DH works in one of the professions and when we met was ambitious and driven. He worked hard and played hard (to use the cliche) and it was one of the things that attracted me to him. Despite working hard he always made time for me and had a reasonable work life balance.
DD is 3 and whilst DH was unsure about us having kids, he’s a great dad. However, his attitude to work has changed completely and he works less, doesn’t have his work phone on him constantly, and is just different. He doesn’t prioritise work any longer, he does what’s needed and that’s that.
Opportunities for promotion recently came up, to a position he’s wanted since I’ve known him. However, he’s not putting himself forward. When I asked why, he said life was different now and he can’t devote the time he needs to achieving what he wants professionally without being a rubbish dad. He said he was sad but accepted it and DD came first, and that the extra money doesn’t compensate for him not being around
I just feel really sad that the driven man I married has given up on his ambitions. I don’t really know what I’m trying to ask, I just thought things would remain the same after DD.