To think any parent would do the same? Or am I bonkers

[Doritosandsourcream]

On holiday in the buffet eating dinner all I could hear was my son crying walking from the bar with his juice in his hand. I thought oh maybe he fell over so DH went over to him. Turns out that this little girl that has been picking on him for the past 2 days her dad has grabbed DS and twisted arm so tight he broke his skin and dug his nails into him. (German family)

DS has been coming to me about her saying she keeps pushing him and sticking her fingers up since they arrived. DS finally got annoyed and pushed her back earlier on in the day and she told her dad. So dad got his own back on DS.

I ran over to DH as he was shouting at the dad and the dad was just smirking and something just came over me and I punched him in the face.

Never in my life have I punched anyone and I didn’t think about the consequences at the time I just kept looking at my son he was in flood of tears.

It was the weirdest feeling I have never felt adrenaline like it.

aibu? How would you have handled it? The hotel did absolutely nothing.

I wasn’t here looking for everyone to agree with me it’s one of those things you can’t say until it’s you in that position. Never been violent in my life naturally very quiet and shy DH has always said to me If anything ever happened to our kids I don’t think you would say or do anything.

But as I said something just to took a hold of me you don’t put your hands on kids let alone anyone else’s.

That’ll work 😂😂

Wait, so you decided to punch him because there wasn't time to report it?!

I could understand (not justify) a heat of the moment reaction, but that isn't what it was if you'd had time to find out how long the police would ta**ke.

This is like a scene out of Benidorm.

Oh wow didn't expect you to say that

Good on you I say

Sometimes it's just instinctive, if someone had put hands on my child and then acting with such contempt I believe I'd have done the same tbh

God help the little girl, if her dad feels comfortable doing that to a child in public what does he do behind closed doors to his own children.

Lots of things spring to mind with this. Why was a six year old in a situation where they were unsupervised, with another child who was supposedly repeatedly causing problems with him? Why didn't you step in and try to sort out the problems before things escalated to the point where your son retaliated? How do you know that your son's account of what happened with the girl is accurate? I think six year olds can give very different versions of events. Why was your child unsupervised at the buffet? How can you know that he didn't provoke the girl again before the father stepped in? I'm not in any way condoning the girl's father grabbing his arm but surely this wouldn't have happened if he had been supervised? By punching the father you will have really made yourself into a laughing stock at the hotel, and you've sent a terrible message to your son thst it's ok to retaliate with violence.

I am referring to the apparent issues with the other child which she already knew about, not the buffet thing (though tbh it's questionable whether a 6 year old would go over alone or not).

i went into several details about when physical violence is appropriate or necessary.
When i had a man groping my tits and trying to stuff a hand down my jeans how do you suggest i get him off me? I punched him, some men who were in the bar then prevented him from hurting me further and the police were involved.

I have in no way said that violence is never justified or necessary. I did say that in this case it was a vast overreaction since the man was doing nothing to either OP or her child at the time she hit him.

Try to understand nuance and situation, eh?

Do you think that maybe your DS was also complicit and that it wasn't as one-sided as you make out? In your other post, you said he's extremely challenging, screams and throws food everywhere and that you can't cope with his behaviour. The other dad was at least supervising his kid, even though he should not have grabbed your DS.

Maybe this bully will think twice before he decides to assault a small child again. So for that reason, I don't think you were unreasonable at all.

no this is 6 year old ds not 1 year old.

It already happened. Your husband was dealing with it and you charged over and punched the guy. You weren't protecting anybody 😂

I understand wanting to, but don't pretend it did any good beside teaching your kid violence is the way.

Apparently the child throwing stuff was a different DS, a younger one, but I agree that OP should have intervened sooner.

Maybe the OP has presented him as a bully assaulting a child by either missing out info, misrepresenting info, or not actually knowing the full story?

Okay, sorry I didn't realise there were 2 DS's. Still wrong to punch someone and to teach your kids to physically retaliate.

It really is surprising that so many people think the police forces of three different countries would work together on this because of a case of ABH after an adult had allegedly injured a child.

At the precise point you were punching the man in the face what was your son in danger of?

This wasn't protecting your son it was retaliation. You could have dealt with it with words.

The whole lot of you are awful. What a way to behave in front of children.

Yeah and i was still stood there for how long with him smirking and doing a ssshing face at me. I didnt just run over there and punch him. He thought he could hurt my son sit there finish his dinner then starting laughing it up. He’s sick!

If punching someone that abused my child makes me rough I will be rough that’s absolutely fine.

You disgusting, elitist snob.

Not half Germanish. But was going to say the same thing having lived in Germany at the time when the law changed.

Tbh op I wouldn’t have done this. However part of me thinks Brava.

I can't believe so many people think it's ok to punch someone in the face!
I'd have had strong words and then called the police. That's not only protecting my child but teaching them that violence isn't ok.

@alloalloallo

Poor DD. You'd think a grown woman would have more compassion & understanding.

I have only had that red rage once in my life to that degree, but anyone being that awful to/about my godson with SEN, doesn't get much leeway before I call them out about it.

im glad you're DH was there to back you up & to stop it getting out of control.

i hope she's barred from the place!!

I would have called the police because the man assaulted your son.

I would have absolutely done the same! I honestly find it absolutely bizarre that so many people would be willing to let a grown man hurt their 6 year old and just 'report to reception' - very odd behaviour! I honestly don't understand the world in which people with that mentality come from.

He hurt your child, was smug and unapologetic - he got a thump. Job well done.

She didn't need to punch the man in the face to protect her child; her son was not in immediate danger from this man. OP lost her temper and is trying to justify it, plain and simple.