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AIBU?

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Original poster

I hate when companies use ‘family’ to mean only if you have children

153 replies

Newchangename · 04/10/2023 10:25

I hate it when people use ‘starting a family’ to mean having children. Or when places do ‘family tickets’ or ‘family passes’ and you need to have a child to qualify.

Why are DH and I less of a family because we choose not to have children? It’s hurtful to my friend who desperately tried to have children for years and couldn’t. She doesn’t need a reminder that her family is incomplete/ non- existent because they couldn’t

OP posts:
Gettingbysomehow · 04/10/2023 10:27

It is annoying everything is family this and family that. I had a family but I'm on my own now because I'm divorced and DS has grown up. I'd love to see a meal for one amongst many other things.

AnneLovesGilbert · 04/10/2023 10:29

What else would starting a family mean?

Thewizardbinbag · 04/10/2023 10:31

Family tickets are slightly discounted because they’re usually 2 adults and 2 kids, with a discount for each extra kid.
It’s discounted because there are more people, and because they want to encourage people to bring kids and spend more in the gift shops etc.

You are and your husband are a pair. You don’t get a discount for buying two tickets.

Im a single parent family; one adult and 2 kids. I barely ever get to buy discounted tickets because all family passes are for 2 adults plus kids. I end up paying the same amount for the three of us as a family with a dad in it pays for the 4 of them. But I’m not offended by it, I’m not upset because my family hasn’t been validated. As kindly as possible, it’s time for you to grow up and stop looking for things to be offended by.

Stompythedinosaur · 04/10/2023 10:31

I just think this is a colloquialism that you are reading a lot into.

Family tickets are generally aimed at a "two adult two kid" family, when there are obviously tons of other family set ups out there. But it has to be called something.

A couple without kids are a family unit, but they maybe don't need a special group ticket in the same way as a family with kids does.

7Worfs · 04/10/2023 10:32

Oh ffs.
Corporations changed their maternity policies to “family-friendly” because using the term “women” is apparently offensive to some.
Now the new terms are offensive.

Two adults presumably without the financial burden of children do not need discounts for dependents. They are a couple, or a married couple. Yes, family implies more than two adults and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Legomania · 04/10/2023 10:32

Family literally means adults and their children (obviously coming in a variety of configurations). Two people in a relationship is a couple.

This - and their perceptions of how they are valued in society - is understandably a sensitive subject for some people but they can't just redefine the word because of that.

Thewizardbinbag · 04/10/2023 10:32

Gettingbysomehow · 04/10/2023 10:27

It is annoying everything is family this and family that. I had a family but I'm on my own now because I'm divorced and DS has grown up. I'd love to see a meal for one amongst many other things.

But why would you get a discount for a meal for one? Business give discounts for lager groups because they make more in the long run. They would lose money on a bunch of meals for one taking up tables.

It isn’t a slight against your circumstances. No one is saying you’re lifestyle isn’t valid. But it isn’t a profitable business opportunity so of course you won’t get special deals.

fitzwilliamdarcy · 04/10/2023 10:33

What really grinds my gears is politicians endlessly going on about “hard working families”. What am I (single household), the cat’s mother?

Whereforartthoudave · 04/10/2023 10:34

You want a ‘family’ ticket for you and your DH? Both adults, presumably with incomes?

get a grip. Families with kids get a very slight - and it is slight!- discount because while you and DH pay for 2 people someone with kids is paying for the kids!
I have 2 kids so when we go out for the day we’re paying for almost twice your costs,
when we travel we need 2 hotel rooms, pay for 4 seats on a plane. Unfortunately it’s now frowned upon to stick them up chimneys to help contribute to costs…

UndercoverCop · 04/10/2023 10:35

We have one child, we never get family passes because they are more expensive than paying for two and adults and one child, they are usually aimed at two adults and 2+ children. It's like being offended because you don't get a group discount when you're not in a group.

ImthatBoleyngirl · 04/10/2023 10:35

YABU. It's becoming impossible to say anything without offending someone these days!

