Cost of living. I'm having a meltdown tonight.

[TwentyTwenty20]

I put my heating on for an hour or so this morning because I forgot to dry my son's school uniform, and my landlord won't let me install a tumble dryer. It cost me an extra £2. I didn't put my heating on until January last year. We lived under the duvet until then. I got my son changed under the covers. I used to just get in the bath and stay there in the evening to keep warm. I'm a lone parent, I take home £2100 a month and get £140 UC, £96 child benefit. My rent is £1000 a month. Council tax £150 with SP discount. Electric, gas, petrol, car insurance, Internet, school uniform, food, life insurance, water bills, £130 on before and after school clubs so I can work, then there's failed MOT which I had to put on a credit card which I'm paying off, tv license, phone bill etc. Then there's life and scraping by so my son can continue his gymnastics hes been doing since he was 2. Council is awful and you can't apply for any of the cost of living stuff unless they have 'identified you'. I've done income and expenditure with a professional and they've said I've pretty much cut back as far as I can. They fine tooth combed my bank statements. How is the amount I make not enough? I have applied for 6 cheaper houses in the last month and none will rent to me. I'm 400 and something on the list for council housing. 10 years ago I was on 18k a year and comfortable and saving.

Will this ever get better? That's a genuine question because I can do all the cutting back I can but if I keep getting knocked back for cheaper housing and higher paid jobs I just don't know how I will go on. It is no life and I don't enjoy getting out of bed in the morning anymore.

Thank you, I know you mean well but I have got my shopping cut down to the bare bones. I shop in Aldi and Asda, my Asda rewards is already enough to pay for Christmas.

One of my children is autistic and another has allergies which bumps food costs up further. We end a week with almost zero waste, and the day before shopping day is a "clear the fridge out" dinner day. Equally we all hate "batch cook and freeze" food, everyone says do it but it's revolting and not for us, nevermind I just do not have the time to waste standing in the kitchen batch cooking.

Cleaning products I shop around for. I don't use wipes and never have done, my washing detergent is Aldi own brand.

My shopping is not where my expenses lay. My car is not where my expenses lay. It's the cumulative effect of running a household as a single parent and not being allowed to claim any form of support that is where the problem lays. It's that men are not held accountable for childcare costs and don't have to sacrifice their earning potential or income and pay the bare minimum that is where the problem lays. I'm angry that by doing the right thing I'm putting my kids at risk.

You don’t need a 20 minute hot shower with loads of soap, hair washing etc. every day. You do need a quick wash for arm pits, nether regions, feet. It is basic hygiene and these areas do smell, especially if you don’t use wet wipes/a bidet which most people don’t.

Hi just looking at your outgoings. You don't have much room for manoeuvre and I have been there also, I really feel for you.
Do you watch much live TV? If you just use your TV for watching YouTube, Netflix etc you do not require a TV licence. You must fill a form out on their website stating you don't watch live TV as it is being broadcast. You will be sent an email every year asking you to fill out this form again to confirm no changes. Just a thought seeing a lot of people watching catch up and online subscription channels now. I know it's a minimal saving.
Having racked up a lot of debt a few years back i had to think outside the box as I was on my own, broke with 3 kids. I offered friends and family my services as a cleaner, running errands for elderly relatives etc. I actually made a lot of money hiring out my dog as a stud dog there are Facebook pages you can join and advertise your dog! Maybe you don't have a dog but my point is to think about any way you can generate income. Think about anything you can possibly offer, maybe you are good at sewing, or could provide babysitting services? Or dogsitting/walking?
Vinted is great for selling unwanted clothes and there's no fees.
Definitely you should try and use a local food bank if you don't already.
Maybe I've been no help to you, but just know that you are not alone ❤

I no this is not going to be a popular answer but I honestly feel like as a single mum you would be better off not working. U will automatically fall into the help with cost of living, them extra chunks of money really help, the way it is now is so bad an I no the stigma of being on benifits isn't nice but neither is waking up every day to Purley exist, an no it won't get any better this day an age as single parents we have to do what we can to survive an I have found I am better off actually not working as terrible as that sounds

