To think that girl's and women's swimsuits are sexualised

[DieselBlue89]

Why should I have to make sure I've tidied my pubic hair before going swimming? None of my other clothes cut so close to my genitalia.
Is it about aerodynamics? (the swim shorts worn by most men definitely aren't)
Or were they designed by men and now we're all just conforming to societal norms?

The pubic hair story however has made me think. What’s our right to look natural and however we like vs other people’s right to have pleasant surroundings? Freedom to vs freedom from? Where’s the line on that?

I'd rather not see men with hairy fat bellies and saggy little arses and scrawny legs in Speedos or shorts but I can't exactly tell them to cover up.

The pubic hair story however has made me think. What’s our right to look natural and however we like vs other people’s right to have pleasant surroundings? Freedom to vs freedom from? Where’s the line on that?

I think the line is clean/dirty or hygienic/unhygienic.

^ exactly what pp said. Protect each other from an actual danger, not beliefs or ideas. Maybe if pubic hair is long enough to tangle you up so you risk drowning it should be trimmed

Hi guys, hopefully I can get someone else's point of view, and you can tell me if I'm going crazy or I have a right to feel pretty damn let down!!

So I have a number of health conditions and am registered disabled,

I've never used my daughters school car park disabled bays as I felt I didn't need to at that point, my pain and disability was manageable. ( its a private gated carpark with buzzer entry , for the use if both infant and junior school)

My slaughter is niw in the juniours just started the new school year, my health is deteriorated my disability affects 1 of my legs now and cases me a great deal of pain , I cannot walk too far and so as per the policy I wrote in to Head of school and asked for permission to park in the disabled bay in the on site car park, listed my conditions etc, later that week I had the decision which was granted I have acess... then it all goes T##s up.....

My health conditions cause me to not be able to take my children to sxhool in the mornings, and so I have a very supportive husband that does all this for me , drops them off and bevause I want to be part in doing this I always collect them from school so we both have a part each.

However, I have just now been told by school, that I no longer have acess to the disabled bays on site as my husbands the driver ( bearing in mind I'm unable to drive now as the pain I am in with my leg and hip ) and the fact he's the driver then he can collect them for me so I dint need the bay.

I explained that I want to be able to collect my children from school, I already feel low as it is as there's lots I can't do and the 1 thing I want to do is collect them and as well as I can't drop them in the mornings off, the inly way I'm able to do this is if I park on site, I said my husband has to drive me and she said but then he can get them, I explained they would be taking that away from me . And can't my husband just drop me off at the gates outside, which no he can't as its da ferrous, its a main road the school run is chaotic and he'd be obstructing traffic. Also I wouldn't be able to walk that far.

Question is , where do I stand. Am I being petty by feeling so down....what do I do....
Thanks so much for reading my post.

I also suffer from sever anxiety, and ocd and my husband is my registered carer.

@princesscharming23

Hiya you've posted this in the wrong place. No worries but it's a thread about swimsuits so you're not going to get any traffic. x

Oops il delete it now, yiu can tell I'm a newbie :-) thank you though

Or you could be like me and rock the girly scanty bikini with hairy legs and unwaxed bikini line just like men have hair around their shorts! It's the hiding of women's pubic hair that causes the vicious cycle! I personally don't give a toot! My friend thinks I'm gross but I feel free!

Sorry this made me laugh!!...😂

I would prefer for all men and boys to wear a singlet in the pool. I am very uncomfortable around topless men. But I don't get to tell them to cover up.

It does strike me as an enormous double standard that women's functional breasts are deemed indecent but men's useless vestigal nipples are fine to show off.

I bought a selection of boy leg swim shorts from Shein after a disaster from Decathlon that didn’t fit anywhere at all. Mine were the granny knickers type but I think they had board short design too. The quality was fine - thick fabric. Wore them a lot on holiday. Similar (same) versions of some of the designs are on Amazon and other swim websites but 2 or 3 times the price. Regatta do one or two as well but unfortunately the pants were ill fitting for me.

You don't HAVE to tidy up your pubic hair before swimming. I go to the beach in swimsuits that show my pubes. No one has ever commented. I doubt they have noticed. People are too involved in themselves to be staring at my groin.

Thoughts welcome on this....

I swim, a lot. I wild swim 3 times a week (always in skins) and pool swim 2 mornings week. For both I wear a 'regular' swimsuit, as I am currently training to do the ice mile challenge in which wetsuits are not permitted.

I am mid-fifties and overweight (swimsuit size 20-22). I really do love the leg/boy leg swimsuits as shown on here by others, but have never bought or worn one and here's the thing.....

As a 'larger lady', I'm sure I would feel more self-conscious in a pool wearing a suit in this style, as part of me thinks I will be drawing more attention to myself with people thinking "oh look, she's fat and self-conscious so is covering herself up". I honestly believe I blend in better in a regular (albeit modes) swimsuit.