FoghornUnicorn · 04/10/2023 10:35

It’s a weird one but I certainly don’t consider my husband to be my family member, as we are just a couple. If we had kids then we would be members of the same family as we would have a person/people that we are both related to in common.

Legomania · 04/10/2023 10:35

fitzwilliamdarcy · 04/10/2023 10:33

What really grinds my gears is politicians endlessly going on about “hard working families”. What am I (single household), the cat’s mother?

That's just shorthand for the impact on earnings caused by having to factor in childcare, surely?

Lovethatforyouhun · 04/10/2023 10:35

The phase they use for you is “Couples”. Maybe stick to adults only hotels and venues so you can’t be offended.

What about one child or single parents? The two adult, two kid tickets don’t help them either, maybe we should start a campaign?! Write to your MP?

Thewizardbinbag · 04/10/2023 10:36

fitzwilliamdarcy · 04/10/2023 10:33

What really grinds my gears is politicians endlessly going on about “hard working families”. What am I (single household), the cat’s mother?

But that’s often in discussions around children in poverty, or benefits which are given due to children in the household, or free school meals etc. A single person household doesn’t require those things.

They should also discuss specially the issues for single people supporting a home with rising costs, but it isn’t as good a soundbite as the family line. You are right, but just quite often they are discussing thing which relate to the impact on children in the home.

7Worfs · 04/10/2023 10:36

fitzwilliamdarcy · 04/10/2023 10:33

What really grinds my gears is politicians endlessly going on about “hard working families”. What am I (single household), the cat’s mother?

If you are single, you are part of your siblings and parents family unit. I bet at work small talk about Christmas etc you say “I’ll visit my family”.

NeedTheSeaside · 04/10/2023 10:37

Because you're 'A couple'.

A 'family' is one/two parents and a child/children.

why isn't 'a couple' a good enough name for your situation, why do you want to be defined as a 'family'??

seems most odd to me.

Discounts are a totally separate thing.

Claraclouds · 04/10/2023 10:37

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines - previously banned poster.

Whereforartthoudave · 04/10/2023 10:37

‘It's like being offended because you don't get a group discount when you're not in a group.’

Exactly! When I go somewhere like the theatre with my parents and sister I’m not offended that we don’t qualify for a ‘family’ discount!
We’re not any less of a family…

Cumbrianlife · 04/10/2023 10:37

There's so many families, including those with DC that don't fit a 'family ticket.' Our eldest was an only child for over 10 years but we eventually went on to have 3DC. It was only for two years we fitted the criteria.
I often go out for the day with a close friend and her two GC. We buy a family ticket, no one is checking birth certificates.

ErrolTheDragon · 04/10/2023 10:37

Or when places do ‘family tickets’ or ‘family passes’ and you need to have a child to qualify.

But how else could these be described? And I'm not sure I've ever seen a 'family' deal which was cheaper than the relevant number of adults or a couples ticket (not many of those on the door, loads of memberships have couples options).

'Family' has more than one meaning, and one for which there's no other obvious term is parent(s) and children.

I'm truly sorry for people this can cause pain to but it is an entirely legitimate and sensible use of language.

fitzwilliamdarcy · 04/10/2023 10:37

7Worfs · 04/10/2023 10:36

If you are single, you are part of your siblings and parents family unit. I bet at work small talk about Christmas etc you say “I’ll visit my family”.

Show quote history

I’m estranged from my family, so no, I don’t.

FiveShelties · 04/10/2023 10:38

It must be so hard work to be offended by everything. I was unable to have children and it never occurred to me to be offended by Family Tickets.

Whereforartthoudave · 04/10/2023 10:38

You’re a childless couple. You get to travel
out of school holiday time and save a fortune, and stay at adult only hotels and resorts.
Can you imagine if I bleated on about the existence of being excluded from adult only experiences because I have kids?

RattlewhenIwalk · 04/10/2023 10:39

What do you think a family is; what do you think a couple is?

People who are hurt by these descriptions need to consider therapy - there are much worse things to worry about.