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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

A woman is a woman

734 replies

EmotionSickness · 06/10/2023 07:29

For those who have been following the Tory conference and general themes of their speeches…

How do you feel about Sunak’s speech?

I know there has been a lot of discussion on here from those who didn’t want to vote for a party that didn’t know the definition of a woman.

Rishi has stated clearly that “a woman is a woman and a man is a man.” While I’d argue that still isn’t a definition, per se, he is appeasing this way of thinking.

So I’m just wondering. Is this enough for you to vote Tory at the next election?

OP posts:
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ArabellaScott · 06/10/2023 09:39

EmotionSickness · 06/10/2023 09:35

If they pick up on this thread, then I do also hope that 😂

They'll be more interested in floating voters.

And possibly, hearing what they actually need to do to gain those votes.

bemorelemmy · 06/10/2023 09:40

ViolettaVonVargon · 06/10/2023 07:33

No one ever admits to voting Tory on mumsnet, it’s just a klaxon to get abuse. Obviously lots do though otherwise they wouldn’t have spent the last 13 years in power

so true- the amount of abuse on here is unreal

PenhillDarkMonarch · 06/10/2023 09:41

Sunak would say the sky was Green if he thought it would win him the next election.

How anyone thinks he stands for anything except his own power is beyond me. He was literally right in the centre of the lot that had their greasy hands in the tax pot paying all their mates for shit PPE that went to landfill almost immediately. When they weren't doing that, they were busy partying and sleeping with each other.

He'd like us to forget he was there for the parties and the thieving or to believe somehow all this went on with the CoE knowing, but that's just plain old bullshit to me.

babyproblems · 06/10/2023 09:43

No.
For anyone that still thinks voting Tory is a good option, please listen to the Boris Johnson episodes by British Scandal podcast channel! And then watch State of Chaos on BBC. Just a complete joke and so damaging to everyone.

EasternStandard · 06/10/2023 09:44

EmotionSickness · 06/10/2023 09:35

If they pick up on this thread, then I do also hope that 😂

There was another one that had a poll

But it got moved as not AIBU enough

Helleofabore · 06/10/2023 09:44

LadyWithLapdog · 06/10/2023 08:30

No, not voting Tory.

For those who don’t read the DM, although it was reported in the Telegraph and the Herald as well

I would check that carefully over the next months if I were you. There was great celebration that Starmer said it but after he did, the questions started. Let's just see what Starmer says over the Labour conference. There are still significant issues, women in my local Labour Party are reporting back that no discussions can still be had and it is like Starmer's statement never happened, or that it was left so open to interpretation that it was a sleight of hand linguistically. The Women's Labour Declaration was still not allowed a table at conference.

It would be so very good to have Starmer be very clear about this.

ThomasinaLivesHere · 06/10/2023 09:49

No and even if I wanted to vote Tory it’d be a wasted vote as it’s just between SNP and labour where I live. In the recent by-election in Scotland the tories did so badly they lost their deposit 😂.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 06/10/2023 09:52

CatusFlatus · 06/10/2023 08:59

Your final paragraph is very telling and is straight out of the 60's and 70's labour / union playbook.

Tell women you'll get round to addressing their concerns once you've sorted out the important stuff (which means never) with a side of belittlment and ridicule. Nice.

What are you talking about? Every bit of Flightorflounder's post was centre-ing women and women's issues.

The last paragraph might not have hit the spot for you but the access to womens' spaces very much focused on using women's toilets so I imagine that's the reference point.

It's time to focus on women and protecting them and their safe spaces. Why aren't men doing more to help and support transwomen?

LadyWithLapdog · 06/10/2023 09:52

@Helleofabore How was it open to interpretation? He used the exact words people have wanted to hear. I hope he does clarify further, if needed. I don’t know the internal workings of the party, but let’s hope they’ve learnt something after the Corbyn debacle, such as living in reality.