Is that bonkers or does anyone relate? I'm not embarrassed about my extra cargo, quite the opposite - I'm proud of my level of fitness given my age and extra weight, and my additional lbs definitely help in water temperatures under 5 degrees! But I feel that covering up more of my body than my fellow swimmers will give that impression.

@Atticustheaardvark Perhaps you should buy one of those suits and see how you feel wearing it at the pool.

For what it's worth, I don't think my reaction to seeing an overweight person at the pool would be particularly different depending on what kind of swimsuit they were wearing. If I saw a larger lady wearing a very small bikini I might think, "Good for you", but that's probably coming more from the perspective that I am a size 10, albeit a rather wobbly postpartum size 10, and I would feel self conscious wearing a tiny bikini. But I don't think I would have the opposite reaction, i.e. seeing a larger lady wearing a suit with fuller coverage and think, "She must have chosen that suit because she's self conscious about her body." I probably wouldn't think anything at all, but if I did, I would just think you had chosen to wear whatever you felt most comfortable in.

And that is what you should do. So try it out, and if you feel more comfortable in it, wear it, and if you feel less comfortable in it, don't. I wouldn't worry about what other people think. They will be more focused on themselves.

Is that bonkers or does anyone relate? I'm not embarrassed about my extra cargo, quite the opposite - I'm proud of my level of fitness given my age and extra weight, and my additional lbs definitely help in water temperatures under 5 degrees! But I feel that covering up more of my body than my fellow swimmers will give that impression.

Wow at training for an 'ice swim'. I sea swim regularly now and it's been amazing.

Seriously with respect , I just don't think other people are thinking that hard about you. They really aren't.

The boy leg swimsuits are as much about ease and comfort as coverage. If you fancy it give it a whirl. You sound like you are doing amazing things that the majority would find really challenging, don't be held back on this ( in reality ) insignificant thing.

@Atticustheaardvark - I think that anything ultra brief or cutaway or anything that covers a lot more than usual is more likely to be noticed, but be who you really are. Personally, l tend to wear a low back one piece to the pool, and, where l can, go topless on the beach.

Women have fought hard in Copenhagen, Paris and New York for the right to go topless in pools (Copenhagen) and parks (Paris and New York) to de-sexualise the female breast, help prevent schoolboy type sniggering and bring in an equality of standards with males.

@Atticustheaardvark I swim in both pools and open water (no ice swimming though!). I do look at what people are wearing and of course I do notice different shapes and sizes.
Regarding what people are wearing I notice if a suit looks really comfortable or uncomfortable, I notice if it looks great for OWS i.e. a two piece is much easier than a one piece when getting dressed/undressed outside in the cold.
I applaud people who are in skins when I'm in a wetsuit.
I might notice if someone is wearing something that is ill-fitting or has worn out on the arse!

Haven't RTFT so this has probably been said but... as well as the "legsuit" options, you can just buy men's swim shorts, you know. I've worn those with a sports women's swimming top for years. My tummy is nothing special but I don't particularly object to getting it out. If you do, you can do as a friend of mine does and wear men's shorts over a regular women's costume.

I agree that the default choices are horrid and it ought to be easier to choose within the women's section. But honestly men's shorts are very easily available.

True, but not ideal if you have a defined waist and hips.
Men's shorts that would fit my hips would have a massive waist which would result in masses of bunched fabric.

Following with interest, I feel like when you put on your swimsuit you're always assailed with thoughts of Oh my God am I toned/OK looking enough to be seen in this and figuring out how to epilate, hold tummy in etc so that you will be acceptable to public view rather than realising you don't actually have to show that much of your body off. I'm going to the Middle East for a hol in late autumn and will be ordering a couple of modest swimsuits off Shein, they have quite a selection, basically a top and leggings with a detachable skirt or tunic that comes just below the bum and I had such a feeling of liberation even looking at them and thinking that in them, at least my middle aged flesh wouldn't be able to be judged! Sure it's prob my own insecurity but I say if you feel like it, just cover up, you don't need to put on a show for anyone.

I found men's shorts, the long free ones, very uncomfortable to swim in tbh. Too much floating around me

@InYourHeadZombieeeaeaeaea - Precisely! For most of us swimwear is tight and brief for a reason. And it’s not all about showing off your curves!

So if it's not women who want them for their girls, and the girls don't, who the hell is encouraging girls in bikinis? That's quite the thought.

They see the ads and tv programs with attractive women in next to nothing and want to be like that soaking up the sun in the jet set life. Its what advertising is all about.

I doubt there are many male swimsuit designers. I think male swim wear can have the same issues when you see them on the beach in their budgie smugglers.