Something I’ve started doing and it’s really helped - from what’s left per week after all your bills are paid (inc food and fuel) I try to go Monday - Friday and have 0 spend days, so as long as there is food in the cupboard and patrol in my car and the childcare is covered, I don’t spend anything Monday - Friday. It sounds silly and I imagine a lot of people already do this, but going into week 2 knowing I have my money from the week before makes you feel much less stressed. And so on each week I’m amazed at what I have left over sometimes. Obviously things you can’t control Tyres / school uniforms are non negotiables I get that. All mine and my kids clothes are Vinted / primark, food shop I only buy set meals, and I’ll walk somewhere rather than take car if possible, all very small little tips that can make life a little easier ❤️

Yes you're right probably does depend on the insulation of the house. I found it to be cheaper last year, my tumble dryer was extortionate, I'd leave the dehumidifier on and it would cost me less than a £1 for the whole day. Like you said it depends tho, I live in a flat which is less than 10 years old

You also will automatically qualify for the housing support fund from the council, an you will be able to apply for a discretionary housing payments for your housing Benifit, you should go to the entitled to website an take the little quiz an see what u would be getting not working to what you are working an I think Ul see your better off financially not working. I no that will get a back lash on this forum but who cares times are hard an u gotta do whats best for Ur situation we don't all have perfect family set ups an a nice income do what u need to to help Ur mental health an have a little more to live on each month

😂😂😂 not showering doesn’t mean I’m not washing or I’m not clean… I am saying I don’t shower every day. I don’t smell, I am clean. More people should try it, they may see a lowering of gas and water bills. And they would find, like me that they are still able to keep clean and not smell.
Christ this is hilarious 🤦🏽‍♀️ it’s literally comical that my hygiene habits (which are good) are eliciting such a response. People are unhappy that a person they don’t know manages to keep clean and hygienic without showering every day 😂😂😂😂😂😂 ridiculous!!

She would get the cost of living payments anyway as she gets UC, anyone who gets UC gets them regardless of whether they work or not. I work full time and get UC and I get the cost of living payments.

Im sure the prime minister is really feeling the effects too. It must be so hard for him…….

I saw it as a sarcastic comment on the pitiful situation in this civilised country, where the rich get richer and the poorer get poorer. With a millionaire PM keeping things nice for his chums only.

I personally wouldn't cut back on your life insurance payments. I think that's very responsible towards your son.

Also, to the suggestion about stopping work, there are longer term considerations like your pension and future career prospects. So again I'd personally stay working and look to upskill so your earning potential can keep increasing going forward. Also perhaps think entrepreneurially - what other skills or strengths could generate income?

I'm so sorry you're in this situation. The system is utterly broken, and you are being thoughtful, proactive and resilient.

Oh, well done. He wasn’t even a PM during Covid.

Because this government are the people who make the decisions that affect the rest of us, while they are living in luxury!

You'd get no one applying for the job! I think I'm alone in saying I think our MPs are paid a fair wage. The job is stressful, highly intrusive on their personal and professional lives and involves a lot of travel/time away from home. That's without the potential to absolutely ruin your life if you make an unpopular decision. Would anyone on here do that for £27k a year?

Oh sorry I missed that bit.

I am not sure how much this will help but I was wondering how much it costs to run a bath rather than take a shower, and whether not having a bath and buying one of those oodie copies from Primark might be a better way to keep warm this winter. Last winter we used our cost of living payment on one for each of our family and then didn't use the heating (unless someone was ill) but we didn't feel cold so for me it was well worth it. If you do do that, make sure it is lined with something substantial because some of them are quite thin and that won't do the job. Also if you take your arms out you can get dressed underneath them.

Could you get more uniform for free or cheap so that drying isn't urgent? We give ours to friends and we get given uniform from them too. Also the community fridge here has a uniform swap. It could be worth checking if there is something like that nearby.

The only other thing I noticed was your phone. I pay sim only now and it's about half that so that could maybe be an option when your current contract ends x

But the PMs salary isn't their only income. It comes with a fully expensed property and they won't be paying a lot of personal expenses either.

Plus being the PM will likely lead to a lifetime of lucrative speaking engagments, book deals, consultancies, open doors to any opportunity they could ever want.

Can you pay the credit card off in full each month then use it for food etc. that way you are paying no interest and paying the amount each month still have all the credit if that makes sense?