To have spent 12 years of child benefit?

[FullMoomin]

Having a panic attack.
I've just calculated that over the past 12 years of spending child benefit every month I've spent over £20,000!!!!!
I should have saved this money for DC!
If I had saved it, I could give it to them.
Turns out all my friends have been quietly saving theirs and now have a nice big monet pot to give their DC when they turn 18!
Now I feel horrifically guilty that my DC wo t get that, when all their friends will.
Oh help, really panicking.
I will never, ever be in the financial situation to pay £16,000 back to them.
The money goes in to my account each month and first it got spent on nappies, food, supplementing my reduced income, then when they went to school it got used for school uniform, new shoes, clubs, food, etc.
Suddenly 12 years has crept up on me and I haven't saved a penny of it.
Only 4 years of CHB to go now and then it stops!! I feel like I've seriously failed my DC.

Child benefit is paid towards the cost of bringing up children, ie feeding them, clothing them, etc. it’s not meant to be saved up. A huge proportion of the population won’t have been able to afford to put it away in savings. If you can afford to start putting money away in savings now for your children, then do so, but that’s not the purpose of child benefit.

The point of it is to help with the costs of having a child not to be saved. If everyone is saving it you could argue they didn't need the benefit in the first place.
If it makes you feel any better we spend ours too. Also if you have more than 1 child the second gets less benefit which wouldn't be fair

My DM back in the 70s and 80s as a single mum certainly spent her child benefit on us and didn’t save it!

I know one friend/neighbour who a long time ago said she spent her child benefit on getting her hair cut and coloured (husband earned enough so they didn’t really need CB). Nothing wrong there either.

It was never their money though. It was for you to spend on them and you did. Some people can afford to save for their children and others can't. Forget about the child benefit and focus on building your savings and savings for your children (if you can afford to).

If your friends' children are in their teens, are you sure they aren't talking about the Child Trust Fund? If the children were born between 2002- 2011, it could be that they are talking about.

I'm struggling to believe this thread is real, and not just some plant to get people wound up about how we should lower the CB threadshold because clearly a lot of families are getting it who don't need it if it's being used as a fun fund for young adults.

Yes. They will.

The problem is presenting it as some virtuous narrative about ‘saving the CB because it’s for the children’. That’s just being an arse.

Could be this yes.

OP honestly don’t feel guilty either way.

That was my thought when I read it too. I imagine it will show up in the Dail Mail shortly to rile up their readers too 🙄

This is a pretty infuriating thread as someone who earns too much to be eligible but not enough that I would have been able to just squirrel it away for 18 years.

But it's meant for their use, not for savings. That's why it's means tested - it's really meant for parents who need the money, not parents who can afford to save it.

Ours went on the kids and helped us not get into debt, especially in the nursery years, so I am grateful for it.

That’s what it’s for, to help with the costs of bringing up children, not a savings scheme

It never occurred to me to save it for them. That's not what it's for. If you feel that they are likely yo go into higher education and will not receive a loan, I would start saving to contribute but otherwise don't worry about it.

YABU and ridiculous to be panicking at a time when lots of people can’t feed their kids about not being able to give them £20k. Get a grip honestly.

Your friends are an argument for CB being means tested. Why should the taxpayer fund a nest egg for people’s kids?

Ive saved not a penny of it for my 2 and feel not the slightest guilt. It was spent on them for living our lives

The thought had occurred.

In case it ends up in the DM or similar, either by accident or design, I'm going to share now that in our house we pay extra pension contributions to ensure we stay below the threshold to claim the full amount.

You've spent it presumably on your children? On making their lives more comfortable and enjoyable? Don't beat yourself up about it.

I agree.

Exactly.

It is means tested.

I know a family with 2 young children who save the child benefit every month. But they live in a really bad small rented house. Imo housing should be prioritised i cant understand this.
.I have 3 children mine was used to feed school expensive activity (now given up) the next 2 years it will be used for maths grinds for ds16.

If you can afford to save the child benefit then you don't need it. I don't get a penny but I doubt I'll be able to hand over 20k to my kids. YABU

Don’t worry!
You have actually used it for the purpose it was created for - new shoes for the kids, food, clothes etc. It’s given to the main carer for that very reason.

Not sure how the people who have saved it all are going to transfer into their child’s account as lump sums - because you’re only supposed to be able to gift £3k to another person per year.

Only starts to be if one parent earns more than £50k. If many people are still qualifying for it and it gets squirreled away as a nest egg the threshold needs lowered.

Not everyone is in the position to stash away child benefit; I know I wasn’t. You’ve spent on what it was intended for and the purpose of it is not for a lump sum at 18

CB is awarded to those with children, No other purpose is specified.