Cost of living. I'm having a meltdown tonight.

[TwentyTwenty20]

I put my heating on for an hour or so this morning because I forgot to dry my son's school uniform, and my landlord won't let me install a tumble dryer. It cost me an extra £2. I didn't put my heating on until January last year. We lived under the duvet until then. I got my son changed under the covers. I used to just get in the bath and stay there in the evening to keep warm. I'm a lone parent, I take home £2100 a month and get £140 UC, £96 child benefit. My rent is £1000 a month. Council tax £150 with SP discount. Electric, gas, petrol, car insurance, Internet, school uniform, food, life insurance, water bills, £130 on before and after school clubs so I can work, then there's failed MOT which I had to put on a credit card which I'm paying off, tv license, phone bill etc. Then there's life and scraping by so my son can continue his gymnastics hes been doing since he was 2. Council is awful and you can't apply for any of the cost of living stuff unless they have 'identified you'. I've done income and expenditure with a professional and they've said I've pretty much cut back as far as I can. They fine tooth combed my bank statements. How is the amount I make not enough? I have applied for 6 cheaper houses in the last month and none will rent to me. I'm 400 and something on the list for council housing. 10 years ago I was on 18k a year and comfortable and saving.

Will this ever get better? That's a genuine question because I can do all the cutting back I can but if I keep getting knocked back for cheaper housing and higher paid jobs I just don't know how I will go on. It is no life and I don't enjoy getting out of bed in the morning anymore.

Her landlord won't allow that it's subletting the last thing she needs is an eviction order.

@Widower2014 you need a TV license to stream TV channels even if on demand (BBC iPlayer for example). Other services like Netflix or Amazon Prime come with a fee as well.

If you don't watch live TV or BBC iPlayer you don't need a TV licence.

Wtaf , the country’s on its needs and you’re suggesting people don’t work and just claim benefits?

Which is what - ITVx, My 5, Channel 4, and Youtube?

That's really interesting... inspiring to know it can be done, as those countries are completely ahead of the game, including on other issues such as education and the justice system. In fact they score highest in the 2023 Kids Rights Index of 193 countries who signed up to the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, whereas where do you think the UK scored? 179!!! Out of 193!!! We need wholesale change in this country but for that there needs to be an appetite for it and sadly I don't see it... sadly for our children in particular.

https://www.kidsrights.org/research/kidsrights-index/

And there are some really helpful posts on here, and I’ve nothing to add to those.
But sone are utterly insulting and very unkind to someone who feels at their wits end. She parents alone, works full time and despite being a renter, is told to get a lodger, get a one bed place and bunk in with her child or move…which is not actually free to do!
So yes, I’m hoping my post does help the OP by showing some solidarity and diluting the poor blame and shame response on this thread,
The ones from people who are offering genuine and proportionate advice - they’re great.

You only need a tv license to stream bbc I player. All other streaming services and channels you don’t need a tv license. We don’t have one because we don’t have an aerial and we don’t watch bbc iplayer. Tv license people ask when you cancel why you’re cancelling and if they disagree they will come and talk to you, they agreed that we didn’t need a tv license.

We mainly use channel 4, itv x, Netflix and Disney plus. We were using and watching all these aswell as paying for a tv license even though we don’t watch live or bbc.
so we have saved the tv license fee, we aren’t paying out more for Netflix etc because we were already paying for these.

I understand - but if you don't have Netflix or Disney+ (Which OP doesn't) and you have a 4-year-old - what is there to watch? It is my genuine question, not sarcasm. YouTube is difficult to monitor consistently with short cartoons, ITVx has some programs but not all on demand, I never watch My5 so no idea, and is on Channel 4 anything worth watching for a kid?

No idea I don't have a TV. But I can't imagine the op has much time to watch any of it live.

I sympathise OP. I’m a single parent too and it’s frustrating when people on these threads say ‘can you skill up and get a promotion?’ As if no one ever thought of that.

Generally people would earn more if they could.

I earn a lot more now than 2 years ago but feel poorer. I used to do ok, pay my bills fine and have money left over for socialising, treats etc. We used to be able to afford to eat out for birthdays etc (3 dc) but now that’s out of the question. I can’t believe I earn more but am worse off.

@Namddf absolutely agree. When you have kids it's tricky isn't it working more hours but then it costs you for breakfast club and holiday camps. I'm a single mum to one and quite frankly it isn't worth my while to just work my hours not to mention DS school doesn't even have an after school provision. People suggest silly things 🙄

If I didn’t have Disney and Netflix they would probably just watch dvds if we didn’t have a tv channel they want to watch. But on itv isn’t there kids programmes, in the night garden etc? I don’t know because like I said we have Disney and Netflix. But if the op isn’t watching live and isn’t watching on bbc I player then tv license is a saving to be made regardless of what the kids will watch. Because I’m assuming whatever they watch now may well be available on an app somewhere streamed, and not live.

Are you sure you aren’t eligible for UC? With 2 DC and earnings of £2100 you would be. Potentially a significant amount if you receive DLA for your DC with ASD &/or you have childcare costs.

Existing is not what we aspired to do in the 21st century.

Agree you should be eligible for some UC.

I'm not. I've run the figures through a benefits calculator and I'm not eligible for any UC because I'm an Owner Occupier not a renter. If I were a renter I'd be able to claim some housing element.

You must earn more than £2100 then. Because here is a manual calculation based on the minimum amounts.

Standard element £292.11
Child element x2 £269.58 x2
Total = £831.27

£2100 - £631 (work allowance) = £1469
£1469 x 0.55 = £807.95 (earnings deduction)
£831.27 - £807.95 = £23.32 (UC award)

More, potentially much more, if any of the following apply: you are over 25, DC1 was born before 6/4/17, you receive DLA for DC with ASD, you have childcare costs.

Afternoon. Please do keep posts here on the helpful side - OP started the thread asking for help as she is struggling, so do bear that in mind.
We'd like to keep this thread up as there are lots of useful posts here which could help others in the same boat - so please do stick to our Talk Guidelines.

OP Have skimmed through the thread so apologies if it's been suggested previously. Do you have a Community Fridge near you? It's not means tested, anyone can use them and it may provide a little bit of immediate help without any form filling.

Really hope things improve for you.

Hi, the first thing is to try and lower your rent, that would help alot, are your friends at all with your landlord? Just if you are one way of getting higher up on council list is for him to issue am evection notice, as you cant just leave or you will become intentionally homeless, and all depending on area etc.but if the landlord issue you with an evection notice housing would have to get involved it may mean living in bnbs for a while or temp housing but at least would get you secure accommodation that you can live in for the rest of your life at a rent you can afford? And maybe have a look at bennfits again and see what else they have to offer like are you claiming back childcare costs? I know you said you have looked at payments you makes etc already but maybe again things like mobile phones, can get contracts from sky for sim only got only £4, and just continue using the phone you have that's a big saving, things like internet/TV insurance check again and see if you can get cheaper anywhere else it's so awful being in this situation.. I am so sorry your going through this, I hope this helps in anyway... xx