To expect my 11 year old to be able to use the toilet during the school day?

[bendy75]

Is this the norm? My 11 year old started in at secondary school last month and has had two warnings (or stage 2 - Low level disruptions) for asking to use the toilet.

I told him to try and go at break times but he tells me they are locked, confirmed today by staff when I asked, children who have a medical need can apply for a toilet pass but he does not, so has to try and go from 8.00 am until returning home around 3.00pm without using the toilet.

AIBU to be shocked by this?

If the school is full of feral children who can't even be trusted to use a toilet without ripping it off the wall the I suspect the level of education the other children are getting is pretty minimal anyway and their health should be prioritised.

Those who are blaming the Tories — let’s see how much changes when there’s a Labour government. My prediction: bugger all. There will presumably be more funding, but feral children will still be feral.

It will obviously help if there's more funding, they can supervise the "feral" children better, have CCTV and as a last resort pay to have the toilets fixed repeatedly.

If the school is full of feral children who can't even be trusted to use a toilet without ripping it off the wall the I suspect the level of education the other children are getting is pretty minimal anyway and their health should be prioritised.

DS got very good GCSE grades - and looks to have had a good start at A-level.

DD2 happier this year in GCS as her options and sets mean she much more away from disruptive elements and only really has to deal with them between classes and after school hours.

I sure as fuck not in favour of further disrupting their education because other pupils poor behavior which already impact them.

… and that the other 29 kids in the class should also be denied access to the toilet? The “collective punishment” angle here is really bothering me. I get that there are plenty of horrible, feral children who vandalise toilets, vape and bully in them etc. But even in the “worst” schools there are going to be well-behaved, decent kids who just want to learn and are getting subjected to the same dehumanising treatment. And what can they or their parents do? They can’t change the behaviour of their peers.

DC school had CCTV made no difference and I'm in Wales with a Welsh government in charge of education.

I'd actually in favour of more funding around education and a focus on it like in Blair years but I think there also a deeper problem in some schools.

How nice for your clever, top set children.

Spare a thought for the less bright ones stuck in the bottom sets with these hooligans and also not allowed to go to the toilet.

Separate issue, but some schools in Scotland replaced all their toilets with unisex toilets to make life easier for trans students. The result was that girls were dehydrating themselves during the day and skipping school altogether when on their period.

The school doesn't need to be "full of feral children" for this to happen.
You generally find that it is about 5% in the entire school that do this.
% of kids if we have a school of 1000 pupils

God yes I remember the relief of being streamed in Third Year (Scottish system) and getting away from all the disruptive wasters who made learning impossible. Shame they can’t link toilet access to educational performance too..

But the toilets are broken and there's no money to fix them.

And round we go.

Incidentally, back in the real world the DfE have just admitted that they fucked up the school funding calculations for next year and your average secondary school will be getting about £50,000 less than they were expecting.

So they will be looking to make more cuts.

But that is probably down the the teachers not letting these decision makers go to the toilet when they need to and making them sit in classes with feral kids and giving them a poor education.

Its all the fault of the teachers.

(Just for those that didn't get it, its sarcasm)

So @MargotBamborough you are going with the approach of maximising access to toilets with CCTV and supervision and reduced teaching staff (as no extra funding for the former) and schools are going with the approach of reducing access to toilets and maximising teaching staff

And next year they will have to reduce staff due to fuck up with funding, so will be even worse!

And don't forget some schools will have reduced access to some buildings due to RAAC issues (my username is apt!)

Your the one suggestible writing of my DC as not worth bothering with their education.

I'm more than aware of discipline issue thank you very much - and as DN was in lower sets in a nice leafy suburb rather than lower social economic area my kid school is located in I know she suffered disruption as well.

I don't need educating by some self righteous areshole more than willing to write off bright kids - or in fact any kids - struggling in difficult schools.

I also know all about issue of unisex toilet as that what my DC essentially had - open plan sinks in middle nominally boys down one side girls other - because again my Kids have had to put up with the problems.

You think you raising issue that I and many on here are unaware when unfortunately we are painfully aware of why restrictive access is resorted to - I don't see anyone liking it here and not wanting better - and all your suggestions so far have been tried in my DC school and failed.

the question should actually be, why are the toilets locked at break time? If its because some of the kids are abusing them (vaping springs to mind) then the school needs to allocate a staff member of some kind to do toilet duty because they should be open - you can't expect kids not to need the toilet during class if they have no option to go during break time! How would the teachers feel if THEIR toilets were locked during the times they were actually allowed to go?

Should that username maybe be “TooBusyto RTFTMummy”, hmmm?

Not saying it can't happen ever but teachers are usually pretty good at spotting an emergency, either way my class wait till break and manage

It's shocking to think that this was going on 25+ years ago in high-school for so many of us on this post.
Then to find out nothing has changed and its still going on in 2023 is utter madness!

No one should be expected to go that long without going to the loo, they have to allow access, sure they are locked all day? If that is true it's ridiculous

I don't know how to say this any more clearly.

A building without toilet provision is not fit for human occupation.

If my children's school was this bad I would do whatever was necessary to remove them from it.

@MargotBamborough and where would you move them to if all the other local schools had the same policy?

You would think I am goady wouldn't you because it's the easier option. It's our children who suffer. Anyway I am goady and complaining for wanting a better future for our children. Hope you have a lovely day.

I don't know how to say this any more clearly:

Saying that it's unacceptable doesn't fix the problem.