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 06/10/2023 09:52

ElleCapitaine · 06/10/2023 08:30

Oh for heavens sake, the NHS is in meltdown, schools are stretched beyond coping, there’s raw sewage in our waters, we are living through the biggest cost of living crisis since WW2, and we are being shat upon from a great height by a corrupt government. I couldn’t give a flying fuck if a man wants to wear a dress and call himself Brenda. The gender issue is a sideshow in politics, not the main event. Something needs to change.

This. This is my whole feelings on the matter.

As a woman I want safe spaces, but honestly-when was the last time you felt unsafe in a bathroom? I never have.

The NHS is on its knees and I work in it, the choice of schools my 11 year old had to start year 7 in were shit, shitter and shittiest (there were 3). The junior school he just moved up from had its funding slashed again. They couldn’t even take them on a trip to the local attraction as an end of year 6 treat. The cost of living crisis meant they refused to ask the parents to contribute because they have several families who are relying on food banks and the local community swap shop to clothe their children. I’m refusing to put my heating on until the temp goes below 5 degrees.

These are the issues affecting me. Not whether John wants to wear a dress and call himself Brenda

Bedbouncer · 06/10/2023 09:54

ahtred · 06/10/2023 07:36

No, as much as the trans issue infuriates and worries me, it's not the key issue I will be voting over, allowing the Tories back in over what is actually quite small issue (especially now I feel common sense might actually prevail) would be giving the issue more gravitas than it deserves. I won't let my vote be swayed to this horrific government because of this intensely irritating situation.

I don't think it is "actually quite small issue". I think it's a huge matter whether or not people feel free to tell the truth about what they perceive, and is completely undermining confidence in various fields, including science, which frightens me.
I still won't be voting for this bunch of incompetent, money-grabbing, manipulative buffoons though. They've shown us how they run the country. To say I'm not impressed would be a massive understatement.

MargotBamborough · 06/10/2023 09:55

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 06/10/2023 09:52

This. This is my whole feelings on the matter.

As a woman I want safe spaces, but honestly-when was the last time you felt unsafe in a bathroom? I never have.

The NHS is on its knees and I work in it, the choice of schools my 11 year old had to start year 7 in were shit, shitter and shittiest (there were 3). The junior school he just moved up from had its funding slashed again. They couldn’t even take them on a trip to the local attraction as an end of year 6 treat. The cost of living crisis meant they refused to ask the parents to contribute because they have several families who are relying on food banks and the local community swap shop to clothe their children. I’m refusing to put my heating on until the temp goes below 5 degrees.

These are the issues affecting me. Not whether John wants to wear a dress and call himself Brenda

Lucky you, you've never felt unsafe in the women's toilets.

That's because you've never met Katie Dolatowski in there.

dianamoonyan · 06/10/2023 09:56

I don't tend to vote on a single issue and I don't support the conservatives at all but unless Labour make it clear that they understand that women don't have a penis and pledge that they will secure women's single sex spaces and prevent the medical abuse of children then I won't be voting for them either.

SoShallINever · 06/10/2023 09:58

BadBarry · 06/10/2023 09:37

So far they are the best on offer, that's not to mean I wouldn't choose another party if I could I just don't see a better option right now.

Jesus wept.
They have crashed the economy. There needs to a public enquiry into the billions they have wasted in the HS2 debacle. Housing crisis, NHS in absolute tatters, kids in utter poverty.
Water companies pouring sewage into waterways without any consequences.
Backhanders to their mates running oilfields when actually our country is already running mainly on renewables and renewable energy is cheaper
Partying when I couldn't see my own dying relative. Handing contracts to friends of friends.

They are the biggest group of self serving bastards this country has ever had in charge.

Ask yourself why Rishi the billionaire wants to work full time in a job that pays £160k if it isn't to protect his own wealth.

How the fuck can you say there is no alternative? A group of sixth form politics students could do a better job.

Ostryga · 06/10/2023 09:58

I’m as GC as they come, but would never vote Tory.

If you’re voting Tory just because they say a woman is a woman then you’re throwing millions of women under the bus, far more will suffer at the hands of the Tories than any trans rights would ever cause.

It would come off as pure transphobia to me to vote Tory based on one policy.

Fran2023 · 06/10/2023 10:02

No.

