To think any parent would do the same? Or am I bonkers

[Doritosandsourcream]

On holiday in the buffet eating dinner all I could hear was my son crying walking from the bar with his juice in his hand. I thought oh maybe he fell over so DH went over to him. Turns out that this little girl that has been picking on him for the past 2 days her dad has grabbed DS and twisted arm so tight he broke his skin and dug his nails into him. (German family)

DS has been coming to me about her saying she keeps pushing him and sticking her fingers up since they arrived. DS finally got annoyed and pushed her back earlier on in the day and she told her dad. So dad got his own back on DS.

I ran over to DH as he was shouting at the dad and the dad was just smirking and something just came over me and I punched him in the face.

Never in my life have I punched anyone and I didn’t think about the consequences at the time I just kept looking at my son he was in flood of tears.

It was the weirdest feeling I have never felt adrenaline like it.

aibu? How would you have handled it? The hotel did absolutely nothing.

We all know you shouldn't have done it, you know you shouldn't have done it, it wasn't the right thing to do, it shouldn't be encouraged, but fair play for standing up for yourself and your family.

It's not as if you were drunk by the pool causing a nuisance to everyone around you for the duration. Seeing your child assaulted is a major provocation. Of course violence is bad, not the answer, not something you want your kid to see etc, but at the same time not everything is black and white. Bullies should be stood up to and that's what you did.

more: OP was trying to intimate that Germans are rough with children.

I can assure you that is not the case and (as the citizenship test makes VERY clear it is neither legally or socially acceptable to lay hands on ANY children)

"perhaps they do things differently there" my fanny.

If this is true where were you and your husband when the other child was bullying yours. Surely on holiday you have your 6 year old with you at all times.

Not unreasonable. Ignore what everyone is saying about "being the better person" "reporting him to the police" etc. It's a foreign country who's to say the police would do anything.
He got what he deserved

You have not convinced me how her adding that he was German has added anything of use to her story, as she tells it to us, so non-biased and not at all made to sound like she had good reason to do what she did.

The correct answer is you were wrong, you shouldn’t have punched the guy. You should have got the police involved and done an official report.

The answer that lots of people would say is that in the moment they’d probably behave the same. Someone that would do that to a child probably doesn’t care too much about the police.
I personally would have told my daughter and wife to walk away for a moment so my daughter didn’t see. (I know it’s wrong, I won’t listen to any lectures from people that’s my opinion).

Sounds really satisfying to be honest, flipping smug ‘see you next Tuesday’

.....and maybe in his version that's not true at all.
We are seeing one side of a story, and OP could have intervened at earlier points.

*"perhaps they do things differently there" my fanny."

I think this isn't an invalid perspective if the OP has limited experience of German culture.
An old neighbour of mine used to hit her son, aged 3, around the head with a wooden spoon if he misbehaved. When her partner moved in, he explained she absolutely couldn't do that and why that was. She was baffled and said it was the norm in her country.
I have never been to the country she is from so that's my only experience of their use of corporal punishment.

So I'm guessing no-one actually saw what the GERMAN (hilarious!) father did: it's just what the 6-yr old said?
So the only proven assault is the OP punching someone in the face, for which THEY could have called the police?

And....why the hell isn't the 6-yr old at school anyway?!

Him being German is relevant; there's a language barrier. Screaming at him in English would be pretty pointless. Even people who speak a second language well won't understand what's being said if they're being yelled at.

Please tell me we're not already crying about this post being "racist" op was telling her story and the man came from Germany so she mentioned that. Probably to show there was a language barrier

tbh if my 6 year old had been telling me another kid had been pestering him, it wouldn't have gone on for 2 days. It wouldn't have gone on beyond the first report, because I'd have told him to give the child a wide berth. If he'd come back saying she was still doing it, i'd have gone with him to the parents and asked them to keep a closer eye on her.

Having said all that: my experience of German parenting (which is extensive) is that 6 year olds can sort themselves out to a certain extent.

Without revealing too much about my real identity, I have developed quite an interest in German culture, language etc over the last few years, and agree with your comments. I think that OP felt by mentioning the man being German it would somehow convince us more of her version of events. I'd love to hear the man's side of things.

I've not given my opinion on what OP did (she was 100% in the wrong FWIW)

I'm not trying to convince you, I know it doesn't add anything to the story to say "he was German" but I guarantee someone would've asked her where he was from if she hadn't. There are some countries where people wouldn't bat an eyelid at another adult chastising someone else's child.

Sanctimonious much

You are the first person to mention race actually.

no because she goes on to the ridiculous chat with her DH that maybe German parents are different. The clear intimation is that German parents (but not British ones) are violent. It was ok until that point.

And you know, and I know, there wouldn't have been a language barrier. Have you met Germans on holiday? their English is often better than a lot of Brits.

Agree. I think I would possibly have done the same, you harm my child and being punched in the face will be the least of your worries. We'll done OP!

it's clear from my other posts here that I'm half-German-ish (thanks, Brexit) and that i have spent a lot of time here, and have German DCs who are now adults.

There is no typical German parenting in the same way there is no typical British parenting. It was just a massive dig with the "perhaps they are different". The inference was very clear.

I recently got back from Germany actually and I can confirm that there is indeed a language barrier

If an adult assaults my child, damn right I’m swinging back and my child knows that I’d defend them to ends of the earth.

Scroll up and you will see people derailing the thread by reading too much into op mentioning the man being German.
At the end of the day he got what he deserved for attacking a little boy

What did your dh do? You know, the man that lets you take your screaming child back to the hotel room in the pitch dark, up 3 flights of stairs, trying to manage a child and a buggy while he stays drinking with his parents and your other children?

If it was just purely descriptive why put it in brackets?

And breaking the skin by twisting an arm? I do find that hard to believe!