German machines bleeping at me

[itsmeafterall]

Lighthearted.

My kitchen has an array of very efficient, quality and good looking (German) appliances. They do their job well.

Buy they all beep, Aggressively, at me all of the time.

The dishwasher beeps (and opens its own door!) at cycle start and end
The induction Hob beeps when you turn it on, when you put something on it, when you set it, when the timer is up, when the magnetic knob becomes attached
And when you accidentally lock it.

The oven beeps when you set it, when it's at correct temperature and when it's finished it's thing.

The washing machine is a bastard.
It beeps endlessly at cycle end until you get up and see to it. Every 10 seconds. 😳

It's a fecking cacophony of beeps in my kitchen. Need 🎧

Why oh why ? And is this confined only to German appliances or do others do it too ?

My Miele washing machine used to beep like a lunatic but I reprogrammed it not to. 😇
The dryer was even easier; it has a buzzer ON/ OFF button.

Brava!

Bosch Varioperfect to turn off end beeps....
Set the dial to the off position
Turn the dial one click clockwise.
Once the display has lit up, hold down the Eco perfect button.
Turn the dial another TWO clicks clockwise (whilst still holding the Eco button).
Now press spin cycle selection button (under "rinse hold")
You can keep pressing this button to choose the volume of your beeb
You will notice a different spin cycle speed light display each time you press it
Once you have selected your required volume (i.e. Silent!), turn the dial back to the off position

The microwave is not the loudest but the most problematic one, though. How am I supposed to hide my food from the children? Is there any brand that can be muted?

My new robot vacuum talks. It announces what it’s doing ‘I am charging’ or ‘I am starting to clean’. And if it comes across something scary, like a mat, ‘I need help!’.
I bought it to make my life easier, I have 3 dc constantly needing help, I don’t want a needy robot too.

No German appliances but the dishwasher, washing machine and microwave all beep. The microwave also does that idiotic thing of beeping incessantly if you don't immediately get up and pay it attention!

This thread has made me laugh! Husband and i have talked about being shouted at by german appliances.
We have the aforementioned Bosch varioperfect washing machine that bleeps angrily when it's finished. (I used to have an LG one that played a tune.)
Happily the Bosch dishwasher doesn't shout.
Kenwood fridge/freezer and a Logik kettle do bleep!

• The washing machine is a bastard. It beeps endlessly at cycle end until you get up and see to it. Every 10 seconds. 😳*

Oh god don't, our Bosch is an incessant beeper. I feel kicking the shit out of the bastard when it starts.

There are interesting cultural differences - our German appliances play insistent beeps, but our Japanese rice cooker plays delicate little tunes!

Our beko fridge has a beep that sounds just like one of the beeps that was in the special care baby when DS was in. Was very unnerving when we first got it!

My Bosch tumble dryer is like a crying baby and it will go on and on even when the washing isn't dry so you have to trick it.

Not much in our kitchen beeps as it is all ancient. However a couple of things do and when those or my phone bleep tjey are accompanied by my adult SN son yelling the house down that whatever it is bleeped. If its in the kitchen he usually yells that the microwave has bleeped in spit of us not having had a microwave for years! I also get told that my phone has bleeped or rung even kf its in my hand at the time!

My Samsung does that 🤣. It's a good machine though

No word of a lie, the criterion "beep can be disabled" is top of my list when I buy a new appliance.

This is my life too. Entire kitchen beeping. Also, DH says he's never heard a car that beeps as much as mine does. It's constant.

Japanese rice cooker plays delicate little tunes!

I wish my Japanese car played delicate music, it beeps like a supermarket checkout.

I'm worried about the woman who tells me there is roadworks or traffic in 1 mile, she sounds very stressed. I'm thinking of putting a Valium on the dash for her.

Not German, but my kitchen is also full of whining demanding appliances. The fridge beeps to let you know you've opened the door for more than a nanosecond. The freezer likewise, and if you don't immediately get up and close the door, it continues to beep even after you do, so you have to reset the whole thing.
I have 2 microwaves- one which beeps incessantly till you open it, and the other which has some sort of problem which makes it wail and groan like some kind of ghost (we call it the haunted microwave)
The toaster, however- silent as the grave, even when it has set your toast on actual fire and the flames are climbing the walls...

Yes, I have the same problem, everything beeps at me.. although it's not just a German problem, it's a full multi-national experience.

Except the washing machine and tumble dryer which instead play Die Forelle by Schubert. I quite like that!

😂😂😂😂😂😂

I recently replaced my fridge freezer with one that bleeps if you leave the door open too long. It was a bloody menace during the recent hot spell.
It does alert us to when the dog opens the door. Although now the freezer is on the bottom she just gets a cold nose.

I've got a singing LG washer dryer but our Neff appliances e.g. oven and hob are, thankfully, silent. The Hotpoint dishwasher barely even bothers to finish a cycle, let alone beep at you to open it.

Yes, I got a new washing machine last year (Siemens again as the previous one lasted so long) and this one beeps! Why? All I’m going to do is turn it off, and then leave the washing in it until I’m ready, the beeping won’t make me hang it out any quicker. It’s worse than the cat

Is anyone else concerned by the fact that they all use the exact same beep? The beep that transcends companies and countries of origin - a truly multinational beep? Or a cheap chinese component designed to infiltrate our kitchens and drive the western world insane?

I could cope with the constant “me ! me! Look at meeee!” if I only knew which of the fucking devices was shouting.

This is especially baffling when your DC somehow turn it into Spanish.

I have a kitchen stuffed with Miele appliances. You can turn them off through the settings (well I managed to silence the dishwasher), but I find the washing machine and oven ones quite useful as I don't tend to hang about in the kitchen/utility.

What is less useful is that one of our local blackbirds is an excellent mimic and has almost nailed "Miele", alongside "car alarm".