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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Airbnb host opens my private bedroom door

106 replies

GlitterGlobe30 · 06/10/2023 02:13

I've just started staying at this Airbnb and the host is very particular about her house rules (didn't know until after I started staying here).

One of her rules is to leave the bedroom window open everytime I leave the apartment (preferably just leave it open at all times) to air the room out and let the air circulate through because she doesn't like any smells settling in the room.

I started to leave the window open everytime I left the apartment but then she said that wasn't enough to help the air circulate and I have to leave my bedroom door open too. I feel uncomfortable with this as I have all my stuff in the room including valuable things like passport and laptop etc. It is just sharing the apartment with her but she also has her boyfriend round almost every day. And I don't like the thought of either of them nosying at my stuff when I'm not in the apartment. I came home today to find my bedroom door wide open when I had just left it open a bit when I left the apartment for the day. She actually said it would be fine to just leave it open a crack and then obviously changed her mind.

Aibu to think I should be able to keep my bedroom door shut whenever I want and to feel a bit uncomfortable with not having the privacy?

OP posts:
jenpil · 07/10/2023 01:07

OP, what are you going to do when the weather gets colder?

It's October now, and in another couple of weeks it'll be lower than 10°C at night.

A few weeks after that, it'll be lower than 10°C during the day.

You can't leave the massive window open all day then, the room will be freezing and it'll never get warm!

What smells is she actually worried about anyway? Most smells disappear after the window has been open for 10 mins or so. That's long enough to give a bedroom an airing.

Azandme · 07/10/2023 01:09

DP stayed in an Airbnb recently, two small unmentioned in the listing children lived there. In itself not an issue.

First day the small children went in his room and rummaged in his bag.

Second night the father messaged DP to end our very quiet phone call at 10pm - in case it woke the children up! They had the children in with them, but left their bedroom door wide open.

Madness!

Original poster
GlitterGlobe30 · 07/10/2023 01:21

She invited me out with her friends this evening but I said no as I'm not a big fan of nights out anyway. I have a feeling she just didn't want me in the apartment by myself which is why she invited me. Got home to find a random pair of earphones on my bedroom floor. When I gave them back to her she said they must've fallen out of her pocket when she got some boxes out from under the bed. Even weirder is that boxes wouldn't even fit in the space underneath the bed anyway unless they were flat packed. I'm going to have to start looking for somewhere else to move. This is just so annoying having to move around all the time because Airbnb hosts seem to be so dense at not knowing the difference between right and wrong with what is okay and how to treat their guests. Not the first time I've had to move airbnbs. I'm supposed to be here a month. It's an Airbnb in Canada for anyone interested. I think these people just think it's their house so they get to do whatever they want.

OP posts:
Middleagedmeangirls · 07/10/2023 02:20

Meh. I couldn't get worked up about this. As long as I could keep the door shut when I was actually in the room it wouldn't bother me. It's not as if leaving it open when you are out makes it less secure. After all once you are gone the host and her bf could nip in and rifle through your stuff whether the door is open a tiny bit, wide open or shut.

SequentialAnalyst · 07/10/2023 02:59

I would be very unhappy about this.
Can't AirB&B do anything about it?

JobMatch3000 · 07/10/2023 03:43

Why is she going in your room and putting stuff in/out of storage? For the period you are renting the room that should be your own private space and I would expect a lock on the door so you can secure your belongings when you are not there.
I think you need to find somewhere else to stay. Try SpareRooms rather than AirBnB.

draxdomax · 07/10/2023 03:55

Until you said it's in Canada, I though you were talking about one of my previous landlords.

Being a landlord isn't for everyone. Yes, getting some extra money from your property is great but - you are providing a service!
It's someone temporary home, not a prison!

Ridiculous!

SatsumaPatata · 07/10/2023 06:15

Tell her you need the door and window to be secure and closed for travel insurance purposes and if they aren’t, she’s liable for any losses. Remind her that Air BnB rules are that it’s your private space, you should be able to lock the door and she shouldn’t be entering it during your stay. If she has a problem with any of that too bad, Air BnB need to move you.

