To tell teacher about this

[Worriedeve]

I really think my daughter has started behaving badly since she got in with the wrong 2 girls at school (y6). I’ve noticed a change in her behaviour that is quite bad! (Answering back, interested in makeup/short skirts) The girls she hangs out with are very much like this. Aibu to speak to teacher? Could she do anything?

I think you need to work on your communication with her. It's a more urgent and far-reaching issue than the skirts or makeup.

Taking away her devices isn't going to improve your relationship with her, or her (in your view) rebellious attitude. It'll just make them worse.

I think you need to really engage with her so she opens up. Is she unhappy with these friends? You'll only find out by talking with her properly.

I don't think you are properly talking and listening with her. I think you're probably talking AT her. This is why she screams at you, because she doesn't feel heard, because she feels there's no common ground.

In her world, short skirts and make up are completely normal. In your world, they aren't; she's too young, or they send the wrong message, etc. You need to find common ground and see each other's point of view.

And yes, her friends are completely external to all this, and the school even more so

This is a you problem not a teacher problem. What would the teacher do?! You are being ridiculous.

this made me laugh! Let us know how that works out

on a serious note I think you need to come to terms with the fact that pre teens and teens like make up rolling their skirts and BOYS! Us parents don’t want them to as it scares us but if you don’t talk to them about these things or come in to strict and disapproving it won’t stop them they will just hide it from you to appease you. So your gonna need to choose if you want to be lied to and oblivious to these things or if you want to know the truth, however hard that is and be able to guide and support them.

Sorry was replying this

NorthStarRising · 21/09/2023 19:35

What do you want the teacher to do? 😂
It’s your daughter, tell her you disapprove of her choices and want her to remain uninterested in short skirts and make up. That should sort out the problem.

But her behaviour is good at school? OP you aren't seeing things clearly....if the problem was the crowd then the behaviour would be everywhere.

For all you know, she could be the ringleader. Parents never think their own children are the instigators of trouble.

I bought make up with pocket money in Y6 - a long time ago, 1986, and did well in school. It doesn't mean she is going off the rails.