supermarket clothes and the odd Next item.

Most toys for preschoolers are secondhand with new toys at Christmas and birthdays.

Two share a bedroom so we live in a 3 bedroom house, same as we would if we had 2 kids.

Food isn't too bad as I choose wisely. Less snack food.

We have two. I would quite happily have a third, but DH definitely does not want any more and has had the snip.

I don't know where you're seeing this. I have one and never entertained the idea of having more.

Very few of my friends have more than two.

It may be a demographic thing. Most of my friends and contemporaries live in London and work FT, don't have family around to support with childcare. Having 3+ kids in such circumstances would be ruinously stressful and expensive.

It may be a demographic thing. Most of my friends and contemporaries live in London and work FT, don't have family around to support with childcare. Having 3+ kids in such circumstances would be ruinously stressful and expensive.

Apart from the 'living in London' part this setup is true for all the larger families I know. House prices obviously impact the 'ruinously expensive' part but as far as stressful goes I'd say the parents of 3+ kids I know are all very capable and organised and aren't the type to get stressed by the logistics of family life.

Maybe as a lot of posters are SAHM and they can’t afford childcare! I’ve got 3 (but work full time)

The ons has families with three or more children in 2022 at 15%. One child families at 44% and two children families at 41%

https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/families/bulletins/familiesandhouseholds/2022#:~:text=Of%20all%20families%20with%20dependent,15%25%20(1.2%20million).

One and done here.

My 5 yo DD has extensive additional needs and would love a second, but her needs and our finances effectively prohibits us.