To rekindle after being ghosted

[SoWhatHappenedThereThen]

Name changed but long-time user, posting here for opinions and other perspectives.

Months and months ago I was suddenly ghosted by someone I was very fond of and very close to. I was utterly gutted. No explanation, they just disappeared and any message/call etc. was blocked or never delivered or went to voicemail....you get the picture.

I spent weeks wondering if I'd done something wrong, or upset the other person without realising, or whether they were ill or had a tragic accident (!) - all sorts of things until I realised they'd just walked away. Sobbed my heart out, recovered after a while but still wonder why. However, I have subsequently picked myself up, got a new job, moved to another area of the country and moved on. Can't say I actually got over them though.

Suddenly, out of the blue, they have been in touch. They want a conversation, and to pick up where we left off.....
I am still so fond of them, but unsure... AIBU to rekindle our relationship? Or am I setting myself up for more heartache? What would you do in my position?

Remember the old saying.
Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me.

They've proved who they are. Now it's up to you to use that information to your advantage.

@CeciledeVolangesdeNouveau "He let me pay for a trip abroad having told my friend he’d fallen in love with someone else."

I hope that's an ex-friend!

I did exactly the same in my late teens/early 20s. LTR with Billy Big Shot who regularly went AWOL and just turned back up telling me how much he loved me and I was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. I just lapped that shit up! What a pathetic idiot I was 🫨.

Eventually I wrote to him essentially telling him he was a tragic, cheap slut and never to contact me again. And that was that.

Decades and marriages later, a mutual friend asked my permission to give him my email address as he wanted to apologise. I thought "that'll be interesting" so agreed. Needless to say I never got an email.

I think me agreeing was "evidence" enough for him that he'd been "forgiven" and assuaged any guilt he'd carried any those years. Thankfully I didn't give a shit.

Maybe OPs friend has used this technique too. Just checking that she's still available....

I think if someone makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe orr that they could be harmful to you that is a good reason to block.