We had a problem with an Air BnB booking recently and they had us in another property the same day.

Dery · 07/10/2023 06:41

“Why is she going in your room and putting stuff in/out of storage? For the period you are renting the room that should be your own private space and I would expect a lock on the door so you can secure your belongings when you are not there.”

This. She’s totally out of order on this and you have no security with a host like her.

Batalax · 07/10/2023 06:43

definitely complain to Airbnb

SunflowersAndSmellyTrainers · 07/10/2023 07:22

I think for my own peace of mind/safety, in your situation, I'd invest in a small discrete portable cctv camera to monitor the room whilst you are away from your air bnb @GlitterGlobe30

CharlotteBog · 07/10/2023 07:23

Have you communicated with Airbnb yet op?

rookiemere · 07/10/2023 07:25

I believe Airbnb was conceived originally as more of a meeting people and widening your network through staying at people's houses. Over the last few years it has become a mainstream letting service.

Sounds like host sees you as pals, rather than someone she is providing a service to at a cost and as such you should definitely find somewhere else.

AlwaysIntrigued · 07/10/2023 07:32

I’m an occasional Airbnb host in my home and believe me when I say this is weird. Being a host means that you want people to be comfortable, you give them all the privacy they need and never go into their rooms. This host is wanting the money but not meeting her part of the bargain. If you have more nights there I would see what else is available, flag this up with Airbnb and then tell her you don’t feel it’s the accommodation for you and that you’re leaving. Absolutely leave a review afterwards.

topnoddy · 07/10/2023 08:08

Get the hell out of there and demand a refund

HandbagMarinara · 07/10/2023 08:13

I've voted YABU because an unlocked door doesn't really matter if it is open or closed, your stuff is just as vulnerable.

For me the issue is no lock. I wouldn't be staying.

As for why leaving it open, I imagine they have a condensation damp problem.

43ontherocksporfavor · 07/10/2023 08:13

Would never stay in a room in a house as even if you shut the door, she can open it.

Viviennemary · 07/10/2023 08:19

When you leave put this in your review. She is totally in the wrong here. Your privacy and security should be of paramount importance.

Viviennemary · 07/10/2023 08:20

When you leave put this in your review. She is totally in the wrong here. Your privacy and security should be of paramount importance.

Pocketfullofdogtreats · 07/10/2023 09:56

I had a problem with an Airbnb (building work not noted in the post), found somewhere else and moved out. Phoned Airbnb, saying I wouldn't have booked it if I'd known. Airbnb were brilliant and refunded most of the money within 12 hours. So you could at least ask them to have a word with her about boundaries and privacy. Good luck x

Pocketfullofdogtreats · 07/10/2023 09:57

It's all very well talking about reviews, but the OP needs a solution now.

Hibiscrubbed · 07/10/2023 10:03

Meh. I couldn't get worked up about this

Is there any more irritating Mumsnet response than the one above, when a poster asks a reasonable question on here?

CharlotteBog · 07/10/2023 10:06

Pocketfullofdogtreats · 07/10/2023 09:57

It's all very well talking about reviews, but the OP needs a solution now.

It doesn't look like she's tried to contact Airbnb - that's the first thing to do

zingally · 07/10/2023 10:10

This is why, as a lone female traveller, who stays away for work at least 3 times a year, up to a week each time... why I ALWAYS stay in hotels, and never Airbnbs.

OP, you've no ties to this woman, or this place. Move somewhere else.

WillowCraft · 07/10/2023 10:13

If you're out and it's not a security risk or cold I don't see the issue really . The host does the same with her own door. Yes it's a bit weird but air bnbs where you share with the host always are. They are quite often filthy, noisy, there is never a lock on the door, the hosts often want to have extended conversations about their difficult ex's or bad work situations. There are often strange rules about kitchen and bathroom use. It's supposedly significantly cheaper than a hotel to make it worth the aggravation

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