To ask what are the weirdest questions your kids have asked you.

[QuitChewingMyPlectrum]

In need of a little light relief tonight.
I'll start

1. Do wasps have balls?
2. Can turtles fart?
3. Is arthritis real or made up?

What's the opposite of bacon?

Our son asked me if the big bang was scary, because clearly I was alive when it happened.

He’s been doing sex ed at school (we’re two dads, this is relevent) and he said “if you can’t make a baby, why do you sleep in the same bed?” Also discovered he thinks you’re asleep when you have sex, which is why babies are sometimes a surprise!

What would happen if a cat went to prison.

Me, little girl: 'what's it like when you're dead?'.
Big brother: 'It's the same as it was before you were born'.

It still freaks me out when I remember it. It's my earliest memory.

"Did you get to choose if you wanted to work in a mine or in the chimneys"

I am in my 20s

I find that most questions dd asks start with "in the olden days" I'm late 30s.

Dd also asked me why she couldn't be a chip then cried for 2 hours that she couldn't ever be a chip and she loves chips.

During the pandemic, I talked to my son about the previous flu pandemic of 1918. He asked "did you wear a mask to the shops back then". Bloody cheek.

My youngest (now 14) went through a phase as a toddler of being completely fascinated by cemeteries/graveyards. She'd make me wheel her round the gravestones in her buggy (which we did very quietly and respectfully, I might add. She just wanted to understand).
Her weirdest question was asking if she could have her birthday party there

I have no children, but a fab relationship with my 7 years old Niece. I treat her as much as I can as an equal, we have some very good conversations and she knows I'll always answer honestly, but I might not know the answer straight away (we google lots of things to learn together if I don't know), or that I might have to ask Mummy & Daddy before I give an answer.

She once told me she had a question, which she'd saved for me, because she knew I would give her a real answer and she said she felt 'safe' asking me. She wasn't ready to ask it yet, and had to wait until she felt ok inside to ask. I was dreading it.

Right at the end of our day out just as we were nearly back at the car she said she finally felt brave enough to ask her question......"Auntie, what does frog poo look like?". 🤦🏻‍♀️

Does God have a willy?

most pointless conversation ever
dd asked “is his name martin?” when there was just us two in the car.
“who are you talking about”
”martin”
“is martin’s name martin?”
”yes”
”yes martin’s name is martin”