And actually if you interrogate the statement it is not actually saying what some think it is. All it says is ‘a woman is a woman.’ It is not giving any definition of what a woman is, so Sunak retains plausible deniability when challenged.

Willing to be proved wrong if he talked in greater detail in his speech, as my tolerance of wind bagging politicians is so low that I haven’t listened to the whole speech.

PosterBoy · 06/10/2023 10:03

It's more the other way round.
I can't vote for a party that thinks men can become women.
So that only leaves the Tories or no vote

Chesq · 06/10/2023 10:04

SeptemberSuns · 06/10/2023 08:46

Yep utterly tedious, ill-informed, transphobic attitudes. Go back to the 1950s where you could live your best racist, misogynistic, homophobic lives too.

Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and opinions. Just because someone doesn't agree with your opinion does not automatically make them a bigot or transphobic. Many people, including myself, have religious beliefs which conflict with this issue and denying them that or persecuting someone for hold a religious belief is racist. Have your opinion but don't force it on others though.

TeenDivided · 06/10/2023 10:04

Ostryga · 06/10/2023 09:58

I’m as GC as they come, but would never vote Tory.

If you’re voting Tory just because they say a woman is a woman then you’re throwing millions of women under the bus, far more will suffer at the hands of the Tories than any trans rights would ever cause.

It would come off as pure transphobia to me to vote Tory based on one policy.

Why would it be transphobic to want to support a party that understands women's sex based rights?

There are lots of reasons not to vote Tory, but saying it is transphobic to support women's sex based rights does not make sense.

blameless · 06/10/2023 10:05

longwayoff · 06/10/2023 07:59

As if. I'd be more reassured if he knew what the duties of a PM are, thus developing policies that ensure the population has adequate access to housing and enough food to eat. Not interested in any statement he cares to make about genitalia.

This appears to sum up everything about modern politics, worldwide.
Just over half of the UK are biologically female, yet no party seems interested in this demographic.
No politician of any stripe gives a damn about what voters want, they just want to be less unpopular than the competition, every four or five years - after which they don't even have to show up at the workplace.

LadyWithLapdog · 06/10/2023 10:05

@dianamoonyan https://www.lbc.co.uk/news/keir-starmer-woman-adult-female-trans-labour-party/ here’s another link and let’s hope there’ll be more over the coming months. Meanwhile, have a look at what the Tories have done. Not in a whataboutery way but because they truly have shat on everything: sewage in rivers, NHS waiting lists, the poverty, corruption, “culture wars” they so love to stoke and an endless list of other things.

Keir Starmer insists a woman is an ‘adult female’ as he says gender self-identification is not ‘right way forward’

The Labour leader has said that he believes a woman is an ‘adult female’ as he was quizzed on gender during a recent interview.

https://www.lbc.co.uk/news/keir-starmer-woman-adult-female-trans-labour-party/

EasternStandard · 06/10/2023 10:05

Ostryga · 06/10/2023 09:58

I’m as GC as they come, but would never vote Tory.

If you’re voting Tory just because they say a woman is a woman then you’re throwing millions of women under the bus, far more will suffer at the hands of the Tories than any trans rights would ever cause.

It would come off as pure transphobia to me to vote Tory based on one policy.

If you are ‘GC as they come’ why do you find the statement transphobic?

Chonkadoodle · 06/10/2023 10:07

I’d rather stick my head in a deep fat fryer than vote Tory.

Graciebobcat · 06/10/2023 10:07

TeenDivided · 06/10/2023 10:04

Why would it be transphobic to want to support a party that understands women's sex based rights?

There are lots of reasons not to vote Tory, but saying it is transphobic to support women's sex based rights does not make sense.

It's not too far a stretch to think that a lot of people in local Conservative associations will be transphobic though. And also sexist, racist, disablist and homophobic. Their own MPs and local councillors often come out with comments along these lines too.

KissKiss29 · 06/10/2023 10:07

I was always pro-labour and have voted for them all my life but now I am politically homeless. I don't believe a word from any of them.

I am glad he made the statement though as it opens up a wider conversation that needs to happen.