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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Airbnb host opens my private bedroom door

106 replies

GlitterGlobe30 · 06/10/2023 02:13

I've just started staying at this Airbnb and the host is very particular about her house rules (didn't know until after I started staying here).

One of her rules is to leave the bedroom window open everytime I leave the apartment (preferably just leave it open at all times) to air the room out and let the air circulate through because she doesn't like any smells settling in the room.

I started to leave the window open everytime I left the apartment but then she said that wasn't enough to help the air circulate and I have to leave my bedroom door open too. I feel uncomfortable with this as I have all my stuff in the room including valuable things like passport and laptop etc. It is just sharing the apartment with her but she also has her boyfriend round almost every day. And I don't like the thought of either of them nosying at my stuff when I'm not in the apartment. I came home today to find my bedroom door wide open when I had just left it open a bit when I left the apartment for the day. She actually said it would be fine to just leave it open a crack and then obviously changed her mind.

Aibu to think I should be able to keep my bedroom door shut whenever I want and to feel a bit uncomfortable with not having the privacy?

OP posts:

Monty27 · 06/10/2023 02:21

Absolutely demand your privacy and tell her you won't be back if those demands aren't met.

WereYouListeningToTheDudesStory · 06/10/2023 02:21

That sounds hideous! I'd be leaving a warning review for other potential guests.

Out of interest, has anyone mentioned anything in the previous reviews?

66rabbits · 06/10/2023 02:25

I'd be very suspicious of this. Why does she need the door to be open to air the room when the window is already open??

Bleuuuughhh · 06/10/2023 02:41

Bonkers.

Aria999 · 06/10/2023 02:44

This is why Airbnb that isn't whole house would really creep me out. Can you move?

MariaLuna · 06/10/2023 02:49

Weirdo's like that is why I don't do Airbnb.

You're basically leaving yourself vulnerable to all kinds.

Hotels all the way. Always got reception 24/7.

Unrealnotunrealistic · 06/10/2023 02:50

Please don’t stand for this - you are paying them your hard-earned cash to trespass.

Mothership4two · 06/10/2023 02:53

Unless you were informed about this (window and door) before you got there - doesn't sound like you were - I wouldn't be complying OP. Window left open when you are out is fine as long as you aren't coming back to a cold room, unless someone could access the room through the window. I would keep the door firmly shut.

avocadonny · 06/10/2023 03:19

66rabbits · 06/10/2023 02:25

I'd be very suspicious of this. Why does she need the door to be open to air the room when the window is already open??

If it's only a small window I can understand, but such rules should be made known and obvious before booking

user1477391263 · 06/10/2023 03:21

There seem to be a lot of AirBnB hosts who seem to be under the impression that this is supposed to be a completely passive income stream where they collect rents and do what they like in return.

Lizzieregina · 06/10/2023 03:21

Not only would I not be leaving the door open, I would be expecting to lock it! This is ridiculous.

Original poster

GlitterGlobe30 · 06/10/2023 03:22

It's not a small window at all, it's massive. And nothing was in the listing about not being able to shut my own private room door - if there was I wouldn't have booked it

OP posts:

saythatagaintome · 06/10/2023 03:25

OP; this is really, really weird! When did you move in? You should find a new place to go to. Airbnb will refund you if you act soon. Explain what’s going on and raise the privacy issues.

Codlingmoths · 06/10/2023 03:28

You have to talk to her and raise it with Airbnb too. Explain you feel unsafe and all your things are exposed both to host and her boyfriend but also to anyone walking past the huge open window. As far as host goes you explain to her this will be up factual review. You didn’t book knowing these rules, wouldn’t have booked if she’d put them on the listing and won’t be sticking to them at all unless she can accept a closed door at all times.

Mothership4two · 06/10/2023 03:32

GlitterGlobe30 · 06/10/2023 03:22

It's not a small window at all, it's massive. And nothing was in the listing about not being able to shut my own private room door - if there was I wouldn't have booked it

Then I'd keep them shut when you are out. You would not be unreasonable to tell her this.

Mothership4two · 06/10/2023 03:33

And keep window shut if you are in if you want it closed

Original poster

GlitterGlobe30 · 06/10/2023 03:34

I don't think you can trust Airbnb reviews because I've stayed in airbnbs with all good reviews before and had issues like this before. This Airbnb had all good previous reviews. I think the issue might be she had someone stay recently that caused a bad smell in the room so now she's trying to get me to leave my door open. She said she wants the air to be able to circulate through both the open window and the open door. She is a very particular person though as other house rules include always wiping down the sink after use, always leave the toilet seat up after use, never cook after 8pm (again because of the smell). She's just a very particular person, she leaves her bedroom door open too. I don't recommend Airbnb at all but unfortunately I'm single and can't afford a hotel or Airbnb to myself as I don't have anyone to split the cost with. It's not much better with an Airbnb to yourself either though as I did that one time and they had advertised a "private entrance" that they kept walking in and out of!

OP posts:

Mothership4two · 06/10/2023 03:47

I have generally had no complaints with Airbnb except one which was to do with the layout and deceptive photos. Haven't done a room in a house type rent and only rented in England.

Watchkeys · 06/10/2023 04:05

How would she cope if you stayed in all day?

NigelHarmansNewWife · 06/10/2023 04:11

Contact Airbnb - this is so weird I would feel really uncomfortable.

CharlieRight · 06/10/2023 04:14

Obviously barking.

close the door and if she says something tell her that she’s asking too much.

FloofCloud · 06/10/2023 04:21

I'd check out telling her I find in unacceptable and uncomfortable with both your lack of privacy and also the boyfriend of you thought it was just a female share
How long are you thee for?

GaspingGekko · 06/10/2023 04:30

I totally agree with everyone else saying that her opening the door would be an invasion of privacy and that the rule should have been published in advance.
But I would also check that she did actually open the door, I've lived in houses where an open window in one room and another one open elsewhere in the house would cause a slightly open door (which is how you said you left the door) to swing wide open because of the air current.

Ponderingwindow · 06/10/2023 04:37

You are staying in someone else’s home while they are present. It isn’t private. It’s inherently risky to decide to just go stay with strangers. An unlocked interior door isn’t going to protect you or your valuables so if you aren’t in the room it really doesn’t matter if the door is open or closed.

Mothership4two · 06/10/2023 04:42

Yes I would want a lock on the door @Ponderingwindow

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